A Siren - BestLightNovel.com
You’re reading novel A Siren Part 25 online at BestLightNovel.com. Please use the follow button to get notification about the latest chapter next time when you visit BestLightNovel.com. Use F11 button to read novel in full-screen(PC only). Drop by anytime you want to read free – fast – latest novel. It’s great if you could leave a comment, share your opinion about the new chapters, new novel with others on the internet. We’ll do our best to bring you the finest, latest novel everyday. Enjoy
The Marchese was startled and utterly taken aback for a minute or two.
He was genuinely at a loss to interpret the cause or the meaning of the lady's emotion. His puzzled embarra.s.sment did not, however, prevent him from seeing that she looked, if possible, more fascinatingly beautiful in her grief and her tears than he had ever before seen her. And, again, despite what she had said, he knelt down by the side of the sofa, and gently removing her hands from before her face, murmured in her ear,--"Bianca, what is it--what is moving you so? Don't you know that you are dear to me;--that I would--Don't you know that I would do anything to be agreeable to you rather than give you any sorrow or pain?
What is there within my power that I would not do? Bianca,--let me tell you--let me speak the truth--I cannot keep it in my own heart any longer--I love you! You have come to be all that I care for in the world. Bianca, do you hear me? For your love I would sacrifice all,--everything in the world; I die without it; I must have it--I must!
You have been loved before; but never as I love you--never, never! And, Bianca, I--I--Bianca, you are my first love--my only love. Never, till I saw you, did I care to look on a woman for a second time; I never felt love. But, when I saw you--the first time--the first hour--Bianca, I must have your love or die; I thirst--I hunger for it. Since I have known you all my nature is changed; all my old life is flat and unmeaning, and without interest to me. I care for none of the things I used to care for; all--all has melted and slipped away from me, and nothing remains but one great devouring rage and pa.s.sion--my love for you!"
He had spoken like a torrent, which, for a long time dammed up, at last becomes too powerful for restraint, and bursts forth, overthrowing all obstacles with its headlong flood.
Bianca turned her face away from him towards the back of the sofa; but she slowly, and with an uncertain intermittent movement, drew his hand over to her lips, and pressed it against them.
A light came into the Marchese Lamberto's eyes;--a gleam almost, one would have said, rather fierce than fond, as he felt the pressure of her lips; and a shock as from an electric spark ran through all his body, making him quiver from head to heel.
"Bianca, Bianca! You are mine--you are mine!" he cried, pantingly, with his mouth close to her ear, and encircling her waist, as he spoke, with the hand which she had relinquished after she had kissed it in the manner that had been described.
But she sprang away from him, pus.h.i.+ng him from her, by putting her flat hand against his forehead, with her face still turned towards the back of the sofa, away from him.
"No, no, no!" she cried, violently; "it cannot be, not so--not so! I cannot--I cannot!"
"Bianca," he cried, starting to his feet as if he had been stung; "what does this mean? What am I to understand? What is it you wish? You know my position. I tell you that there is no sacrifice that I am not willing to make. I am rich; name what you would wish."
"Spare me--spare me, I deserve all; but spare me! I deserve to suffer, but not at your band," she cried, in words interrupted by her sobs.
"Spare you what, Bianca? In truth, I do not understand you," said the Marchese, genuinely mystified.
"Do you not understand?" she said, turning round on the sofa, so as to face him, and looking into his face with those great appealing eyes suffused with tears; "do you not understand? Can you not comprehend? A woman would understand, I think; but I suppose men feel these things differently."
"Upon my honour, Bianca, I do not know what you mean. Every word I have spoken to you has been spoken from the very depth of my heart. I am ready to--"
"Hush, hush, Marchese! No more of that; I could not bear it," she said, with a great sigh that seemed as if it would burst her bosom; "it is very--very painful to me; but I must endeavour to bring your heart to understand me,--it must be your heart, Lamber--your heart, Signor Marchese; for one does not arrive at the understanding of such things with the head. See, now, I will put myself in the place I deserve to occupy--in the dust at your feet! You may trample on me, if you will. I say I have deserved the shame and the misery I am now suffering. I deserve them because I have no right to resent the--the--the proposals which you--wish to make to me. I have suffered much from calumny and evil tongues--much from unhappy circ.u.mstances and evil surroundings. Yet it may be that I-have--more right to--resent--what--I have heard from you than you imagine. But let that pa.s.s. You know--or think you know--that I have accepted from others that which I have said I cannot accept from you; and you cannot imagine why this should be so. Oh, Marchese, does your heart lend you no aid to the understanding of it?
What were those men,--those empty creatures whose gold could not repay the disgust occasioned by their presence, what were they to me? Did they love--pretend even to love--me? Did I love them? Love! Alas, alas, alas!
Ah, Marchese, a poor girl exposed to the world, as I have been from my cradle upwards, has to suffer much that might well move the pity of a generous heart; but it is nothing--nothing--nothing to the tragedy of the misery, the shame, the remorse that comes upon her when at last the day shall come that her heart speaks and shows to her the awful chasm--the immeasurable gulf that separates such--I cannot, Lamber--pardon, I don't know what I am saying; I cannot go on--I cannot put it into words! Do not you--cannot you understand the difference?"
"I do understand, Bianca mia; povera anima sofferente--I do understand.
Do you imagine that I would judge you harshly--severely? I know too well all that you would say; I know the difficulties, the impossibilities of your position. Do you think that I cannot make allowances for all the fatalities attending on such a combination of circ.u.mstances? And, trust me, the difference between what has been, and what I so earnestly hope may be now, is greater,--I feel it to be greater, not less than you can feel it to be. Truly there is nothing in common between the all-devouring pa.s.sion which consumes me, and--such love-vows as you have spoken of. Do I not understand the difference. And remember, Bianca, dearest, that the protection I offer you would be the means of placing you out of the reach,--far out of the reach of any such disgusts,--such suffering for the future."
Bianca let her head fall on her bosom, and covered her face with her hands, and remained silent for some moments. Then, lifting her face slowly, and shaking her head, she sighed deeply as she looked with a wistful earnest glance into his eyes; she said,--"You are good,--you are,--very good and kind to me; perhaps it might have been better for my happiness if you had been less so. But bear with me yet a little, Signor Marchese. Sit down there,--there where I can see your face,"--pointing, as she spoke, to a spot exactly in face of the sofa,--"and let me see if I can explain myself to you. It is difficult; it is very difficult. A woman, as I said, would understand it at once; but men--are so different. You have told me, Signor Marchese, that you love me; that you never loved before; that I am the first woman who has ever moved your heart. Eh, bene, Signor Marchese! If I, having heard those protestations, were to confess that--that it was with me even as with you,"--she dropped her eyes and sighed as she made the confession;--"that I, too--that you have taught me now for the first time what it is to love,--though I might speak it less eloquently than you have done, the words would be equally true,--equally true, Signor,"
she repeated, slowly nodding her head. "And when I have confessed that it is so," she continued, speaking more rapidly, "can you wonder--can you not understand that it is impossible to me--that it would be a horror unspeakable to--to renew with the object of a true love--the first--the first, as G.o.d sees my heart--the degradation that has left nothing but bitterness and humiliation behind it? Shall the name of Lamberto di Castelmare be written in my memory in the hateful list of those who have been to me the occasion of remorse, of self-condemnation, of bitterness immeasurable? Never, never, never! Come what may there shall be one pure place in my heart; one unsoiled spot in my life; one ever-dear remembrance unlinked with sorrow and with shame; one memory which, however sad, shall not be humiliating."
She put her handkerchief to her eyes as she ceased speaking, and appeared to be entirely overcome by her emotion.
The Marchese rose from his chair in a state of hardly less agitation. He walked across the room;--returned to the sofa, and seemed for a moment as if he were going to take her hand; then turned away, and stood on the hearth-rug with his back to the fire. He was much moved, puzzled, pained, disappointed,--goaded and lashed more violently than ever by the furies of pa.s.sion; more than ever wis.h.i.+ng that he had never seen the beautiful creature lying there before him, and more than ever writhing in mind under the consciousness that to give her up was beyond his power.
At length he again stepped up to the side of the sofa and took her hand.
She started; and plucked it from him.
"Go, Signor Marchese--go, and leave me. It would perhaps be better so for both of us. I am not used to show to anybody the very inmost secrets of my heart, as I have been doing to you,--I know not why. Forget what I have said. Go, and forget me;--forget the poor comedian to whom your goodness, your n.o.bleness, and--your love--seemed for a pa.s.sing minute to open a blessed glimpse of a heaven upon earth; but never--never again propose to me to a.s.sociate the name of Lamberto di Castelmare with names that I would--oh, so fain--forget!"
Still the Marchese had not realized the nature of the position or seen the only outlet from the cul-de-sac into which he had been driven. It involved too monstrous an impossibility to seem to him to be an outlet at all. What was the real meaning of all this? Then suddenly an in-rus.h.i.+ng suspicion flashed across his mind like a blasting lightning brand, bringing with it a sharp pang, as of a dagger stab in the heart.
What was the meaning of all these protestations of admiration and affection, coupled with a denial of all that his pa.s.sion drove him there in search of? Did it perchance mean that this woman, so terrible in the power of her beauty, so dangerously irresistible, would fain have the protection which his position could give her, the supplies which might be drawn from his purse, while her love--such love as he wanted from her--would be given to a younger rival?
Suddenly he asked her, "When was the Marchese Ludovico here last?"
"The Marchese Ludovico?" said Bianca, carelessly; "oh, he is often here.
When last? Let me see: he was here this morning. As good and n.o.ble a gentleman as any in Italy he is, too. He is worthy to bear your name, Marchese, though it is only a poor girl like me that says it."
"He seems to have won your good will, anyhow," said the Marchese, frowning heavily. "What answer, I wonder, would he get if he were to speak to you as I spoke just now?"
"He would never speak so, Signor Marchese; he would know that, whatever might have been the case in past years, alas! it would be useless or worse to speak so now. I do not say, indeed, that--I have a sincere regard for the Marchese Ludovico. This much you may be very sure of, Marchese, that the feelings which you have surprised me into confessing would make it quite impossible for me to listen to any such words from the Marchese Ludovico. But, if ever the Marchese Ludovico were to say any word in my ear,--it would not be," continued Bianca, dropping her voice and speaking as if more to herself than to him--"it would not be to offer me what his uncle was offering me just now."
And now it flashed upon the Marchese for the first time what the real drift of Bianca's words and conduct had been. She wanted to be Marchesa di Castelmare. And the meaning of her last words, with their reticences and their half-uttered expressions spoken out at length might, he thought, be read thus: If you, Marchese Lamberto, do not make me Marchesa di Castelmare, your nephew will be ready enough to do so. The scandal, the wrong done to the family name, the chatter of all the tongues in Ravenna will be none the less. The matter would be, indeed, worse instead of better. For it would involve the grave injury that would be done to the Lady Violante, and the destruction of all the hopes built upon that alliance. All this seemed to be revealed to him as by a lightning flash. But the pang of jealousy, which had stung his heart, still remained the foremost and most prominent occupation of his mind.
"If you imagine, Bianca," he said after a while, "that my nephew would, or could, however much he might wish to do so, make any other kind of proposal to you, you are labouring under a delusion. I speak in all sincerity of heart."
"And I have spoken to you, G.o.d knows, with all sincerity, Signor Marchese. I have spoken as I have never before spoken to any human being. I have opened my heart to you to the very bottom of it. But the effort of doing so has been a painful one. It has terribly overset me; I feel like a wrung-out rag; and would fain rest. You will not be offended if I ask you to leave me now. It is getting late, too; and I expect my father home every instant. Good-night, Signor Marchese. Forgive me if I have said aught that I should not have said; if I have in any way offended you. I think you know how far the wish to do so is from my heart. Good-night."
"Good-night, Bianca," said the Marchese, taking the hand she held out to him, and retaining it in his own for some instants, despite his intention of specially abstaining from any demonstration of the kind--"Good-night, Bianca. We shall meet to-morrow morning."
"Yes, on business," said Bianca, looking up into his face with a sad smile. "Signor Ercole said he should be here at midday."
And then the Marchese left her, and, carefully shunning the more frequented parts of the city, returned to his own home.
CHAPTER IX
One Struggle more
The Marchese reached the Palazzo Castelmare un.o.bserved by any one, save old Quinto Lalli, who had been for some time past watching the door of his adopted daughter from a neighbouring corner, in order to ascertain when he might go home to his bed without infringing the order that had been given him.
"And what do you think of it now, papa mio?" said the Diva, when she had very faithfully, though summarily, recounted the scene which had just pa.s.sed, to her old friend and counsellor.
"Well, I see no reason to despair of the result," said Quinto. "You did not expect him to jump at the idea of making you Marchesa di Castelmare, I suppose? Of course he was a little staggered; and, probably, his own notion at this moment is, that he would rather never see your face again, than dream of such a thing. Ma, ci vuol pazienza! My notion is, that you will have him nibbling at the hook again before long. That little hint about the nephew was masterly. Depend upon it that will do its work."
"But, Quinto, I did not say a word to him that was not true--hardly a word. I do like him better, by an hundred times, than any other man I ever knew; and if I succeed, you see if I do not make him a good wife; I swear I will! As for Signor Ludovico, that is all trash and nonsense. He belongs to his Venetian, body and soul: and he has enough to think of, poor boy, in scheming to get out of the marriage they have planned for him."
"What! he wants to marry the Venetian, does he?" asked Quinto.
"Yes; they have engaged themselves to each other; she would not hear of anything else."
"Lord bless me! how moral and respectable the world is growing. I suppose Cupid himself will be attended by a gentleman in ca.s.sock and bands before long, and Mars will make Venus an honest woman, as the phrase goes. Well, I am not sorry I had my day in the old time. It would be rare fun, though, if these grand Signori, the uncle and the nephew, were both to be hooked in the same fas.h.i.+on at the same time."
"There is nothing against the character of the Venetian of any sort,"
said Bianca, with a sigh.
"Ta, ta, ta! I'd back your chance of the uncle against her chance of the nephew, any day of the week."
"Ludovico is solemnly engaged to her."