What A Boy Wants Part 8

She cut her eyes at me. My room, Bastian. Ill have anyone I want in my room. Aspen turned to Pris and the jerks were smirking like theyd hit the d.a.m.n jackpot and I wanted nothing more than to pummel them.

Invite who you want and text us later, okay? Pris said to one of them. They hugged the girls and then walked out.

You guys can be suck jerks. Pris grabbed Aspens arm and then the two of them stalked out.

I groaned. Id obviously screwed up. What the h.e.l.l just happened?

Jaden shook his head at me like he felt sorry for me. And now you know why Im sticking to hook-ups. Girls are crazy.

This weekend wasnt going the way Id imagined it. The girls managed to avoid us for the rest of the day. They went to the store to pick up stuff for the party that I was still totally against. Who would have thought it? Sebastian Hawkins didnt want to party. Once I decided to go for it with Aspen, I wanted this weekend to be special. You know, like long walks on the beach, and all that other special stuff that used to make me want to gouge my own eyes out.

They spent the afternoon locked in Priss room getting ready. Jaden tried to hang out, but I wasnt really in the mood. I spent some time playing my guitar before getting ready. Whether I approved or not, I still planned to look d.a.m.n good. I wore a pair of long, khaki shorts that went below my knees, black Vans, and a black b.u.t.ton up s.h.i.+rt.

When I got downstairs, Jay wasnt there, but the girls were sitting on the porch. As I walked out to talk to them, the jerks from the pool hall showed up with a few cases of beer in their hands. Great. Before I could get a chance to try and talk to Aspen, Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum pulled the girls inside. A few minutes later a couple more guys showed up. Girls, guys, girls, guys, in flocks until the house looked like some frat party I should be enjoying much more than I was. We didnt even have time to come up with our Pre-party Plan. And I sound like a freakin idiot.

Was it possible love screwed with your head? I mean, girls didnt realize the power they held. That they were really the ones who pulled the strings. Even when we thought we had the power, it was them, because right now I had a hot chick shaking what her mama gave her in my face and all I could think of was Aspen and if she was mad at me or not and how wed make it through a h.e.l.l of a good party without a PPP.

Hi. A warm body pressed against me and it felt all wrong. Flowers, not the d.a.m.n cinnamon that was driving me to the nut house.

Hey. I moved away from her through the crowd of people filling the beach house.

Whats your name? Great. The leech was still on my tail.

Sebastian.

Do you want to dance or something?

I sighed, stopped and looked at her. It surprised me because she didnt look like the girls who usually approached me at parties. She dressed like Aspen would instead of flas.h.i.+ng the goods to everyone. It was a nice change, but as nice as it was, she wasnt who I needed right now. I really appreciate you asking, but Im kind of looking for my girl. I mean, shes not mine, but Im hoping she will be. Well, shes my friend, but I like her and shes p.i.s.sed at me. Ding. Ding. Ding. Somebody call the fight because it has ended. Id officially lost my touch. Here I was rambling about a girl to a girl.

Id given Aspen, AKA PA, s.h.i.+t about rambling the first time we talked and here I was doing the same thing. Im sorry, but I gotta go. Drown myself in the ocean. Not really, but I felt like it. This situation was so f.u.c.ked up, I couldnt believe it.

I pushed my way through the house and went out the back door. People were already congregating outside, but closer to the house, so I stomped through the sand until the blackness of the ocean was right in front of me and I could taste the salt in the air.

Come out here to make me feel like one of your playthings again? Aspen sat on a rock about fifteen feet away from me. The sharpness in her voice stung me.

And I also had no idea what the h.e.l.l she was talking about.

Um, English, please?

Aspen crossed her arms and turned away from me. Uh-oh. That meant trouble. I walked over to her, a smile curving my lips for the first time since the Tweedle bothers showed up. Woodstockcome on. I stepped in front of her, knowing all I needed to do was get her to look at me and all would be forgiven. She turned away. Hey. Stop avoiding me. I stepped up right next to her. Her hands were over her face now, blocking her from me. Aspen, talk to me.

Her hands jerked away. Thats exactly what Im talking about! Youre treating me like one of your little girls. You totally made me sound like some hooker who was sharing a room with you in more than just a friendly way, but who would try and talk to other guys. Now youre using the smooth voice. Trying to wrap me around your finger, but Im p.i.s.sed, so think again, buddy! She poked my chest and tried to walk away, but I grabbed her wrist gently.

Hey. I almost shook my head at how my voice sounded. It wasnt that smooth voice I used on other girls, it was emotional, sincere. I would never treat you badly. You should know that.

She looked up at me with big eyes and I could tell that Id somehow hurt her much more than I realized. I was still a little lost on how, but I intended to figure that out. Lets go for a walk?

She nodded her head yes, so I let my hand slide down her wrist until it latched with hers, twining our fingers together. And it didnt feel like I was trying to brand her, it didnt feel crazy and obsessive, it just felt good.

I led her down the beach, trying to walk slow and easy when my whole body felt jacked up on adrenaline. Neither of us spoke until we were pretty far from that house. I stopped her. I didnt mean to make you sound like a hooker. But I sounded like an idiot. How did I do that exactly?

Aspen sighed, but she didnt let go of my hand. Bastian, you made it sound like we were hooking-up or something. It just sucked. I know theres nothing really going on with us, but I dont like feeling like some name on your list.

Did I say I was jacked up on adrenaline? Now it felt closer to cardiac arrest. I was slipping. Totally losing it, scared to do what I wanted. Freaked out because this time it was something totally different and if I screwed it up, it would kill me.

But the thing was Id never backed down before, and I didnt plan to start now. What if there was? I hooked my finger under her chin, so she couldnt look away from me.

It took her a few seconds to reply and when she did, she sounded all breathy. Just how I felt. What if there was what?

Something going on between us, I said, and lowered my lips to hers.

Chapter Eleven.

So, yeah. You know how when youre watching one of those romance movies and the girl and guy kiss for the first time and the skies split open and doves or something like that are sent down from Heaven to grace them? A love song plays in the background and the kiss looks perfect? They both move together like theyve been doing it forever and every girl in the audience says, aww in unison?

I didnt hear the music. The sky was still dark and the birds were asleep for the night, but I had no doubt if we had a crowd of teen girls theyd be oohing and awing because we didnt need any of that extra s.h.i.+t. It felt perfect and I knew it had to look perfect, because it just felt right.

There was the second of hesitancy when we first touched that her soft lips tensed"probably in shock"but then they relaxed, and molded against mine. That cinnamon scent of hers floated around me, but I tasted it too, all spicy and Aspen, going straight to my head. How could I not have kissed her before? It was like my first time. Actually, Im pretty sure it was because kissing other girls didnt feel like this.

When she pulled her arms up and wrapped them around my neck and I felt her body press against mine, everything inside me started to pop and explode. I teased her lips with my tongue, and she opened up to let me inside. It felt like static electricity"the little zap as her tongue tangled with mine. When she weaved her fingers through the back of my hair, I moaned. I hated it when girls put their hands in my hair, but this wasnt just a girl. It was Aspen.

And just like that, it was over.

Whoa! She jerked away, walking in a circle. Wow. I mean, what was that?

I dont know where it came from. Maybe the high of kissing her for the first time made me a little delirious or something, but I chuckled. I think thats supposed to be my line.

Her arms were wrapped around herself as she looked at me. Sebastian, we just kissed! And it was... She shopped walking, opening her mouth, and closing it again.

I left ya speechless, huh?

She punched me in the arm. How can you be conceited at a time like this? Youre my best friend, Bastian. We cant do this, she waved her arm back and forth between us. Im not one of your girls. Im not going to think I won the jackpot because Sebastian Hawkins stuck his tongue down my throat and then broke my heart by never talking to me again.

Okay, that dented my high a bit. What? Im not like that. The girls I hook-up with are in it just for fun. I dont break hearts, Woodstock and you know it. Not after My mom. She knew Id never let a girl think our relations.h.i.+p was more than it was.

She collapsed into the sand, still looking a little out of it. I know. Sorry, Im just Aspen locked her hands behind her head. Then she sighed, sliding her hand down and touching her fingers to her lips. You kissed me. I mean, lately things have been different and Ive thought about it, but I never thought it would happen. I wasnt even sure how I"but you did. And it was I fell down beside her. Hot.

Aspen laughed and the little ball of stress that was starting to form in my chest loosened. Thats not the word I was going to use, but kind of. She buried her face in her hands. Holy c.r.a.p.

Hey. I pulled her hands away. I turned so I faced her, sitting cross-legged in the sand. Woodstock did the same. I dont want you to feel like this is something less than what it is. This is... d.a.m.n, this was kind of hard. None of my knowledge about the opposite s.e.x prepared me for this moment. I knew all about helping people hook-up, but how did you tell a girl that you liked her? That you loved her and you wanted to be with her because she was so much better than all those other girls out there? Girls could do that. They could talk and go on and freaking on about their feelings, but with guys, it was like this little box of mixed up thoughts locked inside my head. The words were there, but I didnt know how to get to them. Id try and make sense of them, to unlock the box, but then it would slam shut, and all those words would be a jumbled mess again.

Were different. I mean, I want to be different with you. I like you, Woodstock. Almost sent me to the psych ward when I first realized it. Since when did I actually like a girl, much less my best friend? Freaked me out, but I do. Like you and want you, I mean. I totally suck at this.

Um, thanks, I think?

Argh! I rubbed my hand over my face. That was lame, but just focus on the part where I said I like you. More than anything, Aspen. I reached out and touched her face. The beach around us was completely dark except for a few lights scattered along the sidewalk about a hundred feet behind us. The black water lapped up the sh.o.r.e, closer and closer to us, but we didnt move. Youre so soft. How did it take me so long to figure that out?

Her eyes closed and she leaned her cheek into my hand. Ive liked you forever, Bastian. For years I imagined us being together, but you never seemed to feel the same. I was finally moving on.

I had no idea what the moving on part was about, because I knew she hadnt moved on from me. I had my Hook-up Doctor emails to prove that, but I didnt want to embarra.s.s her. I didnt want her to know that I knew what she did and that I was The Hook-up Doctor, so I just said, Im showing you now. Im going crazy for you, Aspen.

This time it was her who leaned forward, taking my mouth. This kiss was even hotter than the last one. She crawled toward me. I threaded my fingers through her hair, pus.h.i.+ng her head closer to me. That zinging was back inside me, ricocheting around like a pinball. I wanted to touch her, but didnt want to move too fast. We were both on thin ice and the last thing I wanted to do was push her. But G.o.d, as she deepened the kiss, I couldnt help it. I swear I tried to be strong, but everything inside me was calling to her.

I leaned forward, laying her back against the sand. Aspen went easily. I rested my body on top of hers. Just touching her like this. Holding her face as our bodies touched everywhere made me feel like a freakin rock star.

After what could have been two minutes or two years, I made the good guy inside me win the tug-o-war and pulled away. Man, I wanted her, but I didnt want her to think it was all physical. I lay down beside her in the sand. Aspen leaned her head on the crook of my arm, so I wrapped it around her. I wanted to jump for joy, but I was too cool for that.

Im in shock, she whispered. One of her arms was fell over my chest and her hand tickled my hair.

Must be a side effect of my amazing kissing skills, I teased her.

Oh, yeah. Must be, sarcasm dripped from her words.

Without the playfulness in my words, I spoke, I dont want to mess this up. I know this might come as a surprise to you, but Ive been known to make a mess of things.

No? You? Tickle. Tickle. I actually kind of loved having my hair played with now.

Like I said, a shock, huh? It rocked that she got my sense of humor and always dished it right back at me. I breathed deep, trying to slow the drum solo that was my heartbeat. You can do this, Bastian. I needed to get real for just a second. I wanted to make sure she knew that this was different. That I loved her, even though Id probably drop dead swallowing my tongue if I tried to tell her. Those three words? Scary as h.e.l.l. Maybe not for people who threw them around, but for a guy who never expected to feel them and did? Yeah, they pretty much made me want bury my head in the sand and never come up.

But if I wanted to be good to her, really good, make her and my mom proud, I needed to say something. I pulled her on top of me. Her legs were on either side of me, straddling me as I felt the water rising enough to touch my Vans. She was worth ruining a pair of shoes over.

Youre freaking me out, Bastian. You look like youre about to puke.

Great. I totally sucked at this knight-in-s.h.i.+ning-armor thing. The other night at your house you said I want to take care of people. That I want to protect people? Just you, Woodstock. The only people in this world I need to protect are my mom and you.

She smiled and I squeezed her tighter. That hadnt been so hard. Maybe this would work out after all.

Its not just your kissing thats amazing, Bastian. Its you.

The next morning I woke up with a body pressed tight against mine. Wed stayed at the beach talking"okay, and kissing (but thats it, I swear) for most of the night. When we were pretty sure the party had died down, we went back to the house. Pris was kicking the stragglers out and, after about five minutes of girl talk between them in the kitchen in which I heard some squealing, Aspen and I had gone up to bed. To my surprise, on our way up, we found Jaden all tucked in with the blanket up to his chin like his mommy had put him to bed.

It was strange. Jaden was almost always the last to leave a party, but at the time, I hadnt been able to give it much thought. Id had Aspens hand in mine and I was going to have her in my arms all night. Kind of distracted me from anything else. It was pretty shocking I could even think straight.

Now, I was distracted by something else. I really didnt want her to know how much I wanted her and with the way I was holding her, if she woke up, shed definitely know. Really, its not my fault though, shes hot and Im a guy. Its physics or something like that. So, I tried the old swift roll move I heard about, casually moving away from the way her back tucked against my front. It was a c.r.a.ppy situation. I definitely didnt want to leave her, but I didnt want her to think I was a perv either.

When I got out of the shower and made it back to the room, she sat on the pale yellow blanket, with bed head and shy eyes.

Hey. She looked all apprehensive, like she thought Id changed my mind since last night or something. I needed to rea.s.sure her, but also wanted to try and keep things light. Last night was heavy enough and it might be a news flash, but I wasnt real into heavy.

Who would have thought pillow hair could be so s.e.xy? I dont know if I want to kiss you, or hand you a brus.h.!.+

Her mouth tilted up into a smile. I couldnt help but return it. Youre such a nutcase. She tossed a pillow at me, but I grabbed her hand when she swung, pulling her toward me.

Definitely kiss you.

Her hand snaked up between us, she grabbed my s.h.i.+rt. Yes! Then pushed me away. No!

Gross. I probably have morning breath! She covered her mouth with her hand and then ran from the room. Girls When I got downstairs to the kitchen, Jaden and Pris were both there. Pris fingered a necklace around her neck, that weird Jaden/Pris tension was thick in the air. So, howd the party go last night? I asked, flopping down into a chair.

Fine, they both answered in unison. O-kay.

Plans today? I grabbed a piece of toast off Priss plate and popped a bite in my mouth. Thanks.

Youre lucky I love you, Bastian, but I still have to warn you, you hurt her and youre going down. Thats all I have to say.

I sat forward and touched Priss arm. Hey, Im not going to hurt her. I think Im in love with her. Priss fork dropped, clinking against her plate. Jaden started choking on the other side of the table. Probably wasnt real cool to tell Pris and Jay before I told Aspen, but I wanted Pris to know that I wouldnt hurt Aspen. Yeah, Im a wuss. I cant help it.

So, what are we doing today? Aspen came around the corner and into the kitchen. I pulled my hand away from Pris.

Thats what Im trying to figure out, too.

Chapter Twelve.

Are you sure about this, Sebastian? Aspen asked as we stood on the edge of the dense forest. Wed done the town thing the day before. I didnt want to tell her, but if I went into one more shop we wouldnt make it out without me throwing a much bigger fit than Jaden had. Hence, my whole idea about exploring. Of course, I was no Grisly Adams. I didnt plan to get myself lost, but I figured we could look around a little bit without ending up on the nightly news as one of those groups of people who wandered off and were never seen again.

Plus, there were trails. I made sure.

I pulled her close to me just because I could. Aw, Ill take care of you, baby. I promise.

She got that cute pink on her cheeks and she gave me the biggest smile Id ever seen. Made me feel like the man, knowing I could make her look like that. I put my lips to hers because I didnt think Id ever get tired of her. Ill be like your bodyguard or something. Me Tarzan. You Jane.

I think Im going to puke, Jaden mumbled. Pris pushed him before I had a chance to tell him he was just jealous.

I wasnt really thinking bodyguard. More like tour guide. Aspen rolled her eyes playfully.

I grabbed her hand as we all headed down the trail. That, too. I can do it all. I winked at her.

It was actually pretty cool. I wasnt really the type who got all one with nature. We usually left that stuff up to Mama and Daddy Peace, but it was chill out there. Pris and Jaden kept the arguing to a minimum, Aspen kept herself glued to my side, and there were birds and trees and rustling leaves and all that stuff. It felt like one of those long walk on the beach moments. Cheesy to think about, but actually cool when you really did it.

Shh. Look, Aspen whispered. My feet stopped dead on the brush covered ground, maybe slightly scared she saw a big bear or something, but Id never admit it. Luckily it was just two little squirrels both trying to get the same pinecone. I exhaled. I could take a squirrel much easier than a bear if need be.

Awww, both girls sighed.