Break It Up Part 18

"I crashed and burned."

"You got Aidan to agree to do some stuff differently. That's a partial win."

"You think he's gonna keep his word?"

"I don't know. I'll ask Jason to look up more about him. Maybe you want Rick to talk to your lawyer, though? Get some pointers for this kind of thing in the future?"

"Not sure Rick would be down with that."

"Then you fire him."

"Not sure I can do that. Ben would vote against it just to spite me."

"Is now a bad time to ask about your management agreement?"

"Our mom oversaw that one being drafted. I mean, she was mad about us getting rid of her, but she didn't want us to get taken to the cleaners."

"Well, that's something at least."

"I never thought I'd hear myself say this, but I miss having her in charge."

"Really?" I think of all his stories about being locked away from the world.

"I don't know." It's jarring how vulnerable he looks right now, and I wonder if this is a recent change or just a side to him he never let me see before.

I put my hands on his arms and again note how muscular he is. His broad chest rises and falls with each breath.

He looks me in the eye and manages a smile, which makes him look like his old self. "Thanks for being here," he says.

"Of course."

He leans down to kiss me, only to break it off when there's a knock at the door.

I pick up the tray of pastries, and once he opens the door to find Rick on the other side, I carry it out.

Rick looks me up and down.

I ignore him and call back over my shoulder, "You want all of these packaged for the flight?"

"You can figure this out, I'm sure."

"Okay, you remember I don't work for you, right?"

"It's pastries. That too much responsibility?"

Rick's attention is on Zach now. I make my escape.

Okay, so the pretend antagonism is kind of fun.

THE ATMOSPHERE on the flight to Geneva is strained, to say the very least. I sit in my corner while Brent films from his seat. The guys of Triple Cross sit, brood, and glare at each other. It's how I imagine being in the wolf exhibit at the zoo would feel while the pack is deciding on a new alpha. Lots of stare downs and the ever-present threat of an all-out fight.

For once I really wish I didn't have to fly on the private jet.

The tension eases briefly as the plane takes off, pressing us all more firmly into our seats. My ears pop as we climb into the sky and feel more at ease when we level off. I hate the steep climb at the beginning of a flight.

Ben gets up from his seat and comes to park himself next to me.

"Hey," he says. For once he doesn't act like he's putting on an act. He doesn't waggle his eyebrows or try to put his hands on me.

"Hi."

"Did you have a nice night last night?"

"Hmmm?" The muscles all up and down my back tense, but I do my best to play it cool.

"Yeah, so something funny happened this morning," he goes on.

I'm pretty sure I don't want to hear this.

"I got home and saw my cousin walking down the hall without a s.h.i.+rt."

So what? I tell myself. That doesn't prove anything.

"I asked him if he'd been with you and if you were any good. If all your experience paid off."

There's no point saying anything. One word in my own defense would be too much. I just look at him as if impatient, wondering what his point is.

"He told me you were a virgin and that if I ever disrespected you like that again he'd throw me out a window."

I'm not sure how to answer him or if I even should answer him.

"Listen, you don't play with his head like that. The whole naivete thing he's got going on? That's not an act."

My mouth is so dry that the skin on my tongue is bound to crack at any minute. I can't swallow because the sides of my throat are stuck together. A million excuses fly through my mind. Brandy and Marissa were jealous and lying when they spilled the beans about me. It's a misunderstanding. Zach made an a.s.sumption. The truth is, though, while I can let lies I didn't start slide past, I can't tell one outright.

"So what's your game?" he asks.

I don't have one. I'm crazy for Zach and trapped. I look down at my hands and see that they're shaking.

"You know that, once he finds out, that's it. He'll never speak to you again, right?"

I nod. "Yeah."

"So what are you doing, Armijo?"

Out of the corner of my eye, I catch Zach's glare. He is not happy to see me talking to Ben.

I sit up straighter and level my gaze at is cousin, making it clear with my body language that there is nothing going on between the two of us. "I never meant to lie to him and I don't want to hurt him," I confess. "I've just...tried to be a good friend to him, and last night he was in a really vulnerable place and-"

"You pounced."

I shake my head. "I didn't. Nothing like that happened."

He looks me straight in the eye.

"He kissed me," I confess. "And I made sure it didn't go too far. I get it, all right? I'm not going to eat him alive."

Ben sits back, and I can't tell if his frown signifies disapproval, disbelief, or disgust. "I thought you and I had something."

"No," I say. "We don't. Not every girl you tweet is going to fall into bed with you."

"Just a certain kind of girl."

"That's not me."

He sets his jaw, and without another word, he gets up and moves away.

Zach stares down at a tablet computer as if he's been reading this entire time, but I'm not fooled and I doubt Ben is either. For that matter, I wonder how much of this Aidan saw.

It's hard to appear at ease for the whole rest of the journey. Fortunately, it isn't a very long flight.

ONCE WE land and they open the cabin door, Ben jogs down the stairs from the plane, turns to face the rest of us, kisses the heels of his hands with his middle fingers extended, and flings his arms out, flipping everyone off. "Lay-tah!" he hollers.

Behind me, I hear people mutter, and I know Ben well enough to know that he's about to do his disappearing act so that he can freak everyone out again. I am so sick and tired of that routine. Before I know it, I'm halfway down the stairs at a run. His figure on the tarmac has slowed to a saunter, so I catch him easily.

"Hey!" I shout.

He stops and pivots. "Hay is for horses."

But at least he stays where he is. I'm grateful that the climate in Geneva is mild. No sweltering humidity. "What is your game?" I ask. "You want to ruin the tour? Mrs. Wechsler no longer waits on you hand and foot and you can't hold it together?"

"You can't control me."

"Yeah, no kidding," I say. "But I'll let you in on a little secret." I motion for him to lean in.

He does obediently.

"Anyone could screw this up," I half holler right into his ear, making him recoil. "Anyone could run off and get drunk and spend all their time sleeping around. You holding up the show doesn't make you special. It makes you selfish and immature. Seriously. This is the kind of c.r.a.p I'd pull when I was in middle school."

"You can't tell me what to do."

"I can't make you do what you should be doing, but h.e.l.l yeah I can tell you what to do. Do your job. You don't like Triple Cross? Then get to work finding another gig. Get your own manager. Record a solo alb.u.m or get into acting or dirt bike racing or whatever you want to do. Don't just create a train wreck for the people who've been your family and had your back for ten years."

"Had my back?" Ben seizes me by the arm and hauls me towards the terminal doors. His grip is like iron and my heart races with panic. I wonder if he's going to hit me. He drags me into the air-conditioned interior, yanks me into a corner, and gets in my face. "Had my back? You know anything about our last manager? Check out any of our old videos, and I'm in long sleeves. You know why?"

I shake my head.

"Because she'd pinch me so hard it left bruises. She clubbed me upside the head once so that I got tinnitus. You know what that is?"

Again I shake my head, wis.h.i.+ng he'd let go of my arm.

"It's when your nerve in your inner ear gets damaged and you get that ringing sound constantly. Kinda hard to be a musician if you can't hear stuff."

"She's gone," I whisper. "These guys, they didn't do that to you." I try to pull my arm free. "Speaking of bruises," I say.

Ben lets go and flexes his hands. "Don't come boss me around like you know something. You don't."

"This is one tour. Finish out this tour and make plans for something else."

"Yeah, that's what she said. Every time I told her I was done. But hey, I'm still here. This is my life, smiling like an idiot while I sing songs written for fourteen-year-olds to sing along to."

By now the rest of the group has caught up, but they don't approach us. Instead they look on while Ben and I face off. Just what I need right now. An audience.

"Then what can I do?" I ask. "How can I help you?"

He laughs, looks me up and down, and then says, loud enough for the whole terminal to hear, "Gimme a piece of what you're giving Zach."

"No," I whisper-shout "Come on. I'm trying to talk to-"

He turns on his heel and strides off. No matter how many times I call after him, he keeps on going.

The rest of the group come to crowd around me.

"What happened?" Logan asks.

"Kyra, did he hurt you?" That's Aidan's voice.

Zach flexes his hands, and I can tell he wants to shove everyone out of the way and take me aside. One thing about Ben's last crack, it let Zach know that I haven't been with Ben.

"I'm fine," I say to Aidan. "But he's not gonna listen to me."

"And he's gone," says Logan, nodding to something outside my field of view.

Great, just great.

"Hey, I tried," I say. I rub my arm where he grabbed me. There's no bruise, but there is a red mark in the shape of his fingers.

"Kyra, stick with me," says Aidan. "Listen, Kyra is my a.s.sistant. She doesn't take orders from anyone. And no one leaves her alone with Ben, all right?" It's as if he feels personally responsible.

"He didn't hurt me," I say.

But Aidan doesn't respond to that. He just gestures for me to walk in front of him as we all make our way to customs. Since our flight originated in Europe, the checks are pretty cursory. Minutes later, we're on the curb, the air cooler and drier than Lisbon but still stinking of vehicle exhaust. I get into the car that Aidan indicates and strap on my seatbelt.

This is only the third city, but the routine of going to a new hotel, getting ready for a show, and then the show itself is already tedious to me. I can't imagine living like this.

"What are we going to do?" says Logan.

With a start, I realize I'm in the same car as him and Zach. Brent sticks his torso in through the door to set up the camera and Zach says, "Please don't film us right now."