The Consolidator Part 16

But of these Things I am also promis'd a more particular Account upon my Journy into that Country.

I cannot however conclude this Matter, without giving some Account of my private Observations, upon what was farther to be seen in this Country.

And had not my Remarks on their State Matters taken up more of my Thoughts than I expected, I might have entred a little upon their other Affairs, such as their Companies, their Commerce, their Publick Offices, their Stock-Jobbers, their Temper, their Conversation, their Women, their Stages, Universities, their Courtiers, their Clergy, and the Characters of the severals under all these Denominations, but these must be referr'd to time, and my more perfect Observations.

But I cannot omit, that tho' I have very little Knowledge of Books, and had obtain'd less upon their Language, yet I could not but be very inquisitive after their Libraries and Men of Letters.

Among their Libraries I found not abundance of their own Books, their Learning having so much of Demonstration, and being very Hieroglyphical, but I found to my great Admiration vast quant.i.ties of Translated Books out of all Languages of our World.

As I thought my self one of the first, at least of our Nation, that ever came thus far; it was, you may be sure no small surprize to me to find all the most valluable parts of Modern Learning, especially of Politicks, Translated from our Tongue, into the Lunar Dialect, and stor'd up in their Libraries with the Remarks, Notes and Observations of the Learned Men of that Climate upon the Subject.

Here, among a vast croud of French Authors condemn'd in this polite World for trifling, came a huge Volume containing, Les Oevres de scavans, which has 19 small Bells painted upon the Book of several disproportion'd sizes.

I enquir'd the meaning of that Hieroglyphick, which the Master of the Books told me, was to signify that the substance was all Jingle and Noise, and that of 30 Volumes which that one Book contains, 29 of them have neither Substance, Musick, Harmony nor value in them.

The History of the Fulsoms, or a Collection of 300 fine Speeches made in the French Accademy at Paris, and 1500 gay Flourishes out of Monsieur Boileau, all in Praise of the invincible Monarch of France.

The Duke of Bavaria's Manifesto, shewing the Right of making War against our Sovereigns, from whence the People of that Lunar World have noted that the same Reasons which made it lawful to him to attempt the Imperial Power, ent.i.tle him to lose his own, viz.

Conquest, and the longest Sword.

Jack a both Sides, or a Dialogue between Pasquin and Marforio, upon the Subject Matter of the Pope's sincerity in Case of the War in Italy. Written by a Citizen of Ferrara. One side arguing upon the occasion of the Pope's General wheedling the Imperialists to quit that Country. The other bantering Imperial Policy, or the Germains pretending they were Trickt out of Italy, when they could stay there no longer.

Lewis the Invincible, by Monsieur Boileau. A Poem, on the Glory of his most Christian Majesties Arms at Hochstedt, and Verue.

All these Translations have innumerable Hyerogliphical Notes, and Emblems painted on them, which pa.s.s as Comments, and are readily understood in that Climate. For Example, on the Vol. of Dialogues are two Cardinals was.h.i.+ng the Pope's Hands under a Cloud that often bespatters them with Blood, signifying that in spight of all his Pretensions he has a Hand in the Broils of Italy. And before him the Sun setting in a Cloud, and a Blind Ballad-Singer making Sonnets upon the brightness of its l.u.s.tre.

The three Kings of Brentford, being some Historical Observations on three mighty Monarchs in our World, whose Heroick Actions may be the Subject of future Ages, being like to do little in this, the King of England, King of Poland, and King of Spain. These are describ'd by a Figure, representing a Castle in the Air, and three Knights pointing at it, but they could not catch.

I omit abundance of very excellent pieces, because remote, as three great Volumes of European Misteries, among the vast varieties of which, and very entertaining, I observ'd but a few, such as these:

1. Why Prince Ragotski will make no Peace with the Emperor.--- But more particularly why the Emperor won't make Peace with him.

2. Where the Policy of the King of Sweden lies, to persue the King of Poland, and let the Muscovites ravage and destroy his own Subjects.

3. What the Duke of Bavaria propos'd to himself in declaring for France.

4. Why the Protestants of the Confederacy never reliev'd the Camisars.

5. Why there are no Cowards found in the English Service, but among their Sea Captains.

6. Why the King of Portugal did not take Madrid, why the English did not take Cadiz, and why the Spaniards did not take Gibraltar, viz.

because the first were Fools, the second Knaves, and the last Spaniards.

7. What became of all the Silver taken at Vigo.

8. Who will be the next King of Scotland.

9. If England should ever want a King, who would think it worth while to accept of it.

10. What specifick difference can be produc'd between a Knave, a Coward, and a Traytor.

Abundance of these Mysteries are Hieroglyphically describ'd in this ample Collection, and without doubt our great Collection of Annals, and Historical Observations, particularly the Learned Mr. Walker, would make great Improvements there.

But to come nearer home, There, to my great Amas.e.m.e.nt, I found several new Tracts out of our own Language, which I could hardly have imagin'd it possible should have reacht so far.

As first, sundry Transactions of our Royal Society about Winds, and a valuable Desertation of Dr. B.....'s about Wind in the Brain.

A Discourse of Poisons, by the Learned Dr. M..... with Lunar Notes upon it, wherein it appears that Dr. C....d had more Poison in his Tongue, than all the Adders the Moon have in their Teeth.

Nec Non, or Lawyers Latin turn'd into Lunar Burlesque. The Hyerogliphick was the Queens Mony tost in a Blanket, Dedicated to the Attorney General, and five false Latin Councellors.

Mandamus, as it was Acted at Abb...ton a.s.sizes, by Mr. So....r General, where the Qu..n had her own So...r against her for a bad Cause, and never a Counsel for her in a good one.

Lunar Reflections, being a List of about 2000 ridiculous Errors in History, palpable Falsities, and scandalous Omissions in Mr.

Collier's Geographical Dictionary; with a subsequent Enquiry by way of Appendix, into which are his own, and which he has ignorantly deduc'd from ancient Authors.

a.s.sa.s.sination and Killing of Kings, prov'd to be a Church of England Doctrin; humbly Dedicated to the Prince of Wales, by Mr. Collier and Mr. Snat; wherein their Absolving Sir John Friend and Sir William Parkins without Repentance, and while they both own'd and justify'd the Fact, is Vindicated and Defended.

Les Bagatelles, or Brom..ys Travels into Italy, a choice Book, and by great Accident preserv'd from the malitious Design of the Author, who diligently Bought up the whole Impression, for fear they should be seen, as a thing of which this ungrateful Age was not worthy.

Killing no Murther, being an Account of the severe Justice design'd to be inflicted on the barbarous Murtherers of the honest Constable at Bow, but unhappily prevented by my Lord N.....m being turn'd out of his Office.

De modo Belli, or an Account of the best Method of making Conquests and Invasion a la Mode de Port St. Mary, 3 Volumes in 80. Dedicated to Sir Hen. Bell...s.

King Charles the first prov'd a T...t. By Edward Earl of Clarendon, 3 Vol. in Fol. Dedicated to the University of Oxford.

The Bawdy Poets, or new and accurate Editions of Catullus, Propertius, and Tibullus, being the Maiden-head of the new Printing Press at Cambridge, Dedicated by the Editor Mr. Ann...y to the University, and in consideration of which, and some Disorders near Casterton, the University thought him fit to represent them in P......t.

Alms no Charity, or the Skeleton of Sir Humphry Mackworth's Bill for relief of the Poor: Being an excellent new Contrivance to find Employment for all the Poor in the Nation, viz. By setting them at Work, to make all the rest of the People as Poor as themselves.

Synodic.u.m Superlativum, being sixteen large Volumes of the vigorous Proceedings of the English Convocation, digested into Years, one Volume to every Year. -- Wherein are several large Lists of the Heretical, Atheistical, Deistical and other pernitious Errors which have been Condemn'd in that Venerable a.s.sembly, the various Services done, and weighty Matters dispatcht, for the Honour of the English Church, for sixteen Years last past, with their formal Proceedings against Asgil, Coward, Toland and others, for reviving old Antiquated Errors in Doctrine, and Publis.h.i.+ng them to the World as their own.

New Worlds in Trade, being a vast Collection out of the Journals of the Proceedings of the Right Honourable the Commissioners of Trade, with several Eminent Improvements in general Negoce, vast Schemes of Business, and new Discoveries of Settlements and Correspondences in Forreign Parts, for the Honour and Advantage of the English Merchants, being 12 Volumes in Fol. and very scarce and valluable Books.

Legal Rebellion, or an Argument proving that all sorts of Insurrections of Subjects against their Princes, are lawful, and to be supported whenever they suit with our Occasions, made good from the Practice of France with the Hungarians, the English with the Camisars, the Swede with the Poles, the Emperor with the Subjects of Naples, and all the Princes of the World as they find occasion, a large Volume in Folio, with a Poem upon the Sacred Right of Kingly Power.

Ignis Fatuus or the Occasional Bill in Minature, a Farce, as it was acted by his Excellency the Lord Gr...il's Servants in Carolina.

Running away the shortest way to Victory, being a large Dissertation, shewing to save the Queens s.h.i.+ps, is the best way to beat the French.

The Tookites, a Poem upon the 134.

A new Tract upon Trade, being a Demonstration that to be always putting the People upon customary Mourning, and wearing Black upon every State Occasion, is an excellent Encouragement to Trade, and a means to employ the Poor.

City Grat.i.tude, being a Poem on the Statue erected by the Court of Aldermen at the upper end of Cheapside, to the Immortal Memory of King William.

There were many more Tracts to be found in this place; but these may suffice for a Specimen, and to excite all Men that would encrease their Understandings in humane Mysteries, to take a Voyage to this enlightned Country. Where their Memories, thinking Faculties and Penetration, will no question be so Tackt and Consolidated, that when they return, they all Write Memoirs of the Place, and communicate to their Country the Advantages they have reapt by their Voyage, according to the laudable Example of their

Most humble Servant, The Man in the Moon.