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Chapter 40 - Eleventh Hour.
Shepard leaned next to me, gently rocking my shoulders so I wouldn't startle. Lying in the soft bed, I didn't want to get up, because today could very well be my last morning. I rolled over to the other side and inhaled deeply into the sheets where he had laid, capturing his scent. It looked like I was being reluctant, when reality was I was carefully constructing every moment.
"I'm tired."
Two simple words could not express the energy it took to open my eyes. It wasn't a physical lethargy, but an emotional and spiritual one, forged by years of carrying an unimaginable burden. I was ready to lay it down, and today I would find the reprieve I craved for so long.
"There's coffee if you want. I would bring it to you, but the others want to see you."
I smiled at the sweet gesture. He had no idea what was about to conspire, or perhaps he did. I could not prove it was he who anonymously tipped off a bidder that a hit was placed on me, but they used the information in exchange for reformulating a drug they were unsuccessful in stabilizing. I did not want to believe it when I was approached, but the evidence was irrefutable. They were all in on it, including Shepard. I tried to tell myself if he knew that his involvement would mean witnessing my last breath, I doubt he would have agreed. I wondered if they really thought they were protecting me, keeping me safe. No. They were insuring a billion dollar payday for a power hungry dead man.
"I will get dressed and be out a give me just a moment."
Hesitating to leave the room, he finally turned and walked out the door. More than anything, I wanted to shout for him to stop and throw myself into his arms, clinging for dear life. I thought I was being cruel by withholding my affections, but my intuition proved to be right last night. If Shepard was back in my life to be a willing partic.i.p.ant in my murder, there really was no longer a reason to breathe. My reflection in the mirror was the clearest I had ever seen. Past the dark circles and sallow skin, my eyes sparkled with resolve. Carefully styling my hair into a sleek ponytail and tasteful makeup, I looked the way I felt. I was ready.
Walking into the main room, I saw everyone sitting around the table, looking somber as the news played on the flat screen TV. The anchor was speaking in French, yet the subt.i.tles were in English. A new drug had been announced that would revolutionize how diseases were treated. The owner of the company came across the screen, popping corks off champagne with his research team explaining the discovery; along with the news story flashed my photo.
It was called an amazing day in medicine, a breakthrough in science that would save millions of lives. Without a word, I poured a cup of coffee and began to munch on one of the pastries sitting in a white box on the counter. Everyone stared at my nonchalant behavior as I milled about the room, ignoring them. I was impressed at their silence. I could see the questions burning in their eyes, along with the fear on their faces. Hopping up onto the counter, I broke the tension with a little dark humor.
"Since you are going to put a bullet in my head, we should probably go outside; it will make cleaning up go a whole lot faster."
The raspberry jam in my sweet started to ooze out of the side with each bite. Licking my fingers, I felt euphoric. The adrenaline pumping through my veins made it impossible to sit for very long.
"You sabotaged the auction, Violet. How did you know?" David's voice strained as he tried to figure out how I was able to fool so many people, including him. He was no longer Doc in my eyes; he was a monster I wished I had never met.
"Tsk, tsk, tsk." I wagged my finger back and forth.
"That's a secret. However, in my defense, how could I not? I knew the moment I opened that hard drive, you set me up. You thought I was some spineless woman who would never believe her beloved mentor would offer her up like some sacrificial lamb. You manipulated everyone around you in this sick game to get what you wanted. I bet they even thought they were doing something n.o.ble by protecting me."
Walking around the room, I gave the hand gesture of air quotes to emphasize the word protecting. Everyone watched as David and I embroiled in a battle of wits.
"What did you promise them, David? What does it take to get someone to look the other way while innocent people die? Oh wait, we have already discussed this. I am not innocent am I? What did you call me? Oh, that's right; I am wolf in sheep's clothing."
I laughed as I took another bite of my pastry. Never once had I used the Doc's given name before. The implication of what it meant was not lost. Walking towards a speechless Shepard, my head began to shake back and forth as the words hissed out of my mouth. "You are worse than him." Just as I did with his father, I spit in his face with disgust. This time I was fully aware of the consequences of my actions.
As I took one last look around the room, still no one spoke. They were unbelievable cowards. "Let's get this over with." I was not afraid, nor was I angry. If there were an ounce of compa.s.sion in them, it would be swift.
The sun was beating down as the small crowd gathered in a half circle on the deck. With my back to the mast, I dropped to my knees. Closing my eyes, I brought my hands up to my chest, lacing the fingers in prayer. I wasn't asking for my life to be spared; I was giving thanks for the life I did have. It was not idyllic, but it was as I requested. My aunt had successfully contacted the bidder with the information I gave her, along with instructions to broadcast the discovery if I was unreachable on this date.
The company was kind enough to honor my request to wait before announcing the drug. Knowing that today was supposed to be the auction, it was a gentleman's agreement. If David had his way, he would be one of the most powerful men on Earth, and I would be nothing more than a memory. That was not to be. I was able to fulfill my purpose, so my life was not lived in vain.
The answered prayer brought me peace, despite how short lived it would be.
Normally, the sound of a trigger on a semi-automatic weapon being released would send s.h.i.+vers of fear down someone's spine, yet I did not flinch. Calmness washed over me as I heard the bullets leave the chamber and slice through the atmosphere.
The sound of lead hitting flesh is unlike anything else on earth. The way the air leaves the lungs and the subsequent gasps for more is unforgettable. Waiting for the darkness to envelop me, I opened my eyes as Shepard was lowering his shaking arm, tightly gripped on the firearm. Instead of hearing the panicked screams of those on board, there was just Paganini's La Campanella playing sweetly in my soul. I doubted Shepard could hear the words that came out of my mouth, but he could see them well enough. His eyes traced my lips as they slowly moved before curving into a weak smile.
"Thank you."
Epilogue.
"Open your eyes, Violet. Stay with me."
The pressure was too much to bear; everything was falling apart and I had no control. I tried holding on as long as I could. Every synapse in my brain fired in a rapid succession until the warmth spread from my heart to the tips of my fingers and toes. Shaking my head while I screamed loudly, I felt every atom in my being connect with the universe as I died in his arms.
La Pet.i.te Mort.
He still liked to watch me. Now he always wanted me to look back...to hold his gaze as long as possible before coming undone. I liked watching him, too...even while he wasn't being serious.
"Stop smiling like that; it's creeping me out."
His hips rotated softly between my legs, knowing how painfully sensitive I still was, while making a chipmunk face with his cheeks puffed out to the sides. "Better?'
"No, that's worse!"
Shepard grabbed my hands and held them above my head as he leaned in closely and pulled his neck muscles tight, flicking his tongue like a lizard.
"Oh my G.o.d, stop it!"
As I yelled again, writhing beneath him, he laughed like a maniac while pus.h.i.+ng me back to the edge.
"You really want me to stop, Violet? I will." Withdrawing slowly from my hungry center, taunting the entrance, he made me plead with him for mercy.
"No, please don't stop." I held my breath as his hips sank back down, feeling every inch fit exquisitely within me. Each heartbeat shared with this man made me complete, the void unbearable as we parted. "What?" His thumb traced my jaw before taking a gentle bite of my bottom lip. He could tell I was starting to drift away. Pulled back into his vibrant blue eyes, I couldn't get close enough to him. "How could I be so foolish? How are you able to forgive me?"
He lowered down to rest on his elbows, kissing me softly while he remained snugly between my knees. "Violet, everyone who enters your life is there for one of two reasons. To bring you closer to the person you can be, or distract you from fulfilling that potential. What no one realizes is that we choose what role that person plays. I knew who you were from the moment I laid eyes on you. When I thought I didn't have a shot in h.e.l.l, you still made me want more in life. That never went away. The only thing that changed was I wanted you back at any cost.
Good people make bad choices every day. Sometimes those choices hurt people, people they love. We can choose to stay angry and remain imprisoned, or we can forgive and let go. Once again, it's a choice. I chose to forgive you. That's what love does."
My lips trembled underneath his as the tears flowed down my cheeks, soaking his palms. When he tilted his hips slightly, I remembered we were in the middle of an intimate encounter, and suddenly felt guilty for ruining the moment.
Determined not to stay bogged down in the somber mood, I asked him to let me up for a minute. Appearing somewhat concerned, he watched closely as I quickly ran into the other room and plucked a book of sonnets by Shakespeare from the shelf.
"Violet, what is that for?"
Crawling back into the bed I gave my most coquettish smile. "Revenge, darling."
I pushed Shepard on his back and straddled his waist. Lowering myself down, I hissed at the delicious sensation that never failed to overtake me. While handing him the book, I smiled. "Pick one."
He licked his thumb before turning the pages, eyeing me with mischief a no doubt scheming about everything he planned to do. He turned to the middle of the book, and returned it to me while lifting his hips slowly as his thumb lightly circled my c.l.i.toris. Ignoring the pleasure with all of my might, I began with Sonnet 23.
"As an unperfect actor on the stage
Who with his fear is put besides his part,
Or some fierce thing replete with too much rage,
Whose strength's abundance weakens his own heart.
So I, for fear of trust, forget to say
The perfect ceremony of love's rite,
And in mine own love's strength seem to decay,
O'ercharged with burden of mine own love's might.
O, let my books be then the eloquence
And dumb presagers of my speaking breast,
Who plead for love and look for recompense
More than that tongue that more hath more express'd.
O, learn to read what silent love hath writ:
To hear with eyes belongs to love's fine wit."
Making it through without stumbling, I handed back the book and smirked, although I knew I was in trouble. He quickly turned through the pages to Sonnet 140 before resuming his slow torture.
"Be wise as thou art cruel; do not press My tongue-tied patience with too much disdain, Lest sorrow lend me words, and words express The manner of my pity-wanting pain.
If I might teach thee wit, better it were, Though not to love, yet love, to tell me so, As testy sick men, when their deaths be near, No news but health from their physicians know.
For if I should despair, I should grow mad, And in my madness might speak ill of thee.