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"No," said the man.
The priest was put out of countenance.
"Well, I suppose you are not lying. Why didn't you sin? It is unnatural. After all," he insisted, "you are a man."
The sick man was bewildered and began to get excited. Seeing this, the priest said:
"Do not be surprised, my son, if my questions are direct and to the point. I ask you in all simplicity, as is my august duty as a priest.
Answer me in the same simple spirit, and you will enter into communion with G.o.d," he added, not without kindness.
"She is a young girl," said the old man. "I took her under my protection when she was quite a child. She shared the hards.h.i.+ps of my traveller's life, and took care of me. I married her before my death because I am rich and she is poor."
"Was that the only reason--no other reason at all?"
He fixed his look searchingly on the dying man's face, then said, "Eh?"
smiling and winking an eye, almost like an accomplice.
"I love her," said the man.
"At last, you are confessing!" cried the priest. He buried his eyes in the eyes of the dying man. The things he said fairly hit him as he lay there.
"So you desired this woman, the flesh of this woman, and for a long time committed a sin in spirit? Didn't you? Eh?
"Tell me, when you were travelling together, how did you arrange for rooms and beds in the hotels?
"You say she took care of you? What did she have to do for you?"
The two men scanned each other's faces keenly, and I saw the misunderstanding between them growing.
The dying man withdrew into himself and became hardened, incredulous before this stranger, with the vulgar appearance, in whose mouth the words of G.o.d and truth a.s.sumed a grotesque aspect.
However, he made an effort:
"If I have sinned in spirit, to use your words," he said, "it proves that I have not sinned in reality, and why should I repent of what was suffering pure and simple?"
"No theories now. We are not here for theorising. I tell you, a sin committed in spirit is committed in intention, and therefore in effect, and must be confessed and redeemed. Tell me how often you succ.u.mbed to guilty thoughts. Give me details."
"But I resisted," moaned the unfortunate man. "That is all I have to say."
"That is not enough. The stain--you are now convinced, I presume, of the justice of the term--the stain ought to be washed out by the truth."
"Very well," said the dying man. "I confess I have committed the sin, and I repent of it."
"That is not a confession, and is none of my business," retorted the priest. "Now tell me, under exactly what circ.u.mstances did you yield to temptation with that person, to the suggestions of the evil spirit?"
The man was swept by a wave of rebellion. He half rose and leaned on his elbow, glaring at the stranger, who returned his look steadily.
"Why have I the evil spirit in me?" he demanded.
"You are not the only one. All men have it."
"Then it is G.o.d who put it into them, since it is G.o.d who made them."
"Ah, you are a debater! Well, if it gives you pleasure, I will answer you. Man has both the spirit of good and the spirit of evil in him, that is to say, the possibility of doing the one or the other. If he succ.u.mbs to evil, he is d.a.m.ned. If he triumphs over it, he is rewarded. To be saved, he must earn salvation by struggling with all his powers."
"What powers?"
"Virtue and faith."
"And if he does not have enough virtue and faith, is that his fault?"
"Yes, because that comes from his having too much iniquity and blindness in his soul."
The man sat up again, seized by a new fit of anger which consumed him like a fever.
"Ah," he said, "original sin! There's nothing that can excuse the suffering of good people on earth. It is an abomination."
The priest looked at the rebellious man blankly.
"How else could souls be tried?" he said quite calmly.
"Nothing can excuse the suffering of the good."
"G.o.d's designs are inscrutable."
The dying man flung out his emaciated arms. His eyes became hollow.
"You are a liar!"
"Enough," said the priest. "I have listened patiently to your ramblings and feel sorry for you. But there's no good arguing. You must prepare to appear before G.o.d, from whom you seem to have lived apart. If you have suffered, you will be consoled in His bosom. Let that suffice for you."
The invalid fell back and lay still for a while. He remained motionless under the white spread, like a reclining sepulchral statue of marble with a face of bronze.
He regained his voice.
"G.o.d cannot console me."
"My son, my son, what are you saying?"
"G.o.d cannot console me, because He cannot give me what I want."
"Ah, my poor child, how far gone you are in your blindness! Why did you have me summoned?"
"I had hopes, I had hopes."
"Hopes? Hopes of what?"
"I do not know. The things we hope for are always the things we do not know."