Find Me: Lost And Found Part 4

"It's okay," I said quietly, watching the horse's brown eyes size me up.

She flicked her ears back and forth, and muscles trembled under her skin from her neck down her sides. She was afraid of me.

"Good girl," I said quietly, "It's okay, girl. It's okay. I won't hurt you." I risked bringing my hand up for her to smell and she sniffed it forcefully. I left my palm up, hoping she would allow me to stroke her, and when she lowered her head slightly I gently placed my fingers between her eyes, caressing the flat s.p.a.ce tenderly.

I looked over my shoulder at Connor who had retreated and was once again standing next to Kris, a smile spread out wide across my face. They gave me a little wave, but made no attempt to join me in the middle of the meadow.

"That's a good girl..." I murmured.

The bay s.h.i.+fted her weight between her front feet, breathing loudly through her nostrils as I stroked her and she stepped forward, closing the s.p.a.ce between us. Her lowered head was just in front of me and I brought my other hand up so I could rub both sides of her neck. Everything was going well until with a sudden dip, the mare's head lowered before rising against my chest with a ma.s.sive shove. I was off my feet and on my back instantly, the air exploding from my lungs in one forceful exhale.

Somewhere in the distance was Connor's voice, booming through the forest but it echoed off the trees and only made the ringing in my ears worse. Afraid the horse might trample me, I struggled to lift up on my elbows and raise my head so I knew which way to roll. Struggling to suck oxygen back into my nearly collapsed lungs, I looked up not to find the horse's hooves in my face, but her a.s.s. She stood with her rear facing me, swis.h.i.+ng her tail calmly from side to side, and grazing again. When the air finally came, my throat made an ugly sound as I gulped it down. And I laughed.

"Well played," I said between gulps. She didn't bother to turn to look at me she had made her point. I wasn't in charge of her.

"Jesus, you okay?" Connor's hands were on my shoulders, and though he was a male and a protective one at that, I couldn't help but find it funny that he made no attempt to put himself between me and the horses behind.

"Okay. Just...got the wind...knocked out of me." I sucked in more air and let Connor pull me up to my feet. My ribs weren't broken, but they hurt just as badly.

The palomino grazed her way toward us and stopped to sniff Connor's hair. He bristled as she muzzled against his face, stepping around him to smell his clothes.

"I think she likes you," I laughed at his wide-eyed expression.

"R-right. Let's hope she's not just picking out a good place to bite off a chunk of flesh," he said stoically as the palomino worked her way around the two of us. With a jump, I laughed when she snorted into my hair, sending the loose strands flying about from the heavy gusts of her breathing.

The bay stood watching her friend inspect us with interest. I doubted she truly wanted to injure us, or she would have already, but trusting - she was not. When I clicked my tongue at her, she whinnied and approached cautiously, stomping each of her feet almost as a reminder of what they could do to me if she chose to kick them against my head.

Connor tugged at my wrist as I stepped forward to meet her, but I shrugged him off. "It's okay. She needs to know we're friendly, besides, I don't think she wants to hurt us," I said over my shoulder at him.

"Riley, she just flattened you out. That didn't hurt enough?"

With a sigh, I glanced over my shoulder and smiled faintly at him. "Haven't you been around horses at all? You're from Ireland!"

"Not everyone from b.l.o.o.d.y Ireland rides horses!" he hissed back. His expression changed from irritation to concern as he looked beyond me and I turned around to find the bay's face inches from my own.

She smelled of dirt, gra.s.s, and old manure. Tentatively, I reached up again, placed my palm on the blaze between her eyes, and cautiously rubbed the coa.r.s.e hair until she s.h.i.+fted.

"Riley...don't," Connor said quietly behind me.

I stepped along the side of the horse, running my hand under her tangled mane, across her shoulders and along her back. I patted her gently, returning my hand to her neck, scratching beneath her hair. The palomino was still inspecting Connor's hair and I smiled at him while he patted at the creature's neck.

"See?" I said, as the bay flicked her ears and turned into my scratching hand, "I told you, she just needs time to get to know us, is all."

When the bay turned around to stare at me, I could see the pain and fear that was imprinted in all our gazes. She was scared and just as lost as the rest of us.

"Don't worry girl, we'll take care of you." She sighed and snorted in response, bending down to finish her grazing while I alternated between pats and rubs up and down her side. An idea blurted from my mouth before I had the chance to properly consider it.

"Connor?"

"Yeah?"

"Can you ride?"

CHAPTER six.

"You're crazy! I mean, certifiable, Riley. You can't be serious!" Connor stood with his feet firmly planted in the weedy gra.s.s, staring at me in disbelief. The shoulders of his s.h.i.+rt were covered in damps spots where the palomino had nibbled and nuzzled him. He was lucky the friendly horse hadn't grazed across his head, and trimmed his hair to the roots in the process.

"Think about it, Connor. The horses are pretty much all-terrain. We wouldn't need to worry about fuel or traffic; it makes sense, you know it does!" I stood as tall as my narrow frame would allow with my arms crossed at my chest, willing my face to look determined.

"I think you're nuts, Riley. d.a.m.n crazy," he mumbled into his hands as he dragged them down his face.

"Not to interject, but maybe she has a point," Winchester said. He stood next to the golden mare, his palm resting on her side. "I mean, at least Riley won't be cras.h.i.+ng any bikes, right?" I was the only one that laughed.

The horses had eagerly followed us back to the lodge along the remnants of what used to be a trail leading to the main building. There was no stable on the property, but along the recreation building, was a wooden railing with posts that ran deep into the ground. It was the only place we could think of to keep the horses, but there was no way to contain them.

The bay mare was pretending to ignore us as she nibbled at the plants and gra.s.ses that bordered the trail and the main lawn, but I caught her peering up at me every time I glanced in her direction. Her large, brown eyes seemed hesitant, but willing to trust us. When we made eye contact, she would swish her tail and look back down at the ground to continue her grazing.

"Wait. Just wait," said Jacks, "Look, I've seen Riley ride, I know she can do it. But Riley," he turned to look at me, "Are you saying you want to ride a horse from the mountains of San Diego all the way to the city streets of Los Angeles? I mean, Connor's right...that's just crazy, babe." He put his hands up in the air and looked uncomfortable about picking sides. I tried hard not to glare at him.

"What the heck do you think people did before cars were invented? The bikes will only get us so far and plus, horses are quieter. People would hear us coming from miles away if we took bikes." I propped a fist on my hip and pointed at Connor. "Besides, you said you could ride! Why does this idea bother you so much?"

"I said I could ride! Not that I particularly enjoyed doing it for days at a time! This would be a lot of work, Riley, a lot of work."

"I get that. But what else do we have to do? Is there something better on your schedule for this month?"

Connor and I glared at each other, neither of us willing to be the first to break. It was Skip that jumped in between us and put a hand on each of our shoulders. "Look kids, we don't need to figure this all out today, do we? We don't even know how to keep these beasts from wandering off. Let's just take this one day at a time. Let's go have a drink and relax for a bit. And for G.o.d's sake, someone's got to bathe them...I can't handle the stench for much longer." He crinkled his nose up to prove his point before walking past us, with an anxious Winchester in tow. Jacks shrugged at me and turned to follow the other two men as they made their way down the trail and back to the cabins.

Connor hadn't budged and Kris hadn't left her place next to the palomino, who seemed beyond pleased to have so much attention. The bay was still grazing, seemingly uninterested in the men that had left the group.

"Kris," I said over my shoulder, still looking at Connor's p.i.s.sed expression, "Wanna go for a drive with me; pick up some horse supplies?"

"Yeah! But what about them, do we leave them here?"

"There's rope in the utility closet inside the rec room. I'll get it," I said, finally tearing my eyes from Connor and his flushed cheeks to stomp up the nearby steps.

He was still standing in the same place when I came back with the rope. "This should work, if they'll let me tie them to the post, that is," I said, half under my breath. It was the first time I had ever tied a horse to anything, so I did my best at making the knot secure, without making the loop around their necks too loose. The palomino was completely pliant, allowing me to lead her to the railing and secure her rope to it without as much as a whinny. She resumed grazing at the base of one of the posts, as if she belonged there.

The bay was a different story. She allowed me to loop the rope around her head, but she didn't budge when I tried to lead her to the post. After five minutes of gentle tugging and murmured rea.s.surances, she slowly made her way toward the fencing, loudly protesting with snorts, whinnies, and shakes of her head. Once I was close enough to tie her off, I wasted no time securing her rope to the log-style railing for fear that she might realize what I was doing and bolt - with me still holding onto the rope. An image flashed through my mind of me being dragged down the lodge road, gravel filling my mouth and nose and tearing the flesh from my face.

"Now what?" Connor asked, not bothering to hide the irritation in his voice.

"Now...we find a ranch that has stables and pick up some supplies." I turned from him, beckoning Kris to follow and marched down the trail to the cabins, not bothering to glance behind me to see if Connor was following or not.

After grabbing up the keys to the Jeep, Kris and I returned to the front of the lodge and climbed into the dusty vehicle. We left Connor brooding inside the cabin, alone. Even the dog seemed hesitant to stay with him, so she sat on Kris's lap as we drove down the long and gravelly driveway, turning South on the highway. Plenty of people had owned horses in the area; it was just a matter of finding what we needed and bringing it back.

We struck gold with the first ranch-style property we pulled into. The smell of decay had peaked in June; the heat of summer seemed to dry out the corpses that were in town. The stink there was mostly trapped inside houses, so the smell wasn't as pungent. But the countryside was different on account of all the dead livestock.

Regardless of the rot, the shadows never went away, not completely. It seemed that most of us were plagued by our dreams regardless of where we were, not by the ghosts left behind. Then again, none of us ventured out into previously populated areas of town unless we had to.

As Kris and I stood outside of a barn fit to house at least twenty horses, the only scent in the air was stale hay and dried flowers. And dirt. One of the barn doors was open and as we walked inside, a flutter of wings above us made me jump. A barn owl flew out of the rafters and out the door with a loud screech.

"Ouch," I said under my breath, grimacing at the bruises Kris was leaving in my arm.

"I'm sorry!" she said, releasing me. She gently rubbed at the spot where she had clamped on to me when the bird burst out of its nest.

"It's okay," I laughed, "It got me too."

The inside of the barn was poorly lit but after we stood still for a moment and let our eyes adjust, we could see well enough to look around the place. It took almost half an hour to find what I thought we needed. A few side pulls, extra rope, two shedding tools and an almost full gallon of horse shampoo. Kris found saddle blankets and carried them out to the Jeep.

"What about hay? Don't horses eat hay?" she asked as I dumped the supplies into the back seat. Zoey rushed in and out of the barn, nosing around the stable doors. I refused to look inside them. The smell of death lingered inside the stalls and I had no desire to see decaying horses.

"Uh, yeah. But, obviously these two were eating what they could find. Hey, look at that." I pointed to the side of the barn, at the truck that was parked in the weeds, a horse trailer fixed to the fifth wheel.

"The trailer?" Kris asked as I walked away from her.

"If it works, we could fill the back with hay. Maybe the horses will sleep in here till we figure out what to do with them."

"Can you drive that?"

"If there are keys...probably."

She stood with her arms crossed, leaning against the weathered wood wall of the barn as I inspected the vehicle. The horse-trailer was unlocked, and relatively clean on the inside. The truck was unlocked as well, but the keys weren't in plain sight.

"No keys," I said with a sigh, as I climbed back out of the driver seat.

"Now what? You going in the house?"

Kris didn't enter houses. She would climb fruit trees or scale fences to pick through over-grown gardens, but any time we needed supplies that we could only find indoors, she always waited in the car. She swore the ghost of a dead man had kissed her cheek once as she pilfered through a downstairs bathroom. She had run from the house screaming and crying, and vowed to leave the indoor gathering to the rest of us from that point on. I didn't blame her. I didn't much enjoy wandering through the houses of dead people either, stealing their canned foods, toilet paper and batteries.

"I'm not sure. Wasn't there a little office inside the barn?"

"Yeah, but it's like the size of a closet. I didn't see any keys in there either," she answered.

"We weren't looking for keys earlier, come on." The dry wind pushed against us as we rounded the corner of the building, causing dust to fly up in our faces.

"Yuck!" Kris spat as we rushed back inside the barn.

I swiped at my face with my s.h.i.+rtsleeve, rubbing the dirt off my lips. The wind had been picking up and the temperature was high during the day.

"d.a.m.n Santa Ana weather," I mumbled.

We trudged to the far side of the barn where a small room was tucked in the corner next to several large barrels. A few tools that I didn't know the names of hung from the walls, as well as a few framed pictures of prize-winning horses. Other than a small office chair and wobbly wooden desk, a four-drawer metal cabinet was the only other furniture in the room.

I sifted through the small wicker basket that sat atop the cabinet, finding loose keys, bolts and thumbtacks. No truck keys. Papers were strewn about the desk in lumps, as if someone had sifted through them. I pushed them aside into a pile, finding nothing but a bottle opener beneath the mess.

"Check the drawer," Kris said from behind me.

One thin drawer ran the length of the table and inside I found not only one set, but also two sets of keys, including a dusty Playboy magazine from the nineties. The cover had been flipped open enough times that the spine was completely pliant, bending freely. Soft wrinkles and bends covered every inch of the magazine, but it was otherwise in great condition.

"Someone must have liked this edition," I said with a laugh, raising it up for Kris to see the blonde model on the front, expertly hiding her private areas with her long hair and hands. The disgusted look on Kris's face made me laugh harder and I tossed the magazine back into the desk, pus.h.i.+ng the drawer shut. The Playboy would be sealed in there, forever. However long forever ended up being.

We were covered in dust and smelled like old hay and horse and not in a good way. Instead of getting used to the smell of the dead animals, my nose seemed to have a harder time processing the sickly-sweet odor of the barn the longer we stayed inside it.

As we walked toward the exit, the morbid side of my curiosity won and I went up on my toes to look over one of the stall gates. I flinched back in horror, covering my mouth with the back of my hand and nearly stumbled over a felled pitchfork.

"What? What is it?" Kris asked.

I shook my head from side to side, not sure of what I saw, but certain I didn't want to see it again. "I-I don't know."

Before I could reach out and stop her, Kris stepped forward and gripped the stall door, going up on her toes, just as I had, to peer over the side. "No, Kris - wait!" It was too late. She recoiled from the gate, covering her face with her hands.

"I want to go - I don't want to be in here anymore!" she said, taking no time to wait for me as she stumbled away from the stalls and back outside, into the fresh air.

Zoey stood from her resting spot beside one of the Jeep tires, watching us with a worried expression. She had also stopped going inside houses and structures she didn't know. Her canine senses couldn't take the rancid stimuli.

We leaned against the Jeep, staring at the barn with the single open door that almost resembled a mouth. So much death. Everything had died. Well, not everything.

"What do you think did that?" Kris whispered, wiping clear snot from her leaking nose.

I glanced at her before returning my attention back at the barn. "I don't know...some sort of large animal, I guess."

"Think it might still be around here, watching us or something?" Her eyes darted over the empty gra.s.s fields that surrounded the barn and up the hill that led to the main house.

"No. I doubt it, sweetie. Whatever...did that...well, it'll be long gone by now." I smiled rea.s.suringly but did my own visual inspection of our surroundings before pus.h.i.+ng off the Jeep and walking back to the trailer. I didn't want her to see my face. To see the doubt that I knew lingered there. The horse had been mauled to pieces; torn limb from limb and partially devoured. All except for the head - which sat picked clean on a bench facing the stall door. No sane animal had placed it there.

"What are we going to name them?" Kris asked as she pulled handfuls of hay out of the back of the open horse trailer I had parked on the lodge lawn, dumping them into a pile on the gra.s.sy ground. Tufts of the dry strands stuck to the ends of her curled hair and across her shoulders, almost making her look as if the stuff had been dumped over her head.

"Hmmm. Well, you were the one who found them first, why don't you pick?" I smiled at her face as it split nearly in half from a grin she didn't display often enough.

"Okay. Lemme think," she murmured against the friendly palomino's neck as she greedily dove into the hay pile - muzzle first. "Well, this one is super sweet and her gold coat makes me think of suns.h.i.+ne. Is 'Sunny' too corny?" she asked me.

"I think that's perfect," I leaned across Kris's shoulder and scratched the palomino's ear, "I think you look like a Sunny. How's that sound to you?" I asked the horse. She twitched her ear, but didn't stop eating.

"And the bay? What should we name her?"

Kris crinkled up her nose at the larger and much darker-colored horse. "She doesn't like me."

"She doesn't like anyone...yet," I laughed.