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I nodded.
"Open it," he said.
With cautious fingers, I pulled the box closer and thumbed open the lid. "Oh."
Nestled inside the black leather and velvet was a ring like no other. Gold rope-like bands were intertwined and decorated with Xs covered in diamonds.
"Bonds," I murmured, "secured by crosses." Gideon Cross.
"Not quite. I see the ropes as representative of the many threads of you, not bondage. But yes, the Xs are me holding on to you. By my fingernails, it feels like." He finished his gla.s.s of wine and refilled both our gla.s.ses.
I sat unmoving, stunned, trying to take it all in. Everything he'd done in the time we'd been apart - the photos, the ring, Dr. Petersen, the replicated bedroom, and whoever had been following me around - told me I'd never been far from his mind, if I'd even left it at all.
"You gave me my keys back," I whispered, still remembering the pain.
His hand reached out and covered mine. "There are a lot of reasons why I did that. You left me wearing nothing but a robe, Eva, and without your keys. I can't stand thinking about what could've happened if Cary hadn't been home to let you in right away."
Lifting his hand to my mouth, I kissed the back; then released him and closed the lid of the ring box. "It's beautiful, Gideon. Thank you. It means a lot to me."
"But you won't wear it." It wasn't a question.
"After the conversation we've had tonight, it feels like a collar."
After a moment, he nodded. "You're not altogether wrong."
My brain hurt and my heart ached. Four nights of restless sleeping didn't help. I couldn't understand why he felt I was so necessary, even though I felt that way about him. There were thousands of women in New York alone who could replace me in his life, but there was only one Gideon Cross.
"I feel like I'm disappointing you, Gideon. After everything we've talked about tonight...I feel like this is the beginning of the end."
Pus.h.i.+ng his chair back, he angled toward me and touched my cheek. "It's not."
"When do we see Dr. Petersen?"
"I'll go alone on Tuesdays. After you talk to him and agree to couples counseling, we can go together on Thursdays."
"Two hours of your week, every week. Not including the travel back and forth. That's a big commitment." I reached up and brushed the hair back from his cheek. "Thank you."
Gideon caught my hand and kissed the palm. "It's no sacrifice, Eva."
He went into his office to work a bit before bed and I carried the ring box into the master bathroom with me. I studied it further while I brushed my teeth and hair.
There was a soft hum of need beneath my skin, a persistent level of arousal that shouldn't have been possible considering the number of o.r.g.a.s.ms I'd already had over the course of the day. It was an emotionally driven need to connect to Gideon, to rea.s.sure myself that we were okay.
Clutching the ring box in my hand, I went to my side of Gideon's bed and set it on the nightstand. I wanted it where I'd see it first thing in the morning, after a good night's sleep.
With a sigh, I draped my beautiful new robe over the footboard and crawled into bed. After tossing and turning for a long while, I finally crashed.
I woke sometime in the middle of the night to a racing pulse and quick, shallow breathing. Disoriented, I lay still for a moment, gathering my bearings and remembering where I was. I tensed when it sank in, my ears straining to hear if Gideon was having another nightmare. When I discovered him lying quietly beside me, his breathing deep and even, I relaxed with a sigh.
What time had he finally come to bed? After the days we'd spent apart, it worried me that he might have felt a need to be alone.
Then it hit me. I was aroused. Painfully so.
My br**sts were full and heavy, my ni**les furled and tight. My core was aching and my cleft wet. As I lay there in the moonlit darkness, I realized that my own body had woken me with its demands. Had I dreamed something erotic? Or was it enough that Gideon was lying beside me?
Pus.h.i.+ng up onto my elbows, I looked at him. The sheet and comforter clung to his waist, leaving his sculpted chest and biceps bared. His right arm was tossed over his head, framing the fall of dark hair around his lavishly handsome face. His left arm lay between us on the blankets, the hand fisted and bringing to relief the network of thick veins that coursed up his forearms. Even in repose he looked fierce and powerful.
I became more aware of the tension inside me, the sense that I was drawn to him by the silent exertion of his formidable will. It wasn't possible that he could demand my surrender while he was sleeping, yet it felt that way, felt like that invisible rope between us was pulling me to him.
The throbbing between my legs grew unbearable and I pressed one hand against the violent pulsing, hoping to dull the ache. The pressure worsened it instead.
I couldn't stay still. Throwing the covers off, I slid my legs off the side of the mattress and thought about trying a gla.s.s of warm milk with the brandy Gideon had given me earlier. Abruptly, I paused, riveted by the moonlight gleaming off the leather of the ring box on the nightstand. I thought of the jewelry inside it and my desire surged. At that moment, the thought of being collared by Gideon filled me with heated yearning.
You're just h.o.r.n.y, I scolded myself.
One of the girls in group had talked about how her "master" could use her body any time and in any way he wanted, for his pleasure alone. There was nothing about that I'd found s.e.xy...until I put Gideon in the picture. I loved getting him off. I loved making him come. Just because.
My fingers brushed over the lid of the tiny box. Exhaling a shaky breath, I picked it up and opened it. A moment later I was sliding the cool band onto the ring finger of my right hand.