Break It Up Part 5

Kyra: No growling. Bad dog.

Zach: Hey, how's your day going?

Kyra: Same. Not much new. Yours?

Zach: I'm in Atlanta, Georgia. I think... Let me check.

Zach: Yeah, this is Atlanta.

Kyra: You forgot what city you're in?

Zach: We never stay in one place very long. If I was at the arena, I'd know, but the hotels all kinda blur together. Except now we stay in fancier rooms. I'm used to the little regular rooms.

Kyra: You didn't used to stay in the penthouse?

Zach: Are you kidding? No, we stayed in little rooms, and Ben, Zach, and I had to share. My mom would rent out a whole floor and we stayed with all the musicians and roadies and everyone.

Kyra: At least you got to know your crew.

Zach: Nah, we never talked to them. Never had any time.

Kyra: That is crazy.

Zach: I guess. I don't know what'd be normal.

Kyra: True. Being in a boy band is abnormal.

Zach: Hey!

Kyra: In a good way.

Zach: Ben wants to try writing songs.

Kyra: Do you guys normally write your own songs?

Zach: No way. Never. I don't know anything about composing music.

Kyra: Really?

Zach: Logan does a little. He writes poetry. He's the only one, really.

Kyra: Oh, okay. I know nothing about music.

Zach: That kind of makes two of us. First time I read a tabloid report of myself, it was all about how I wasn't a real musician and had no musical talent. It was pretty accurate.

Kyra: No it's not. You're one of the most famous singers in the world.

Zach: Autotune Kyra: No way.

Zach: And doubling and aaaaall kinds of tricks.

Kyra: You sing live.

Zach: With a sound engineer and all kinds of special equipment, sure.

Kyra: I bet you sing just fine.

Zach: I don't sing without a whole lot of technical help. Ever. You'll never hear me on an unplugged alb.u.m.

Kyra: You wouldn't be as famous as you are if you didn't have some talent.

Zach: Or a lot of luck.

Ben: Hola chica ;-) Kyra: Tu aerodeslizador esta lleno de anguilas.

Ben: What?

Kyra: Thought you were trying to start a conversation in Spanish.

Ben: What did you just say?

Kyra: It's an ancient proverb of my people.

Ben: What's it mean?

Kyra: It's too complicated to explain.

I'd typed, "Your hovercraft is full of eels."

A WEEK later, I get a phone call from Aidan Greer, the quiet guy who came out with us to the restaurant with Triple Cross. "Kyra, I just lost my intern," he says. "The band leaves on their European tour in four days and I need someone to come work on the movie with me. You game?"

"What?" Okay, not the most articulate response.

"I need a production a.s.sistant. Preferably someone who knows a thing or two about film. I know this is a desperate move here, but are you available? I can pay expenses but no salary."

All I'm hearing, though, is that he wants me to do something with the band for an extended period of time, and that makes my head spin. "I, um... uh, I need to talk to my parents."

"Yes, of course. Any chance you can get me an answer in twenty-four hours?"

I could give him an answer now. I know what my parents will say.

"HUH, OKAY. Well, should we talk to Jason about this?" is my dad's response when I ask if I can go on tour with Triple Cross in Europe while they film their concert movie.

Jen, who's parked herself at the table, shakes her head. "Jason's got all kinds of stress right now. I've never seen him like this. We could probably talk to Dave, though." Dave is Jason's personal a.s.sistant. "Or no," she goes on, "what am I even saying? We just call Mom. She'll know what questions to ask."

"Wait," I say. "Back up. Are you guys actually considering letting me go?"

They both look at me. "Do you not want to?" asks Jen.

"Yeah. Yes, of course I do. I just...why would you let me?"

"Because it's a good opportunity," says my father as if he doesn't understand the question. "You've expressed an interest in film and the entertainment industry before."

"I've expressed an interest in everything," I protest. "Remember me? I never stick with anything I say I'm interested in?"

"You're eighteen," says Jen. "n.o.body's asking you to sign up for a long-term career right now. You're exploring, and this is a good avenue to explore if you're interested."

"Do you think you shouldn't go?" asks my father.

"Of course I shouldn't."

"Why?"

I look at him, then Jen, then him again. "I can't be trusted."

"Kyra," says Jen, "you may be very attached to this idea that you're wild and uncontrollable, but I hate to break it to you. You aren't anymore. You haven't missed curfew in a year."

"I missed it when I spent the night with Zach Wechsler. h.e.l.lo!"

"Nah, that was an accident," says Jen.

"You even kept curfew after you turned eighteen," says my father, "when it didn't apply anymore."

"It didn't? You never told me that."

"You didn't even think to ask," says Jen. "You didn't even try to find a loophole."

"It's true." My father goes to sit down next to his wife. "Sorry, querida, but you've turned into the kind of girl you always used to mock. You even pulled straight A's last year." His words are all lightness and humor, but his expression is serious, as if he's telling me I have cancer. "If you have an exclusive job offer in Europe that might expand your horizons beyond was.h.i.+ng dishes and waiting tables in New Mexico..." He leans forward and fixes me with a deadpan look. "I'm afraid you leave me with little choice. I'll support you."

This is messed up. I pace our living room, not knowing what to say.

Jen shakes her head. "I don't understand. What's so upsetting about this?"

"Yes. Come on. We're saying yes and we're trying to be funny," says my father. "Is it my humor?"

"It could be your sense of humor," says Jen.

"Is it that scary?"

"She's agitated. Look at her."

Boots, the cat, sits on the arm of the couch and watches this exchange like it's a tennis match, his gaze bobbing back and forth.

"Kyra?" presses my father.

"It's Triple Cross," I say. "They're the hottest boy band ever and..."

"And what?" My father shrugs.

I shoot Jen a pleading look. She takes the cue and puts her hand over my father's. "Give us a moment?" she says.

My father nods and slips out of the room.

How is it I never noticed that my parents can read me just fine? I spent high school certain that they never knew the first thing about me.

"What is it?" Jen asks.

"I have a ma.s.sive crush on Zach Wechsler."

She nods. "I know. So you think that'd be too much for you to take, being near him?"

"I'm afraid I'll do something stupid like sleep with him or one of the other band members and end up hating myself."

"Kyra...you're not that person anymore."

"I slept with Chase Rollins," I blurt out. "When Jason was filming The Pact. I totally let him seduce me and take me back to his trailer and-"

"Mmmm. My shocked face." She points to her expressionless, deadpan countenance. "Who didn't sleep with Chase Rollins when they got the chance? He had the worst reputation."

"So you can't trust me."

"I couldn't back then, no. And I can't trust Chase Rollins, but I knew that. I know the type. And now he's on a reality TV show that gets some of the lowest ever ratings, and there, sweetie, is your payback. That's what you get."

"Jen, if I'm on tour with three of the hottest guys on the planet, I will screw it up. You know me. I'll sleep with one or more of them and the media will find out about me and my past and-"

"Kyra, listen to me. You may be over the whole sleeping around thing, but you've still got some confidence issues. You are well qualified for this intern job if you want it."

"You can't let me go."

"I can't make you go. But maybe you should make yourself. Maybe you need to see once and for all that, really, you can handle this. You can make good decisions and do the right thing. You are a good person."

I think about Zach and that penetrating stare of his. I think of what it felt like just to be near him and how I can't help but picture us sleeping beside each other.

I shake my head. "No way. Things with Zach ended, they were okay. He texts me and is really nice...and if he got to know me, he wouldn't be that nice."

At that, Jen's expression grows serious. "Any guy who thinks less of you for your past doesn't deserve to know you. You're better off without him."

"I don't need a high school guidance counselor's advice," I say. "I need you to level with me."

"This is me leveling with you. I hate to break it to you, but you're a grown up now. No one's going to forbid you to do stuff anymore. Unless it's illegal."

"But it's not fair. I only just figured out how to actually not do the stuff people forbid me to do."

"Such is life." She smirks at me. "Seriously, though, I think you'll be fine. And who knows? Guys like Zach do date, you know."

"Oh, don't even." I resume pacing. Boots watches me as if there's something fascinating about the way I am tugging at my hair. "If there was even a rumor about me, and if anyone dug into my past..."

"Well, true." Jen exhales like a balloon deflating. "There is that. You do not want to get on the wrong side of the media."