Creatures Of Habit Chapter 4

In the bathroom, Qin Shaocheng lifted his wet forelocks, revealing his clean forehead. Hot water flowed down his firm muscles. His desire had not completely subsided. When he closed his eyes, he could picture the body of Jiang Yishan and hear his moans.

Qin Shaocheng felt regret and hit the wall with his fist.

After was.h.i.+ng, he pushed the door open, and he saw Jiang Yishan standing outside with only a thin s.h.i.+rt on. Qin Shaocheng had a cold look on his face, but Jiang Yishan still hugged his shoulder and gave him a smile. “Can you hold me?”

Qin Shaocheng shrugged him off with a wave of his hand.

“You’re still ignoring me?” Jiang Yishan frowned. “Why won’t you talk to me?”

Jiang Yishan couldn’t understand why Qin Shaocheng turned out like this. When he saw the hesitation and struggle in Qin Shaocheng’s eyes, he thought he had a chance. However, all his b.u.t.tering up didn’t seem to yield even half the effect he wanted.

He missed Qin Shaocheng so much. He wanted to talk to him and hug him. Jiang Yishan’s heart was sour. In the past, Qin Shaocheng loved him very much.1 Now, did he not like it when Jiang Yishan took the initiative?

Did he not like it when he’s wearing his s.h.i.+rt?

Did he not like him anymore? 2

But he could not ask him these questions. At least, not now, when Qin Shaocheng was still angry.

When Qin Shaocheng had to go, Jiang Yishan couldn’t bear it. “I know you’re still angry with me, which is why you treat me like a stranger. But please, don’t treat me as an enemy, okay?”

Listening to him speak in a low voice, Qin Shaocheng’s jaw tensed. “What do you want?”

“I just want to see you and talk to you.”

“And then, what? Ask for money? Or let me intercede with the boss who offended you?”

“I don’t have such intentions.” Jiang Yishan frowned.

Qin Shaocheng said with exasperation, “Jiang Yishan, you said the same thing four years ago.”

“I really don’t!”

Jiang Yishan was anxious. He made a lot of mistakes in the past, and now he wished that he could turn back the clock and set things right. He grabbed Qin Shaocheng’s arm: “I was wrong, I know this now. I really just want to see you. I miss you too much.”

“You missed me?” Qin Shaocheng sneered. “Why didn’t you miss me in the last two years?”

“I…”

Qin Shaocheng turned to look at him. “If you were not desperate and had nowhere else to go, would you have come back to me?”

Jiang Yishan was tongue-tied. He had been preoccupied with how popular he was, and had no courage to come back even though he had thought about it. This time, because of the exposure of his s.e.xuality and the collapse of the performing arts industry, the people around him left him. Only then did he realize how important Qin Shaocheng was to him.

He felt guilty. Even now, he didn’t have the face to apologize to Qin Shaocheng. He was afraid of seeing Qin Shaocheng’s look of disgust if he came to say sorry.

“I know.” Jiang Yishan said. “I know I was wrong…”

Qin Shaocheng did not believe his words at all: “Or did you hear that I was going back to the Qin family, so you were brazen? Want to coax me to help you pave the way again?”

Jiang Yishen was stunned. “What?”

Qin Shaocheng pushed him. “You quickly give me away.”

“You speak clearly. You want to go back?” Jiang Yishan pulled Qin Shaocheng back. “You want to go back to the Qin family?”

At this moment, Jiang Yishan panicked. He finally understood why Qin Shaocheng, a soft-hearted man, was so hard-hearted that he seemed to be a different person. What happened to his relations.h.i.+p with the Qin family was Jiang Yishan’s fault.3

“I don’t know anything!” Jiang Yishan firmly grasped Qin Shaocheng’s wrist. “I admit, I didn’t say anything before to soften your heart! I just want–I swear, I had no idea you were going back.”

Qin Shaocheng’s eyes were indifferent.

Jiang Yishan broke out into cold sweat. He thought Qin Shaocheng must have misunderstood him. Qin Shaocheng must’ve thought that he had come to seek peace because he knew he was going back. No, that’s not it. Although he did not think of his lover until he had nothing, he also knew what he had done wrong these years. He only wanted to be with Qin Shaocheng again. He had no other intentions.

Jiang Yishan panicked. “I know I was wrong. Shaocheng, please, don’t go.”

“Don’t go?” Qin Shaocheng looked at him deeply. “Don’t you remember what you told me before?”

Jiang Yishan turned pale.

“Do you really think that you have a dog?” Qin Shaocheng squeezed out the words through gritted teeth before walking to his bedroom.

Jiang Yishan watched him walk away, but he still didn’t have any courage to run after him.

He and Qin Shaocheng first met at a party. At that time, Jiang Yishan had just joined a talent show and he was really famous. At the age of only seventeen or eighteen, he already looks good. Standing on the stage, he attracted a lot of people’s attention.

Qin Shaocheng fell in love with him at first sight.

Jiang Yishan wasn’t gay, so he didn’t promise anything at first. However, the handsome and rich Qin Shaocheng relentlessly pursued him. Not to mention that Qin Shaocheng was really generous with his money. Jiang Yishan came from an ordinary working-cla.s.s family. When he saw the blossoming world of the rich, he was almost tempted. His mind became uncertain. Not long after, he rolled in the sheets with Qin Shaocheng.

After they got together, the Qin family strongly opposed it. Jiang Yishan had just gotten an invitation from a brokerage company. In order to stay with Jiang Yishan, Qin Shaocheng left home and came to A city with him.

As Jiang Yishan officially entered the entertainment industry, he gradually found that it was much darker than he had imagined. He was a teenager with high self-esteem and a little arrogance. He offended many people, causing their hearts to turn black. Most of the people in the circle treat others according to their status and relations.h.i.+p with them.4 Jiang Yishan’s career development was very bad.

On the contrary, Qin Shaocheng, a wealthy young master, patiently accompanied him through the difficult times. He did not forget to spoil him even when he was too busy in starting a company from scratch. It was then that Jiang Yishan really fell in love with him. The two were in a sweet relations.h.i.+p for nearly a year.

Later, he became popular for guest appearances in a variety show. In the same night, he experienced the feeling of being hailed by thousands of people. His songs were all on the streets and lanes. The top singer with the greatest number of downloads in the ringtone list was his name for three months. The ensuing reputation and money he gained were inexhaustible.

Jiang Yishan became reckless.5 Qin Shaocheng had advised him to keep a low-profile at that time, but he was too impetuous to listen.

Then someone took a picture of him and Qin Shaocheng kissing.

He was really embarra.s.sed. Just when he was willing to get everything he wanted, someone found out about his relations.h.i.+p.6

At the bar, he was forced to drink a strong liquor mix, which damaged his voice. The investor laughed at him and thought that he would have nothing to worry about since he was holding the thigh of a rich family. But what if he didn’t have the backing of the young man at home?

When the brokerage company found out that his voice was damaged, they advised him to either quit or break up with Qin Shaocheng as soon as possible. Because of the relations.h.i.+p with the Qin family, Qin Shaocheng would have nothing to lose.

Jiang Yishan was blinded by vanity. Between his future and his lover, he chose the former.

But with a few years of affection, how could breaking up be easy? Qin Shaocheng thought that Jiang Yishan was put in a terrible position and had to decide.7 He couldn’t be completely indifferent, so he tried to save it.

Because of Jiang Yishan’s bad voice, many singing programs were no longer available to him. He can only rely on spending money to make a profit. All his savings had been spent to buy photographs. He had to ask Qin Shaocheng for money.

However, the popularity brought by the speculation of his s.e.xuality was not enough to get him a lot of good resources. He began to be unsatisfied. He paid a lot of online ghostwriters to write the right black material8 about him so he can ride along the waves brought by the gossips.Unfortunately, in doing so, he offended a background investor, and he had no choice but to think of the words of the investors who forced him to drink.

Jiang Yishan finally committed a grave mistake.

He asked Qin Shaocheng, who had broken off relations with his family, to go back and ask his family to lend him some resources to help him.

He trampled his lover’s self-esteem on the ground.

Thinking in this place, Jiang Yishan, who was wearing only a thin s.h.i.+rt, s.h.i.+vered in the cold. Looking at the closed door again, he gnawed his fingers anxiously and recalled what Qin Shaocheng just said. He was really disappointed with himself.

Jiang Yishan felt even colder at this point.

The more ups and downs he had in the circle, the more he regretted not cheris.h.i.+ng Qin Shaocheng’s sincerity. He knew he was wrong, and it was hard for him to muster up the courage to make up for it. He came back with the hope that Qin Shaocheng would accept him. But he was too late. Qin Shaocheng was leaving.

Jiang Yishan absentmindedly bit on his finger. He didn’t even feel the pain. He kept thinking about Qin Shaocheng returning to his family. Once he returned, everything between them would be truly over. He wandered aimlessly around the room, looking across the bathroom and staring at the shower. He stepped forward and turned on the switch. The cold water pouring over him made him tremble.

He had always been mean and selfish. As long as Qin Shaocheng had a soft heart, he would use it to death.

Translator’s Notes:

1  以前秦紹晟都是很心疼他的 Return ▲

Baidu offers two translations for this sentence. The first one is “Before, Qin Shaocheng was very distressed by him,” and the second is “Qin Shaocheng used to love him very much.” As you can see, these two are completely opposite, so now I have no idea what the heck it’s supposed to mean. However, the second translation made more sense, so I went with that one.

2  他想問秦紹晟不喜歡自己主動了嗎？不喜歡自己穿他的襯衫了嗎？不喜歡自己了嗎？ Return ▲

Both Baidu and Google gave me translations where Jiang Yishan was asking Qin Shaocheng, “Don’t you like wearing his s.h.i.+rt? Don’t you like yourself?” The POV of the question didn’t seem right, so I changed it.

3  和秦家相關的事情是他們之間最大的溝壑。

Return ▲

I think this sentence contains an idiom. The character 壑 (hè) found at the end of the sentence literally means gully or ravine, so Baidu translated it as “What is related to the Qin family is the biggest gully between them.” And it made no sense at all, so I did some extra research and found 3 Chinese idioms that contain the 壑 character, and then tried to whack my brain with what the sentence could possibly mean. I may be close to the actual meaning or way off ¯_(ツ)_/¯

4  圈裡人又多是看碟下菜之人 Return ▲

Possibly another sentence with an idiom. It says that “most people in the circle are those who watch dishes.”

5  他開始飄飄然 Return ▲

Literally translated as “He began to float.”

6  正當紅的他哪裡捨得如今到手的一切，他各種找人托關係。 Return ▲

Baidu and Google gave me some very confusing translations, so I did my best to rephrase it.

7  秦紹晟想他是身處風口浪尖不得不做的決定，於是盡力挽回 Return ▲

Baidu gave me something like “a decision had to be made at the top of the storm,” while Google says, “it was a decision that had to be made at the cusp,” and I’m just ???

From how I understood it, the sentence has something to do with “Qin Shaocheng” being a transitionary choice for Jiang Yishan’s road to either fame or failure. But I just don’t get why the sentence was in QSC’s point of view. Anyways, I did my best to rephrase it, so it reads more smoothly.

8  又去幹買對家黑料、搞水軍帶節奏那套。 Return ▲

Literally means: “He also went to buy the right black material and set up the water army with rhythm.” According to Baike, black material is “the negative news about the star, the news that broke its image,” etc. Meanwhile, water army, according to Wikipedia, is a “group of Internet ghostwriters in China who are paid to post online comments with particular content.”