Carter Kids: Thorn Part 24

Noah didn't say a word to me the entire drive to the hotel. He didn't touch me either. He just sat in the backseat with me on his lap and stared out the window as his chest rose and fell quickly.

And I got the instinct impression that trouble was brewing.

THE MINUTE WE STEPPED FOOT in the hotel suite the adrenalin and pure f.u.c.king rage that had been bubbling up inside of me came to a head. Pulling at my s.h.i.+rt, I ripped it off my chest and slung it over the back of the couch in the sitting room area before stalking off in the direction of the bedroom.

Slamming my hands against the double doors, I stalked inside and away from Teagan.

I couldn't be around her right now.

I was out of control and every time I looked at the bruise forming under her left eye and that f.u.c.king ripped dress, a little more of my sanity disappeared.

Images of the p.r.i.c.k touching her were all I could think of.

How long had it been going on?

Did she love him?

"f.u.c.k!" Grabbing the lamp on the nightstand next to my bed, I flung it against the wall, watching as it shattered to pieces. It wasn't enough to dispel the anger inside of me. Not enough by half. Ripping the nightstand out of its slot, I tossed that too, and then the television, the laptop, and everything that wasn't nailed down.

I should have come back for her sooner.

I should have boarded a plane the day I was released and dragged her home kicking and screaming.

G.o.ddammit, I was so jealous I could taste it.

The thought of him touching her, being inside her, f.u.c.king putting his mouth on her drove me bats.h.i.+t crazy.

The door opened inwards and I tensed.

"Are you going to talk to me?" Teagan asked in a quiet tone. "Or do you want me to leave?"

Like h.e.l.l she was leaving me again.

We were having this out.

Right f.u.c.king now.

THE MINUTE WE STEPPED FOOT in the Presidential Suite at the hotel, the s.h.i.+t hit the proverbial fan.

Pulling at his black s.h.i.+rt, Noah ripped it off his chest and slung it over the back of the couch in the sitting room area before stalking off in the direction of the double doors at the far side of the room. Slamming both doors open, he disappeared from view.

Slipping out of my shoes, I crept over to where Noah had disappeared, and listened to the carnage occurring on the other side of the wall. The sound of gla.s.s shattering and furniture overturning filled my ears and I cringed.

Steeling my resolve, I stepped inside. The bedroom looked like a tornado had pa.s.sed through it. There was furniture overturned and gla.s.s on the floor. In the middle of the wreckage stood Noah, looking more furious than I'd ever seen.

"Are you going to talk to me?" I straight out asked him, watching him tense when I spoke. "Or do you want me to leave?"

"When?" he finally asked, jaw clenched.

"A few months back. It only happened one time," I whispered, knowing full well what he was asking me. He wanted to know about Liam. "I was drunk and lonely and trying to move on from you," I added quietly, thinking back to the worst mistake of my life.

"How long?" he managed to grind out as a vein throbbed in his neck.

"How long what?" I whispered, feeling nervous and unsure.

"How long did you wait before you let him put his d.i.c.k in what's mine?" Noah snarled, chest heaving. "How long have you been messing around with him? How. f.u.c.king. Long, Teagan?"

"It wasn't like that," I shot back, feeling both embarra.s.sed and rejected. Noah was losing control, he was barely holding onto his temper by a thread and I wasn't going to push him over the edge.

"Then how was it?" I watched as a vein ticked in Noah's neck. His words were laced with sarcasm and pain as he shook his head and laughed humorlessly. "Don't tell me; you f.u.c.ked him and thought of me?"

"Yes," I hissed back. "But you need to understand I thought you betrayed me."

"How many G.o.dd.a.m.n times do I have to tell you," he growled as he stalked towards me. Backing me up against the door, Noah leaned down and hissed, "I didn't f.u.c.king betray you."

"Don't you think I know that by now?" I demanded, pressing my hand to his chest, feeling all his heat and hardness. "G.o.d, Noah, don't you think I've realized that I'm to blame for all of this?" Knowing Noah was innocent only made this conversation ten times harder. I had abandoned him. I had left him to rot in a prison cell for five years and I had slept with Liam. I had forced him to the back of my mind and I had carried on with life. I had left him behind. It made me want to scratch my own eyes out. I was royally sickened with myself. And still, when I was in trouble, he was the first one to defend me. To jump in and save me over and over again. I could live a thousand lifetimes and never deserve him.

"I know I've screwed everything up. I get it, but you need to understand that your life terrifies me, Noah," I cried out. "Your choices, your history, your mood swings, and how you make me feel all scare me to death. You terrify me, Noah!" I choked out, panting, as adrenalin rushed through my veins. "But when I'm with you, I feel safe, and alive, and like I belong. You do that to me," I told him. "You bring those emotions out of me. No one else."

"You think it's any different for me?" he shot back, chest heaving. "You are the only thing I am afraid of on this planet," he roared. "You have the ability to destroy me. I never put myself in the position to be hurt before you and you rip me open daily. You're the one who's treacherous."

Shaking my head, I let out a harsh cry. "What's the f.u.c.king point anyway?" I choked out. "Nothing I can say can fix this or rewind the last seven years."

Leaning against the door, I threw my hands in the air in weary defeat. I was in the wrong. I knew it. He knew it. But now I accepted it, and that made it hard to breathe. I felt like a knife was piercing through my heart, tearing strips off my soul. "There's no way you can still want me "

"I will always want you, Teagan," he shot back, his voice thick with emotion. "There will always be a way back for us." I watched as Noah clenched and unclenched his fists as he struggled to stay still. "Keep going," he ordered in a tight tone of voice as a vein in his neck throbbed. "Get it all f.u.c.king out, I need to hear it."

"I've spent the best part of a decade believing I wasn't good enough for you. Believing that I wasn't good enough to keep you," I admitted, voice broken, with tears streaming down my cheeks as my emotions boiled over. "I know I was wrong, but back then all I knew was that the one person who I trusted more than my own family, who I loved more than anyone on this planet, had betrayed me. And even then, I still wanted you and that made me hate myself more than I've ever hated you." Shaking my head I exhaled a broken sigh. "And then you were released and I never heard from you. Months later you're everywhere; the television, the Internet, the papers. And I had to watch you with those girls, rubbing it in my face on the TV. I couldn't cope with the rejection or the pain so I ran to the one person who I knew wanted me. Liam was safe; he couldn't hurt me because I didn't have any room left inside of me to store the pain. You say you want me, Noah, but I didn't know that back then...so I tried to move on from you. I tried to force myself into believing Liam was what was right for me "

"He's not what's right for you, Teagan," Noah hissed. His eyes never left mine as he took a step back and said, "he's what's safe for you. I'm what's right for you. Me." He beat his fist against his chest and that small pa.s.sionate display of male dominance caused me to clench tight in antic.i.p.ation. "That f.u.c.ker wants you," Noah snarled. "Wants inside what's mine."

Regaining the s.p.a.ce he had put between us in two short strides, Noah placed his hands on either side of my face and stared into my eyes for a long moment. "I'm going to f.u.c.k him right out of you," he growled before slamming his body against mine and claiming my mouth with his in a kiss so rough, my heartbeat soared and my core pulsed with need. I could taste his blood on my tongue as it dueled with mine, plunging into my mouth, owning me, taking me over.

Pulling back, Noah took my bottom lip between his teeth and tugged hard. "This is mine," he hissed, dropping his hand to cup my p.u.s.s.y. "From here on out, this belongs to me. You got it?"

There were no words in my vocabulary in that moment that I could squeeze out. I wasn't a submissive woman, but this man...he broke all my rules. Nodding my head, I sagged against him, wanting him to claim me, needing to forget that I had let another man touch me where only Noah had before.

"He doesn't love you. He wants to possess you because you walked away from him...when he's had his fill, he will walk away from you and you will be alone."

Liam's words impaled my brain and I tore my mouth away from Noah's. "Tell me you're with me for more than revenge," I asked, breathless and panting.

"What?" Noah grumbled, breathing hard, his eyes never leaving my face. "Are you for real?"

"Tell me all of this is not just to prove a point. Noah," I repeated. "Tell me you're not going to walk away from me when you get bored."

Dropping his hands from my face, he turned around and strode over to the opposite side of the room and opened the bathroom door. "I don't f.u.c.king believe this," he said, laughing humorlessly before disappearing inside only to reappear in the doorway a few moments later with a black t-s.h.i.+rt in his hands.

Tossing it towards me, he said, "Put this on," before gesturing at my ripped dress. "I can't look at you like that."

"Tell me, Noah," I growled as I caught the s.h.i.+rt mid-air and flung it down on the bed.

"Tell you what?" he demanded. "That everything I've done every fight, every training session, every drop of blood I've spilled, and every ounce of blood I've shed has been for you? For this moment? To be standing in front of you, looking into your eyes, and showing you how much you mean to me?"

I opened my mouth to speak but Noah got there before me.

"I memorized every inch of you. I f.u.c.king loved you even when I hated you most," he roared hoa.r.s.ely. "You broke my trust, Thorn, you ripped my G.o.dd.a.m.n heart out of my chest, but you're still the only one I want by my side. At my lowest point all I wanted was you. At my highest point all I want is you. I must be a m.a.s.o.c.h.i.s.tic b.a.s.t.a.r.d because after all these years and all this pain I still want to halve my soul with you. Split myself down the center and give you owners.h.i.+p of me."

Exhaling heavily, he added, "Is that enough honesty for you, Teagan, or would you rather just go on doubting my intentions?"

Noah didn't give me a chance to answer before disappearing into the bathroom again and this time he closed the door behind him.

Seconds later the sound of shower running filled my ears.

Letting it sink in, all his words of love and promise, I felt shame. Shame for denying this man for so long. Knowing I had to do something to fix this, I stripped off my clothes, crept over to the door, and slipped inside. My eyes honed in on Noah and I moaned in appreciation.

He was standing in the shower with his back to me, head bent, as the water cascaded over his huge muscular frame.

My eyes drifted over every inch of his skin, soaking in his raw masculine beauty, studying the huge black tattoo that covered the whole of his back. I lowered my gaze and my core clenched. He had an a.s.s that I swear to G.o.d, you could crack walnuts with. Everything was just so... tight and firm. I wanted to taste every inch of his skin to see if it still tasted the same, felt the same. He was more of a man than I had ever seen.

Padding over the cold marble tiles, I drew back the gla.s.s door of the shower and stepped inside.

His body tensed when I wrapped my arms around his stomach. The atmosphere changed almost instantly, thickening, and I honestly didn't know which way this was going to go. But then he exhaled heavily, covered my hands with his, and my body sagged in relief.

"I'm so sorry, baby," I whispered, pressing a kiss to his back. He needed to hear this, and in this moment, I would say and do whatever it took to ease his pain. "For everything."

"Thorn..." he groaned, squeezing my hand.

"I never stopped loving you," I choked out, kissing his back again and again. "You're still my in."

His big body shuddered, his head bowed, and it humbled me to know that I affected him like this. "Don't play with me," he whispered in such a tender and uncertain voice that I wanted to cry. "Don't tell me this if you're gonna take it away again."

"I won't," I vowed. My heart was hammering so hard I thought it would burst through my chest. "Let me back in, Noah, and I won't let you down again. I promise."

Reaching around, Noah caught my arm and drew me up against his chest. "You better be d.a.m.n sure about this, Thorn," he croaked out, holding me flush against him as the water poured down on us. "Because I'm not letting you go again." Dropping his face, he said, "if you're with me, you're with me for life. No more chasing after you. No more games."

Nodding my head, I whispered, "I'm in," before raising my face to his and claiming his mouth, kissing him deep and slow. His tongue snaked out and dueled with mine, as we held onto each other. It was slow and sensual and everything I had been missing all these years.

Wrapping my arms around his neck, he hoisted me up and took a step forward, pressing me against the wall of the shower, caging me in with his beautiful body.

I knew I was playing a dangerous game, I wasn't on birth control, but I couldn't deny this man entry to my body. So I opened my legs willingly, giving myself up completely, wanting nothing more than to be with him.

"I was always coming back for you, Teagan," he said hoa.r.s.ely as he pressed against me. "I just needed to get my life in order first. I needed to have something to offer you...a better life than the one you had. I wanted to make you love me so hard you would forget where you started and I ended."

"Mission accomplished," I whispered, barely breathing.

Smiling, Noah slipped inside me in one fluent movement, filling me up. The wetness of our bodies caused the friction inside me to ignite as we slipped and slid against each other.

His hands never left my face and his lips never left my lips as he slowly rocked into me. We barely moved. We just swayed in and out, reveling in being together again as one. Each claiming the other. Showing each other how much this night meant, how pivotal this moment in time was for us. No foreplay. No fooling around.

Tonight was about becoming one again.

HE STOOD NAKED IN THE MIDDLE of the bedroom, the epitome of male virility. With a towel wrapped around his shoulders, he showed no shame, no shyness; he was just completely at ease with who he was and what he looked like. The muscles. The sheer masculine dominance set me on fire. I was excited, tingling, and drooling just watching him do something as mundane as dry himself off.

"You're staring."

"Can you blame me?"

Noah snorted and continued to towel dry his hair.

I waited for him to climb into bed before asking, "What happened here?" His skin was dusted in scars. Some I remembered and some I didn't. I trailed my fingers over the rigid silver line on his ribcage and then to the one just below it.

"Knife wound," he drawled lazily as he laid on his back, allowing me to explore him. "That one too."

"And this?" I whispered, moving lower, resting my palm on the largest welt marking his beautiful body. I felt him shudder beneath my touch. "How did you get this?"

"That's a burn mark, Thorn," he croaked out, covering my hand with his. "From the car crash."

"You were burned that night?" I managed to squeeze out. Memories of the flames around the car Noah and I had been trapped in flooded me and I flinched. "I'm so sorry," I choked out.

"I know you are," he replied and I hoped he was hearing my apology the depth of my remorse. The sadness I felt for where his life had taken him overwhelmed me. He'd been in prison, his mom had died and he'd been all alone for the majority of his life.

"My turn to investigate," he interrupted, obviously not wanting to talk about it.

Rolling me onto my back, Noah rested on his side above me and trailed his fingers over my naked skin. "So soft," he whispered, nudging my belly with his nose. His breath against my skin caused the tingling between my legs to intensify. His eyes darkened when he moved his hand to rest between the apex of my thighs. "What about here?" he whispered, trailing his thumb between my wet folds, circling my c.l.i.t slowly, watching me like a hawk to gage my reaction. "Do you still like it when I touch you here, Thorn?"

"Yes," I whispered, my breath hitching in my throat as I writhed under his touch. I wasn't blessed in the breast department, but when Noah's mouth closed over one, taking my pebbled nipple into his mouth and grunting in appreciation, I forgot all about my insecurities. The feelings he provoked in me were like nothing I'd ever experienced before. It was as if his body had been created for the sole purpose of pleasuring mine. We fit together that perfectly. I wanted to lick him. I knew that sounded crazy and f.u.c.ked up but it was the truth. I wanted to hold his head to my chest and cradle him there, care for him. Nurture him. And then lay on my back and let him do everything I had never allowed another man to do to me.

I wanted to be the one to nurse his wounds, and rub him down after each fight. I wanted to be the woman he had on his arm. I wanted him to want me like I wanted him. It was a deep, carnal want.

He was a real man. Unlike anyone else I'd ever met and I wanted him to possess me, body and soul. I wanted to tie him up in so many knots he would never leave. I loved him that much.

"See the way your body responds to mine," he whispered, kissing each of my b.r.e.a.s.t.s. "It's because you're my mate," he added in an almost desperate tone. s.h.i.+fting so that he was resting above me, Noah pushed my thighs apart and nestled between them. "Your body wants my body, and my heart wants yours," he rasped before filling me in one deep thrust. "We fit together."

Stroking his cheek with my hand, I forced him to look at me as I pressed myself against him, letting him have me, exposing my soul to the man who owned it.

"What are your plans?" he groaned, burying his face in my neck as he plunged inside of me.

"For when?" I gasped, tightening my legs around his hips, as my back arched upwards. "Tomorrow?"

He shook his head. "No, Thorn." I felt him smile against my skin. "For the rest of your life."

I didn't answer him.

I couldn't.

The sensations rus.h.i.+ng through me made it impossible to form a coherent sentence.

So I answered him with kisses, I told him I loved him with my touch, and I promised to never leave him with my tears.