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What makes me so special that I'd need to introduce myself as such? Well, you see... Not too long ago, during my daily routine of being yet another useless member of society, I was sucked into my favourite JRPG video game: Veronicle. It's not the worst thing that could ever happen to me, but...
See, I usually spend my days either in front of a computer monitor, my face a complete deadpan of emotionless flesh, or with a translated paperback light novel glued to my eyes.
That's it.
I actually don't do much more than that.
Maybe, if I need to, I'll go visit the local shopping centre to buy new JRPGs or light novels. That happens rarely, as it's easy enough to shop online via websites such as 'Jungle.com' or 'cBay'. Oh, that feel when technology makes your life easier than it needs to be!
Don't get me wrong, though! I couldn't make it to be 25 years old, living on my own in an apartment complex, if I were just some lazy good-for-nothing! I have to make money somehow! The only difference is that I don't go out into the city, like everyone else, to make my money...
How do I do it, then?
I live-stream myself playing JRPGs as they come out!
You'd be surprised at how many people are willing to watch you play games. They even go as far as to give you money, if they think you're funny or good at a game! Fortunately, because I don't have to waste half my day going to work, I've honed my skills at JRPGs through the years.
Actually, I'm pretty sure people just like watching me fail when I play. I don't know. Maybe it gets them off.
Normally, if you're playing a JRPG, you'd think it were just another casual single-player game. It might have a great story-line, where the MC bands with quirky adventurers, to go off and defeat the Final Boss. It might take you hours of grinding, or a quick trip over the 'Sacred Mountain' to find that magical sword, but that's generally the way those type of JRPG go.
That kind of game is boring. No. I live-stream JRPG that are hardcore! These t.i.tles are infamous for being ruthless toward their players - killing them at every other corner. Throwing absolutely impossible missions at the players until they become so frustrated that they'll smash their game controllers in anger, or snap their keyboards in half!
The games I play are t.i.tles like 'Dark Spirits', or 'Mughead'. I'll even try to dig out the diamonds in the rough, and find games such as 'Super Beef Boy', or 'I Wanna Be the Man'.
Like I said: I'm pretty sure people just like watching me fail when I play.
Out of all the cripplingly frustrating JRPG t.i.tles that I play, my favourite JRPG is 'Veronicle'.
When 'Veronicle' first released in XX16, I was only 23 years old. It was highly antic.i.p.ated to be one of the most daring JRPG releases of the century! Development leaks showed the game testers becoming so angry at the game that they'll jump out of their seats and punch their computer monitors. There was even a video on WhoTube that showed one of the game testers crying in the corner, having repeated a certain part of the game over 100 times in a row.
Needless to say, I rose to the impossible challenge that would end up consuming two years of my life.
Back to the main subject, though! I've suddenly been sucked into Veronicle's world, centered around the continent of 'Riveria'. It's a beautiful land, full of mystical beings such as fairies and magical animals. The trees won't only have green leaves, but might have completely different colours altogether. The wind carries the roar of the rus.h.i.+ng rivers, as it breathes through the forests, and over the plains.
It's all serene. The smell of the gra.s.s, and the swaying of the flowers, make you feel at peace with yourself.
That is... until you realise that you have no way to defend yourself against the numerous beasts trying to kill you as soon as they see you.
If I were somehow sucked into Veronicle, and found myself starting the same way that the MC does, then it might still be alright. I'd at least be able to eventually figure out how to proceed, based off of how it starts in the video game. My situation? Well... I ended up a little further away from the cell in the dark dungeon, and found myself in a field of gra.s.s.
There's no half-dead body carrying a sword to take, nor a random higher being popping out of thin air to guide me. Open up the game menu and access the map? I didn't even have a fold-up paper map! I was literally sucked into the game, and just dumped in any random place.
Cut to: I'm running through the gra.s.s field, trying to get away from a wild boar twice my size. I had only taken a few steps, then I hear a 'SNORT SNORT' behind me, and it's a mammoth pig getting ready to charge at me! I only just managed to roll out of the way, but the mini-earthquake that rumbled beside me nearly made me p.i.s.s myself.
It didn't take long for the wild boar to run me out of the gra.s.s field, and I found myself sprinting down a man-made road. I didn't even realise that the boar had stopped chasing me - there was no way I was going to just stop to check!
Eventually, having destroyed my heart from the sudden out-of-place cardio, I fell face-first onto the brick pavement. My heavy panting, where I didn't even have the energy to swallow my spit, left me drooling in a daze. I really thought I was going to die.
Poke poke.
"Oh no," I had thought at that time. I even closed my eyes, ready to give up on life. "The pig's got me! It's poking me with its tusks."
Poke poke.
"s.h.i.+t! If you're going to eat me, then eat me! Stop poking me in the sides, you fat piece of s.h.i.+t!"
"Who's a piece of s.h.i.+t, you mongrel?!"
I opened my eyes to see two men holding spears - or pitchforks? - looking at the me that was sprawled out on the floor like roadkill. They were wearing clothes that Veronicle NPCs usually wore: single-colour tunics, some kind of woolen leggings, and leather boots that went up to just below the knees.
"Get up, you dying dog," the one that had been poking me said. "The King's road isn't for people to sleep on."
"Go on," the other man added. "Get going. You're in the way of our cart."
I wouldn't be able to tell you what happened next. The me that never exercised, or did any kind of running around, pa.s.sed out after that.
But yep! That's how I came to the world of Veronicle, in the continent of 'Riveria'. That is why I'm special enough to need an introduction as such! If only that were the end of it all...
When I pa.s.sed out, that's when something more expected happened to me: I could see some kind of a User Interface!
⌈ STATUS
Theodore Young
JOB: Villager
LVL: 1 EXP: 0/10 ⏌
⌈ SKILLS
• Blessed by G.o.ddess LVL∞ • Item Box LVL1
• Smithing LVL1 • Woodwork LVL1
• Cooking LVL1 • Cleaning LVL1 ⏌
...
That's it? Wait! What kind of skills are these?! Where's 'Sword Mastery' and 'Magic'?!
That's what you're thinking, right? I know. I thought the exact same thing.
I'm just another villager.