Break It Up Part 16

"I want a copy of our contract with Aidan. I just need to get clear on some stuff," Zach says.

Rick looks him up and down. "Why would I have a copy of that?"

"Well, who would?"

"Ask Aidan."

"Okay, fine," says Zach.

It's shocking to see how quickly he backs down. This is not the hyper-confident Zach Wechsler I know. This is a whole new side to him.

Rick slams his door and leaves us standing in the hallway. Zach heads over to me, his head down.

"Ask Amy," I suggest.

"I guess I could. She's back downstairs."

Well, at least I'm getting good exercise tonight.

AMY OPENS her door in a nightgown, looking bewildered. She sees Zach and then cranes her neck and sees me. I wave, unsure how to react.

"Hey," says Zach. "Do you have a copy of our contract with Aidan?"

"Mmm? Yeah. I have a scan of it."

My heart lifts.

"You do?" says Zach. "Can you email it to Mark Wilc.o.x?"

"Mmm-hmm. You want me to do that now?"

"Please. You are the best. Thanks for keeping a copy of that."

She blinks, shrugs, and says, "Okay, I'll go do that." Unlike Rick, she waits until Zach turns away before she shuts the door.

By now, it's past two in the morning and even the floor is looking like a comfortable place to crash. All the drama has worn me out. "So, that's about all we can do tonight, right?" I say.

Zach nods and I turn to head for my room. I'm glad he found the contract and all that, but now that that's all cleared up, I'm still mad at him.

He jogs to catch up with me. "Hey," he says, touching my wrist. "Thanks."

"Yeah, sure."

"Kyra, wait."

I stop and turn, and hope this isn't the start of another confrontation.

He catches me under the chin with his crooked finger and makes me look him in the eye. "What's wrong?"

"Insulting Chloe is off limits, okay? Doesn't matter who you are. She's one of the best friends I've ever had."

"What's she like?"

I fold my arms. I should have known better than to bring up this argument again. While I do want to make my position on Chloe clear, I also want to get some sleep tonight. "She doesn't have to smile for the cameras. She doesn't owe it to the world to be photogenic. Seriously. You try saving the life of a child, failing, and then explaining to the rest of the planet how this happened. You're all stressed out over one contract over one film depicting one stinking band. It isn't a life or death situation."

His eyes, looking into mine, widen slightly.

"Yeah," I dig. "You were mocking someone who's just dealt with a death. A traumatic death. Of an innocent child. She felt responsible. You have no idea what that's like."

"Okay, okay. Yes. You've made me feel completely shallow."

I shrug, not backing down. It's what Chloe would do. If the choice is her or Zach, it's no choice at all.

"Kyra, I'm sorry."

Not what I expected. "Now you're sorry?"

"Yes."

"But earlier you were showing me videos of her and mocking her and when I defend her-"

"I was out of line."

Huh? I press the heel of my hand to my forehead. "Listen... Okay. Thanks for saying that. I'm gonna go to bed."

"Hey, no." He grabs my wrist. "Really, I'm sorry."

"I heard you."

"Don't be mad at me."

"I'm just tired. I'm going to bed now."

"Can I walk you to your door?"

I'm far too tired and fed up to argue.

ONCE BACK in my room, I shut myself in the bathroom without even bothering to tell Zach goodbye. I slide my clothes off and hose myself down in the shower. The warm water is liquid comfort, sluicing over me.

I towel my hair dry, give my body a once-over, and then clutch the towel to my front as I open the door. I'm too tired to put on pajamas tonight.

Zach is seated on my bed, fully clothed, his shoes still on, and when he looks up and sees me, he's startled. "Oh, sorry. I, uh, I should've let you know I was still here. I..."

I hastily wrap the towel around myself. "No, it's my fault." Why is he still here?

"Well, okay, I'm not actually sorry. But I'm pretending to be sorry that I saw that much skin." He's trying to lighten the mood.

Not. Funny. At. All. I am in no mood for stupid games, or jokes, or whatever it is he's doing.

"My pajamas are under the pill-"

He gets to his feet and pulls his s.h.i.+rt off. "No, it's all good."

Okay, I think. What the h.e.l.l? His chest and abs are chiseled perfection.

Zach walks towards me, the air steamy thanks to my hot shower. I readjust the grip on my towel.

With a fluid motion, he holds up his s.h.i.+rt and slips the neck hole over my head.

Chivalrous, I think. And messed up.

I fumble around, not sure what I'm doing as he guides first one arm and then the other through the armholes. Then he smoothes the cotton fabric down my back. The s.h.i.+rt's big enough to hang to my mid thighs. I'm able to s.h.i.+mmy out of my towel without flas.h.i.+ng him. It's too late at night, and this is all too weird and I can't help but feel my distinct lack of underwear. I turn around to hang the towel on its hook.

No sooner do I turn, though, than Zach hugs me from behind and presses his lips to the nape of my neck. I drop my towel and reach back and grasp his bare shoulder while he proceeds to run his hands over my stomach, his fingers taking note of my curves. I gasp and lean my head back as his kisses become more fervent. My eyelids flutter shut and my breathing is labored now. "Zach," I whisper, "what are you doing?"

"I'm tired of being your friend, okay? It's killing me."

I turn and his lips find mine immediately. The kiss is everything I dreamed of-literally. His hands press me firmly against his body, and the skin of his neck and chest is soft and smooth under my fingertips.

His fingers dig into the thin fabric of his s.h.i.+rt I'm wearing, and I break off the kiss before this goes too far. For a long moment we just stand there, our foreheads together, our breathing heavy. His fingers trace along my hairline as he pushes stray strands back from my face. It's obvious he's stressed and not entirely in his right mind.

I could have him tonight. That much is obvious. I could unfasten his jeans, slide them off, and lead him over to my bed, and he'd go with it. We'd keep each other up until all hours, burning off all the stress and frustration between us, and I bet he'd still talk to me in the morning.

But I also know enough about bad ways to hook up to recognize this for what it is. A distraction. Confusion. Him feeling all alone in the world with no one to turn to. Our fight clearly rattled his foundations, and this is his way of trying to bind me to him so that he doesn't feel so isolated.

Those eyes of his search mine, trying to read me and coming up blank.

I exhale and press my lips to his again, gently this time. His arms tighten around me at once, but I don't escalate. Instead, I lead him over to the bed, climb in, and tuck the covers around me before I pull him to lie down next to me. This is a pretty pathetic way to avoid having s.e.x or feeling each other up, but that isn't what he needs right now-or what he really wants.

He settles himself beside me and leans in for more hungry kisses, which I return with equal fervor, stroking my fingers along his shoulders to help him relax. "I'm here, okay?" I whisper. "I'm not going anywhere."

"Kyra," he whispers. "I've wanted to be with you ever since we met."

"When I acted all awkward and stupid in the restaurant?"

"No, I got it. Your friends were trying to seduce the three of us, and you... You're not like that."

Yeah, he really doesn't know me at all.

"So I don't ever want to push you further than you want to go. We'll take this at your pace. Just be with me."

I shut my eyes. How to get out of this mess? He's the one being coddled here, but he hasn't got a clue.

I'm too tired to figure out how to fix this. I just kiss and hold him and tell him over and over that it'll be all right and that I'm here for him until he falls asleep in my arms. Only then do I let myself cry. How did I screw this up so badly? The moment he learns who I really am, he'll ditch me and not look back. Hours ago, that would have hurt. Now, after this? It'll feel like having my still-beating heart ripped out of my chest.

From this angle, all I can see is his shoulder and the line of his jaw and his back rising and falling. I run my fingers over his cheekbone. At least for this moment, he's mine. I try to be content with that.

I WAKE when Zach jerks suddenly and open my eyes to faint sunlight streaming in through the gauzy curtains. "Sorry," he whispers.

"Hmm?"

He's on his feet, running his fingers through his hair. My side feels cold without the press of his body, and my mouth tastes like something furry crawled inside and died during the night. I bet I could knock him dead from ten feet away with my morning breath, so I speak softly, thinking that won't expel much air in his direction. "You want your s.h.i.+rt?"

"h.e.l.lo?"

Through my squinting lids I see he's on the phone.

"Wait, what?" he says.

I open my eyes and roll to look at the clock. It's four in the morning.

"Okay. Okay. Um...can we do that? Well...I don't know. I'll talk to everyone." The color has drained from his face and his hands are shaking.

I sit up and smooth my hair as best I can. At least I lay completely still when I slept. There aren't a ton of tangles.

"I'll convene a meeting. Right. We're in Lisbon. Sure. Okay, I get it." He listens for a moment longer before he startles again and holds his phone out to look at it.

"Who was that?" I ask.

"The lawyer."

"Oh." I do the math in my head quickly. It's only seven p.m. in LA. "He read the contract?"

"He says we gave the crew the right to do whatever they want, film whatever they want, and we have no say on the final product."

"So what did he say to do?"

"Call a meeting, see if we can renegotiate. Our one way out of the deal is if we cancel the tour." He's at a loss.

"Well, one thing at a time," I say. "See what happens if you call a meeting."

He runs his fingers through his rumpled hair and paces, looking every inch the rocker s.e.x G.o.d. Minus the tattoos. "I screwed up."

"Your band mates screwed up. You tried to talk them out of this."

"Yeah, but-"

I'm back in best friend mode, even though it hurts something awful. "You're not their caregiver. They're grown men. I mean, come on. Why aren't you angry? Why the guilt?"

"Because like you said, those guys are my family. They're my little brother and my idiot cousin. I've always looked out for them."

"Well, I'm sorry. But, you know, save your panic until you have something more specific to panic about."

That earns me a smile. We may be across the room from each other now, but I still feel this sense of closeness. It fills a void in me I never quite understood. This is what I thought s.e.x would provide, but it never did. The guys were every bit as much strangers to me after the deed as they were before. And now I'm really confused.

He flops down into the chair. "I really want you to be there. Can we find an excuse to have you there?"

"Um..." I rub my face with my hands before I realize it's not a very attractive move. He's found his way into my personal s.p.a.ce in every possible way.