The Book of Someday Part 17

James indicates a bench beside the entry, near a display case filled with champions.h.i.+p ribbons and riding trophies. "You can wait there if you want, and I can go see if the coast is clear...but I don't think we've given it enough time yet. What do you say we stay down here for a few more minutes?"

Livvi nods.

"Excellent choice," James says. "Let's take a stroll."

While James is walking her out of the barn, toward the paddock and the spectacular view of the ocean, Livvi, wondering if it was Andrew, asks: "Who won all the ribbons and the trophies?"

"They belonged to Katherine."

A s.h.i.+ver flits down Livvi's spine-she's back on that rainy day in Chicago, hearing Andrew say: "...that girl looks exactly like Katherine...somebody I loved."

There's a terrible sense of foreboding in Livvi; she can barely speak. "Tell me about Katherine."

"Andrew didn't tell you?"

"No," Livvi whispers. She can sense that what's coming isn't going to be good.

"He didn't tell you that he...and Katherine...and our other brother, Mark...were triplets?"

"No, Andrew never mentioned that."

Livvi has the gut-wrenching feeling that, in listening to whatever James is about say, she'll be taking a plunge into darkness.

His words are slow, and quiet. "Katherine and Mark were killed. When they were fifteen."

"What happened?"

James looks out toward the ocean. "I guess I'm not surprised Andrew hasn't mentioned it. It's a difficult thing for our family to talk about."

After a s.p.a.ce of several seconds, James tells Livvi: "We always go away for a couple of weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas. We were up at a vacation home we used to have in Lake Arrowhead and my parents were out at dinner one night...I was with them, I'd just turned eight. Katherine and Mark and Andrew didn't come with us, because earlier that afternoon my dad caught the three of them underage-drunk, on beer, out at the end of our boat dock, and they were grounded."

James seems to be having trouble keeping his voice steady. "Mark and Katherine were in the house. Upstairs, asleep. There was a problem with an oil heater and the place burned to the ground. They died in the fire."

Before Livvi can say anything, James tells her: "I'll save you the trouble of asking how come Andrew is still with us. He wasn't in the house...he was down at the lake. He'd sneaked out. To be with a girl."

What James has just revealed has dropped Livvi to the ground-left her in a sitting position on the gra.s.s, with her back against one of the paddock's fence-posts.

James sits beside her and quietly adds: "As far as my parents are concerned, I think that night split Andrew right down the middle for them. Half of him, a pariah-the h.o.r.n.y brother who slipped out and left his siblings to die. And the other half, a treasure-their firstborn and the only one of their picture-perfect triplets still walking the earth."

"It's horrible," Livvi murmurs. "All of it..."

She's overwhelmed by the monumental nature of Andrew's secrets-and wondering how many others he might still be keeping.

"My brother is a decent guy who's had a lot of indecent things happen to him." James is tilting his head in the direction of the house. "You crossed paths with two of them in the driveway a few minutes ago."

In response to Livvi's look of surprise, he tells her: "Andrew's wife is a vindictive former homecoming queen who's out of her mind, and my mother is my mother-and I love her-but she can turn life into a living h.e.l.l when she puts her mind to it."

Livvi isn't sure what to make of James. "Why are you telling me all these things?"

"Because I think you should know what you're getting into. And because I want you to be kind to my brother. He's dragging a heavy load."

Livvi doesn't respond. And James says: "He's screwed up a lot of things-more than he should have. But he has a good heart. You need to understand that, need to believe it."

Livvi isn't sure what she understands, or believes, about Andrew.

After a while, she asks: "How long have Andrew and his wife been separated?"

"I don't know...two, maybe three years."

"And why did he leave her?"

"It's not exactly as clear-cut as that. Technically Andrew didn't leave Kayla, she left him. But in another way he did leave her-by not going with her."

"What happened?" Livvi is almost reluctant to hear the answer.

"The house in Flintridge was where they lived until a few years ago-when Kayla decided she wanted to relocate down here, to have a bigger place and be closer to her parents, and mine. Andrew didn't want to move."

Livvi indicates the lush lawns and the ocean view. "Why? This area is like something you'd see in a movie."

"I don't think he particularly wanted to be that close to my folks, or to hers. And it would've made his work commute a nightmare-at the height of traffic it would've been a couple of hours each way. Kayla told Andrew he'd get used to it. She went ahead and bought the place in Palos Verdes, moved in, and waited for him to show up. He never did. I think he was relieved that she came down here. I think he was looking for a way out."

And the question in Livvi's mind is, If he really wanted out, why didn't he ever ask for a divorce...? But before she can ask it, James has already gotten to his feet and started toward the house, announcing: "It's time to go back now."

Livvi is scrambling after him. While James is pointing to one of the mansion's terraces, where a handsome old man is standing beside the woman in red. "That's my father, he's eighty-two. There's a major age difference-my mother is his trophy wife. He's a little deaf, when you talk to him you have to speak up."

As soon as Livvi and James have completed their journey across the lawn and have stepped onto the terrace, the woman in red, James and Andrew's mother, who has been looking directly at Livvi, deliberately turns away and goes into the house.

The old man, Andrew's father, tells Livvi: "While we were watching you walk up here, my wife was saying she couldn't understand what Andrew sees in you. It might be time for her to have her eyes checked. You're a gorgeous young woman."

Livvi is thunderstruck by how much this man, even in the frailty of old age, looks like Andrew.

"I hope you weren't unduly upset by the family drama," the old man is saying. "I think I can a.s.sure you it's over, at least for the moment. Andrew has driven Kayla home and he's upstairs-getting Grace ready for her weekend with the two of you."

The old man sits down onto a cus.h.i.+oned teak bench, with effort and a small grunt, muttering to James: "Inform Andrew that Livvi will be waiting for him in the car."

After James has gone, the old man tells Livvi: "There isn't any need to subject you to my wife's wrath-and inviting you into the house would only serve to do that. My wife is very fond of Kayla-she considers her a daughter. Kayla is the woman my wife personally selected for Andrew. Unfortunately, vengeance is visited on anyone who dares to interfere with my wife's choices."

The old man gestures for Livvi to sit beside him. And in a light, amiable tone, he tells her: "I'm a man who understands right from wrong and I recognize that you're being treated badly-but I'm at a place in my life where I'm unwilling to rock my own boat in order to steady someone else's."

He is looking out over the rolling lawns, letting his gaze linger on the ocean view. "When I was middle-aged and at the top of my game I discarded a family-and a wife who was as middle-aged as I was and who was comfortable with me. I married a woman who was young and bedazzled by me. Now that I'm ancient of days, and at the tail-end of my game, I need her to stick around and be happy with me."

His voice has the faintest hint of a tremor as he adds: "I've seen what happens to old men when they're discarded and alone." After a long moment, Andrew's father puts his hand on Livvi's, then briskly says: "Good-bye. And good luck."

His touch makes Livvi s.h.i.+ver. Makes her want to leave the teak bench and run as fast, and as far, as she can.

The old man's hand, which is almost identical in shape to Andrew's, is weightless. Like the carca.s.s of a small bird. Nothing more than a clutch of hollow bones wrapped in skin as thin, and as dry, as a sheet of parchment.

Livvi is walking quickly across Andrew's parents' driveway. Listening for a shout, a scream, the roar of an approaching car. Wis.h.i.+ng she could vanish into some other place, some other time, where this diabolical afternoon never happened.

She's in tears-wiping at them with the back of her hand.

The mansion's front doors are flying open. And Grace, clutching her little pink pig, is running out of the house. Her eyes lit with joy and fastened on Livvi.

Instantly, Livvi is dropping to her knees-with her arms outstretched.

Grace is hurling herself at Livvi. Burrowing into their mutual hug like a rootless drifter suddenly finding home. "Livvi!" is the only thing she says. And in that single word there is absolute euphoria.

"I've missed you so much," Livvi tells her. The sweetness of holding Grace again-the contentment, the rightness of it-is perfect.

"Don't ever go away. Ever. Ever." Grace's arms are around Livvi's neck, her face buried against Livvi's shoulder.

For the tiniest breath of time Livvi is in complete bliss.

But then Grace is suddenly stiffening-pulling away-putting distance between them.

Andrew's mother, the woman in red, has appeared on the doorstep of the mansion. Holding a phone. Her eyes focused on Livvi, and icy cold. As she's telling Grace: "Go back in the house. You forgot to give your grandpa a kiss good-bye."

Grace puts her toy pig into Livvi's care and whispers: "Hold Piglet for me and don't go away. I'll be right back."

As always, Grace's solemn, earnest look is followed, after a brief uncertainty, by a hopeful smile.

Seeing that look, and that smile-understanding the depth of its vulnerability-is bruising Livvi's heart.

Grace has left Livvi now and is das.h.i.+ng past Andrew's mother, into the house. Bree, the blond nanny, is on the other side of the open door.

When both Bree and Grace are out of sight, Andrew's mother turns toward Livvi-Livvi is surprised by how youthful she is. Her shoulder-length hair is thick, dark; only the slightest hint of gray. Her skin is smooth, except for a netting of fine lines around her mouth. Her eyes are large, olive green. And as they are coming to rest on Livvi, the look in them is murderous.

Andrew's car is only a few feet away-Livvi is wanting to get to it as quickly as possible and lock herself inside.

But Andrew's mother freezes her with a withering stare, and says: "I was hoping it was my son who was out here. He's wanted on the-"

She is being interrupted by the sound of footsteps. Andrew coming around the side of the house, carrying a pink-and-white blanket and a small pink suitcase.

He seems beaten-up, depleted. Like a worn-out copy of himself. The look he gives Livvi is one of exhaustion, and heartbreak.

Livvi's first impulse is to go to him, but she's not quite sure what's happening. Today has already held too many unpleasant surprises-she doesn't want to walk, head-on, into another one.

Andrew's mother has come down the steps of the house and placed herself directly between Andrew and Livvi.

Andrew moves past his mother without a word and opens the trunk of the Mercedes. She follows him to the car, her voice low and sarcastic. "Ducking out the back? Creeping along the side of the house? Were you planning to sneak off without saying good-bye?"

"I think we've said enough for today." Andrew drops the blanket and the pink suitcase into the trunk, closing the trunk-lid with a slam.

He's coming around to open the pa.s.senger door for Livvi; his mother is once again blocking his way. This time, she hands Andrew the phone that she has been holding.

She's staring daggers at him as she says: "Kayla needs to talk to you."

"About what?" Andrew growls. "It's been all of fifteen minutes since I drove her home."

There's a strangled wildness, a trapped animal look in Andrew that Livvi has never seen before-a caged tiger dreaming of sinking its teeth into a s.a.d.i.s.tic trainer.

"Answer the d.a.m.n phone," Andrew's mother tells him. "It's about Grace."

Andrew puts the phone to his ear and looks at Livvi. Mutely telling her he's sorry. Then he turns away, with his shoulders slightly hunched. As if trying to create some form of isolation. And Livvi wonders, is he trying to s.h.i.+eld her from his wife?-or trying to s.h.i.+eld his wife from her?

After a brief exchange in which Andrew's voice is little more than a murmur, he hands the phone back to his mother and says: "Kayla wanted to confirm what time Grace will be home on Sunday night. I told her it would be the same time I agreed it would be when I saw her fifteen minutes ago."

"Speaking of Grace, you need to take her shopping for new bathing suits. I'm still working on dates...but for the family winter trip this year, I'm thinking in terms of Bermuda."

"We'll talk about it later." Andrew is attempting to maneuver around his mother, making it clear he wants to head in the direction of the car, and Livvi.

His mother says: "Try to have a nice weekend." She gives him a pat on the cheek. It starts out quick and mean. Then turns slow and tender. A vicious slap-wrapped in a tender caress.

And in that spiteful gesture, Livvi is seeing what James had described when he talked about Andrew sneaking out of the house where his brother and sister were burned to death-"As far as my parents are concerned...that night split Andrew right down the middle for them. Half of him, a pariah-the brother who slipped out and left his siblings to die. And the other half, a treasure-their firstborn and the only one of their picture-perfect triplets still walking the earth."

The delivery of that caressing slap-the reminder to Andrew that his mother loves him just as much as she hates him-is showing Livvi why James said, "...be kind to my brother, he's dragging a heavy load."

Andrew's mother is pa.s.sing Livvi now, on her way back into the house; and she's saying: "I want you to know...the circ.u.mstances that pushed Kayla to behave as she did today are disgusting. I have a son who is treating his wife, and his marriage vows, like garbage."

The way this statement has been delivered makes Livvi feel like she's just been spit on.

Almost instantly, Andrew is wrapping his arms around Livvi, kissing her, cradling her. "Don't pay any attention. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have brought you here. I had no idea she'd be so rude-"

Livvi isn't listening.

She's saying: "You have a dead sister, and a dead brother, you never told me about. There's no point to this. I don't know you, Andrew. I don't know who you are."

Andrew has lifted Livvi from the ground, holding her to his chest, turning her in a circle, pleading. "You do know me. You do."

"I didn't know about Grace. I didn't know about your wife, or your sister, or your brother..."

Livvi is in torment.

"You do know who I am," he's insisting. "You know the man I am now. You know that I love you."

Wanting to escape from Andrew, and terrified at the thought of living without him-Livvi is being ripped to shreds.

"None of what happened here today has anything to do with us," he's saying. "I'm getting a divorce. I swear." Andrew releases his hold on Livvi-gently letting her feet touch the ground again.

"What good will it do?" Livvi is exhausted, defeated. "Your mother won't care if you're divorced, neither will your wife. They'll never set you free."

"That doesn't make any difference." Andrew is trying to kiss her tears away. "No matter what happens, no matter what, you'll always be my first choice."

And Livvi, with a sinking heart, is thinking, But I'll never be your only choice.