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HAUSER. It may be possible that ...
BEERMANN. It is not at all possible. My name is there. Shall I quietly sit and wait until I am ruined? You know that I would be ruined if it became public. Fancy, I, the candidate for the Reichstag; I, the President of the Society for the Suppression of Vice! All the papers would be full of it.
HAUSER. Oh, yes, it would be quite interesting.
BEERMANN. Then think of the consequences here in the City! In the family! Why, I would be killed outright! Lord, how I tried to hammer it into the head of that stupid man in the Police Department so he could understand what terrible mischief this will make.
HAUSER [frightened]. You went to Police Headquarters?
BEERMANN. Of course, I was there.
HAUSER. Did you confess?
BEERMANN. How can you suppose that? [Sits down again.] I spoke for the others. I explained to the official that he is showing up the influential element; that he is injuring the established order of society,--but [he touches his forehead with his palm] that fellow has nothing but police ordinances in his head.
HAUSER. Shouting will not help us a bit. Remain cool and collected. One thing is important, at this moment. Has the diary reached the District Attorney's office?
BEERMANN. No, it has not.
HAUSER. Well, as long as it remains in the Police Department there are still possibilities.
BEERMANN. It is not in the Police Department either.
HAUSER. Of course it is there. Where else should it be?
BEERMANN [indicating his side pocket]. Here.
HAUSER [amazed]. What?
BEERMANN [takes the diary out of his side pocket and places it on the table]. Here it is.
HAUSER. So, this is the celebrated diary of Madame Hauteville. [Beermann nods.] Who gave it to you?
BEERMANN. n.o.body. I just took it.
HAUSER. You mean; you sto ...
BEERMANN.... Stole it, yes, sir.
HAUSER [pulls back his chair and breaks into a loud laugh]. You did that! [He laughs.] ... Say, that's pretty good. Now I am beginning to respect you. Confound it, I would never have given you credit for a stunt like this. [He laughs and slaps his knee.]
BEERMANN. Laugh, while I am dying of fright.
HAUSER. Don't spoil my good impression of you! I am on the point of admiring you. [He laughs again.] Let me apologize. I always held you as a wishy-washy bourgeois and now you go and pull this thing off.
BEERMANN. You had better give me some advice. I have not had a quiet moment since I took the book. I want to destroy it but how can I? If I tear it up the pieces will be found.
HAUSER. Burn it.
BEERMANN. Where? There is no fire in the house, except in the kitchen range. If I hide it, I shall always have to run to and fro to see if it is there, and I feel less safe if I have it on my person. Then I have always a feeling as though that thing were bulging out my pocket; and the police must be missing it by this time.
HAUSER. Oh, tear out the page on which your name appears and send it back anonymously.
BEERMANN. Impossible. My name appears on almost every second page.
HAUSER. Oh ... so.
BEERMANN. What shall I do when the police ask me for the book?
HAUSER. There is only one way; you know nothing about it.
BEERMANN. But they will be dead certain that I have it.
HAUSER. Remain firm. For Heaven's sake don't fall into the trap that by confessing you will improve this fine job. [A loud and prolonged ringing of the electric bell is heard.]
BEERMANN [frightened, exclaims]. There, do you hear that?
HAUSER. Some visitor, I suppose.
BEERMANN. This is no time to make visits. [Anxiously picking up the diary.] What shall I do with the d.a.m.ned thing? [Takes out a volume of the encyclopedia and wants to hide the diary in it but hesitates, and then puts the volume back on the shelf.] Lord, where shall I put it?
HAUSER. Come, give it to me.
BEERMANN [Gives him the book and Hauser puts it in his side pocket.]
HAUSER. No one will search me for it.
BEERMANN. Stay here with me ... please.
HAUSER. If it gives you any pleasure, yes; but man alive, pull yourself together. Suppose it really were the police; you are trembling all over.
[A knock on the door.]
BEERMANN [crouching]. Quiet now. [Another knock.] Come in. [Betty comes in from the left and hands Beermann a visiting card.]
BETTY. The gentleman says it is very urgent.
BEERMANN [with a trembling hand Beermann takes up the visiting card and reads]. Professor Wasner. [He sighs audibly and then says with forced vigor.] Show the gentleman up. [Betty exit.]
BEERMANN. And this has been my state of mind for the past six hours.
HAUSER [offering him his hand]. Now be brave, my dear friend, and even if they should come to you, just deny it outright. You'll know how to lie. A man of such rare abilities.... Good night. [Goes out on the left. In the doorway, he almost collides with Professor Wasner. They greet each other.]
WASNER [wears a cape the left corner thrown picturesquely over his right shoulder, holds a large slouch hat in his hand. His hair is disheveled.
His flaxen beard falls on his chest]. I am here in regard to the most remarkable matter a man ever came to consult another about.
BEERMANN [very nervous]. Must it be today, Herr Professor?
WASNER. The situation permits of no delay.