Emperor Of Blue Flower Mountain 49 Volume 2: Don't Leave Me

"Shan Hui blames himself for making you angry."

"Ah..! I forgot about him." She made a face and then shrugged. "He shouldn't have lied either. As long as he apologies for his part, then that's fine."

"I'm sure he's happy to hear that."

"Don't you mean he WILL BE happy to hear that?"

"Oh no, he's been eavesdropping for a while now."

Mei Hua shot up from her seat and glared around fiercely even though she couldn't see her son. He'd always been the sneaky sort, so not seeing him didn't mean he wasn't there.

"Shan Hui, I didn't beat you for lying, but don't think I won't beat you for eavesdropping! Scram!"

Jin tilted his head, a smirk pa.s.sing over his lips before his wife could see.

"He left."

"That boy," Her shoulders slumped as she sat back down. "Eavesdropping on his own parents… How did he grow up this way? Did I fail as a mother?"

Jin patted his wife on the shoulder.

"Mountain Flower, it's not you. He takes too much after me. Far too much after me."

She raised an eyebrow.

"It's not as though you're his only parent. And you say that like it's a bad thing he takes after you."

"Isn't it?"

Her eyes twinkled with repressed laughter, "Of course not. Yes, he can be a schemer and he behaves like a naughty little boy sometimes, but he's also loyal and smart. In that way, he's very like you. And that he reminds me of you is part of why I love him."

"Are you insulting us or praising us?"

Mei Hua tucked her hands under her chin and grinned impishly.

"Both."

He gave her a petulant glare which caused her to finally laugh.

"Is that how an Emperor is suppose to act?" She teased as he continued pouting.

A solitary eyebrow rose and he said with feigned dignity, "Any way I act is how an Emperor's suppose to behave, naturally."

"Ho ho, is that so? I think there are some Emperors in the world who'd disagree."

He snorted. "As if anything mortal Emperors have to say is worth hearing."

She tilted her head, brows furrowed. "Speaking of mortality… how long will that body of yours last?"

Jin rubbed his chin as he thought.

"I'm not sure. But it will be a very long time, I think. Long enough that, at some point, I will lose count of the years I've been in it, and perhaps forget what it was like to be a spirit without a body."

"Wow, so immortal for all intents and purposes then."

He gave a slight nod and noticed a complicated expression cross her face.

"Does that make you unhappy?"

"…not exactly. It's just that, when I die—"

He grabbed her arms, pulling her to face him, and spat out, "You won't die!"

"Jin, I'm human, some day I must die."

"No! I won't allow it." His eyes were blazing gold and his hands shook slightly. "Mei, as long as I'm here, I won't let you die."

"C-can you do that?"

"I can, as long as you stay with me, stay on these mountains, I can keep you alive." He embraced her roughly, breathing heavily, and stroking her hair to a.s.sure himself. "You.. You won't leave, will you?"

"Jin, how many times must I tell you I won't leave until you believe me?" She was getting vexed with his insecurity.

Seeing that his clinginess was annoying her, and it wasn't good to antagonize her when she was pregnant, he pulled himself together and took on a contrite posture and tone.

"Sorry."

"You should be! Goodness! I'm carrying your fourth child and you still act like I'm just going to waltz right off the mountain any day. What do you take me for, huh?" She poked him viciously.

"A most virtuous wife." He could only nod and take it like a good husband.

"Exactly! Haven't I been good to you all these years? Haven't I remained loyal? Haven't I cooked and cleaned and raised your children? Haven't I?" She was still poking him.

"Of course you have!"

"That's right. So. Don't go talking about me leaving again. Next time I'll knock you a good one for it."

Even though she was glaring and her tone sounded mean, Jin felt moved. He hugged her again, this time gently without the desperation and gave her little kisses on the top of her head. They stayed like that for some time.

"Anyway," She finally slid out of his arms with a sigh. "I suppose we should get back. I'm sure everyone wondering what's taking so long."

He nodded and held out his hand. She clasped his hand and gave a small smile. They walked through the ruins together in companionable silence.

"Jin."

"Yes?"

"Let's make a memorial stone for the children. The ones that didn't make it, I mean."

"Of course."

"I-if I lose more, we'll add tablets for them."

"Mei."

"Hm?"

"You will lose more."

Seeing his resolute but anxious expression, she knew he'd no doubts in his word.

"Is it… is it me that's causing…?"

"No!" He spun to look at her, saying earnestly, "Don't blame yourself. It's me. I'm… I'm not all human. Our children… they're not all human either. The ones that don't make it… they die because they're not a proper blend of either of us. I can't save them without… without creating something unnatural."

"Unnatural?"

"Yes, something that's more like a fairy and less like a human."

"Oh?" She did not quite understand why that was bad. She had lived with Ye for most of her life, with Jin for the next bit, and now had her sons. Her little family had always been odd, so adding to the oddness made no difference. It was why the thought of them being half-mountain spirit did not really bother her at all.

"How to explain…?" He muttered before continuing. "It.. It may seem hard to believe, but once I was a pure, good spirit of the mountain. Untainted and wise. Yet even I… look what happened? Even without a disposition for selfishness, see how foolish and greedy I became? Now imagine how a human behaves by nature, filled with the desires of the world the moment they're born, having all the power of the mountain at their fingertips without having to earn any of it."

He rubbed the back of his neck worriedly. "One such child like that I could teach and discipline. I could keep him in line. But two or more? G.o.ds help me if they were twins! I would be over powered. They would become monsters, calamities, without anyone to restrain them. They would be like the Devils talked about in those religious texts written by humans. And I can not risk that. Not when it could mean destroying you and the world that made you."

Her eyes got very round as he explained.

"Is it really that dangerous?"

"It really is that dangerous."

"Then I won't ask you to do something dangerous to save them. Ev—even though I want them to live, I don't want them to… to be monsters." She frowned and then looked at him hopefully. "You said you can deal with at least one?"

He squinted at her. "I'm already dealing with one."

"Ah…" She looked down for a moment and then realized. "Shan Hui."

He gave a slight nod.

"…so that's why he's so much like you."

"En. In more than one way."

"He's a good boy."

"Because he loves you."

"Are you saying if he didn't—?"

"He would be almost exactly like a devil."

"That… I don't believe that."

He touched her cheek with the back of his fingers.

"It's fine if you don't, but believe me when I say he can be the only one."

She nodded sadly.

"Mei, let's go home." Jin opened his arms, and she stared at his face searchingly. This was the face of the Emperor… How very strange! How many years had she spent in reverential fear of this person? It seemed so silly now.

"What?" He asked anxiously as she continued to stare, his arms still awkwardly open and waiting. Mei Hua's eyes turned to crescents as she laughed and walked into his embrace. "Is my face that funny?"

Hugging him tightly, her face buried in his chest, she replied, "No, no… actually you're really handsome."

"Hm… I know."

She pinched his back viciously.

"Owe, owe! Woman you're the one who said it first!"

"Even an Emperor should be modest."

He mumbled poutingly, "…you're so moody when you're pregnant."

"…what was that?"

"Ah. I didn't say anything?"

"You did."

"Did not!"

"Didn't you just say you wouldn't lie to me?" This time she pinched him with both hands.

Jin immediately let her go, dancing slightly from the pain on his back. He gave her a "Why me?" look before saying sourly, "Now Mountain Flower don't over react—"

She balled her hand into a fist and shook it at him. "Who's over reacting?!"

"No one! Not you, most definitely!" His face broke out in a light sweat, immediately realizing his error.

"That's right!" She rushed forward and grappled him roughly, eventually getting him in a headlock. After several minutes of struggle he gave up, his hands hanging listlessly below him, hair a mess. She lifted his head-locked face up to her own and kissed him on the cheek. Giving him an impish smile, she said, "Like you said, let's go home."