Snow Angel Part 11

It was dim in the tent. There were several rows of cots, mostly full. She found William Cleary and picked her way over to him. He had his eyes closed and was mumbling. Elizabeth looked down at the person he was praying for. The sheet was drawn up over the face.

Elizabeth asked, "Who was he? Did you know him?"

William slowly pulled the sheet down to reveal Mary-Margaret's face.

Elizabeth gasped. "Oh, no a what happened?"

The preacher just shook his head. "A man brought her in. He said he tried to save her but she drowned in the rapids, fell overboard."

"How terrible! Did you speak to her husband? A dark Frenchman?"

William shook his head. "A big fellow brought her in. He was looking for the husband. Did you know her?"

She stared down at the white face, her stomach rolling. She shook her head. "I met her a once. She was kind to me." Looking up into the preacher's face Elizabeth said in a helpless and small voice, "She seemed so strong."

Mr. Cleary put an arm around her shoulder as they stood staring at the dead woman's face. She started to reach out to touch her and then pulled her hand back. Mary-Margaret had been so full of life, so determined. It was hard to believe anything like this had happened to her. The reality of their circ.u.mstances was sobering.

William squeezed Elizabeth's arm rea.s.suringly. "Come, there is nothing more we can do here."

Elizabeth studied William Cleary out of the corner of her eyes as they walked. Her gut told her that here was a man who could be trusted, and she'd seen nothing to cause her to think otherwise since meeting him. She would have to risk it. The twins would just make a mess of it. She lowered her voice. "I need to talk to you. It's important."

His focus s.h.i.+fted to her face and sharpened. "All right," he said softly, "let's take a walk."

Elizabeth steered them away from the sh.o.r.e where she had seen Ross. Talking over the din of hammering and sawing, she explained. "I saw Skook.u.m just a few minutes ago and he was talking to someone a someone I know." She looked at the ground. "This man a I have reason to believe he isn't here for the gold. He's come for me." She looked pleadingly into Mr. Cleary's eyes, hoping a man of G.o.d didn't have some special sense to know she was telling only part of the truth. "I can't stay here." She rushed on in anxious agitation. "I have to go on to Dawson alone. But I need your help."

"Elizabeth, have you done something that you need to ask forgiveness for?"

Her shoulders slumped. She needed some practical help, not a sermon. "Many things, I'm afraid. And I will, when this is all over." She gave him a sad smile. "I'm afraid it's too early to ask for forgiveness."

"It's never too early, Elizabeth. On your best day, that most perfect day when you think you've done everything right, it will be no better to Him than this day."

Some part of her heard him, latched onto the hope he held out to her that G.o.d would love her no matter what she did, but another part was scrambling to save herself, making her grind her teeth. "First I must leave this place. Will you help me?"

He laid a hand on her shoulder, looking at her with a.s.surance. "What can I do?"

"As soon as you can, gather my supplies together and take them to a behind the hospital tent. Stash them under a blanket there, and as soon as it's dusk, I'll retrieve them."

William Cleary was frowning. "I can do that, but Elizabeth, you shouldn't go alone." He was silent for a moment. "That fellow, the one who brought in Mary-Margaret, he said he would be leaving after he found his supplies and purchased a boat. He seemed in a hurry too. I think he would take you along if you take our raft. He was a good man. I'd trust him with you." He looked at Elizabeth sternly. "Don't try to pa.s.s yourself off as a boy, though. It wouldn't take him long to figure it out, and he strikes me as the type who values honesty."

Elizabeth shrugged. "All right, but what about you and the others? Skook.u.m will be furious if you give me the raft. How will you go on without it?"

"Don't concern yourself with us. We'll find our way. I have extra funds, and many are turning back at every camp. There are always boats to be bought." He gazed around. "Anyway, I feel needed in this place." He shrugged. "It's a mystery how G.o.d's work unfolds for each of us, Elizabeth."

A FEW HOURS later, Elizabeth met William Cleary behind the hospital tent. He handed her a handkerchief full of warm flapjacks. "I have the raft packed with your supplies. I haven't had any trouble thus far. The twins are somewhere playing a game of cards, and I haven't seen Skook.u.m all afternoon. He may be fis.h.i.+ng."

"What about the man you told me about? Has he agreed to take me?"

William nodded, pointing toward the lake. "He is waiting with the raft beyond that stand of trees. I will take you to him."

The raft was nestled among tall gra.s.ses, s.h.i.+elded from obvious view. She really didn't want to get on another boat. Just one night's sleep on solid ground would have been nice, but she had no choice. A dark shadow was hunting her, and she didn't know if its name was Ross or fear, but she would stay ahead of it for as long as she was able. Elizabeth strained her neck toward the water, across the gra.s.ses. A man was leaning down, roping something a his movements sure, causing a flicker of recognition in her. He stood and turned just as she reached the edge of the bank.

Noah a he had come for her.

Tears instantly sprang up in her eyes. Emotions rose so high that she felt she might choke on them. The world started to tilt, making her dizzy, then blackness began on the edges of her vision until it completely closed in. She forgot to put her head down between her knees in her shock. She forgot everything except that he'd come and what that must mean. She sank to the ground in a crumpled heap.

NOAH HAD HEARD a startled sound and witnessed the collapse. He scrambled up the sh.o.r.e. "What happened to him?"

William Cleary grimaced, looking up at Noah from his crouched position next to Elizabeth. "I didn't want to have to be the one to tell you this, Mr. Wesley, but he is a she. And I believe she's fainted."

Noah crouched down and looked into the woman's face. His hand reached out involuntarily as his heart started its heavy drumming. He wiped the smudged dirt from her face and whispered, emotion clogging his throat, "Elizabeth. No wonder I couldn't find you."

"You know her?" William asked, alarmed.

Noah hung his head for a moment and then looked up at the preacher. "Yes, I know her. I've come for her. She's going to be my wife."

"Your wife? Do you know about the trouble she's in?"

Noah's eyes narrowed. "I know a man named Ross is looking for her. I don't know why, but I aim to find out. What do you know about it?"

William Cleary stood, patted Noah on the shoulder. "Only that she needs someone like you. She'll come to soon enough, and if she is fighting you, it might be providential that she's fainted. Let's get her to the raft, quickly."

Noah picked up Elizabeth and carried her to the raft, laying her on a blanket under the raft's shaded side. Turning, he said, "This is a good raft. It's yours, isn't it?"

"It was hers as well. She was a valuable member of our group." He smiled. "She's the one that insisted we build the lean-to on the raft for cover. It was one of many things she brought to us."

"Let me pay you for it." Noah reached into a pouch under his coat.

William Cleary shook his head. "I have money if we should need to buy a boat. I think I'll have the twins build another one and use the time to stall this Ross fellow. I believe G.o.d wants us to be here for a few days."

Noah didn't question his words; he only nodded and shook hands with the man, feeling like he'd found a friend who understood. Taking a wood pole in his hand, he pushed off the bank while the preacher shoved. The raft floated out onto the glossy lake. Noah busied himself getting them quickly downstream. He couldn't seem to look at her again. It did something to him that he couldn't quite identify, so he concentrated on the raft and poling down the river into the long stretch called Thirty-Mile.

A bald eagle screeched from its perch atop a tree and spread its wings, one second cleaving and the next soaring, leaving in its wake a swaying branch and falling leaves from the force of its impetus. Noah watched the great bird until it was just a black spot in the sky as it gained the height of mountaintops. Here was magnificence, he thought, breathing in the awe of the grace, the majesty. "How great you are," he whispered to the Creator.

Even though it was evening, the pale sunlight hung on. It was the time of year for light, the time for staying up and soaking the sun's rays deep into the skin, into one's bones in preparation for the inevitable long winter to come. In Alaska this was a magical time, when the sun rose and stayed just above the horizon, making an arc around them in the sky. It was a time for renewal, and they alla"plants and animals and mana"lingered with the light, not wanting to waste it on sleep, not able to completely forget the cold darkness to come. Noah would hunt and walk his property well past midnight this time of year when the land would see only a couple of hours of darkness in the wee hours of the night. But not this year; this year he had another mission. He glanced back at her still asleep and wondered if he should wake her. But something told him not to, he needed to wait. And wait some more.

With a gentle, warming breeze and the soft current all around them, it was a leisurely ride. The only hindrance was the occasional boulder in the water or mound of earth to navigate around. Noah gazed at a part of the landscape he had never seen before, the beauty and immensity never ceasing to astound him. The calm water was soothing to his turbulent emotions.

He'd found her! A part of him rejoiced, and yet another part made him ask what had possessed him to chase a wisp of a woman into this land. He knew the answer, but he didn't know if it was the right one. All he knew was that when he quieted himself, all he could hear was the rejoicing of his heart. I found her a found her a found her.

"Noah, is it really you?"

The question was as soft as a whisper, but it hit him in the stomach like a swift kick. He turned from his vigil and stared at her. She was sitting half-up, rubbing her eyes with a small, pale hand. Her hat had fallen off to reveal her thick ma.s.s of wavy haira"the same hair that when she wore it down and loose made his stomach do a slow turn. Rising, she stood and moved toward him. She looked gooda"so good and sweet. It was all he could do not to reach for her.

"Where's your coat?" he asked.

Elizabeth looked around her. "I'm not cold," she answered softly. "Noah, I can't believe it's you. Why are you here?"

She didn't sound particularly glad to see him. Maybe she had been glad to be rid of him. "Seems I just keep turning up when you need me most." It came out sarcastically and when she smiled at the truth of it, he growled inwardly.

"That's true. No one has ever saved me like you have."

Her eyes were all softness, and he felt a tightening in his chest.

"I can't believe you came all this way. Did Cara put you up to it? How is she?"

She moved alongside him and grasped his upper arm, smiling happily into his eyes. He felt a heady rush of excitement.

"No, I came on my own, but she was worried about you. She and Will both. She had her baby the day after you left. A girl."

Elizabeth beamed. "Oh, Will must be so proud. Is Cara well? Did she have any trouble?" She shook her head, still clinging to his arm in a way that made him want to wrap himself around her. "Oh, you probably wouldn't know all those details."

"As a matter of fact," he said, gritting, "I delivered the baby."

Her eyes grew round. "What?"

Noah shrugged. "Will was gone, looking for you. We couldn't find a doctor in time. I'd just arrived to a see you and found the post locked up. After breaking down the door, I found Cara trying to deliver the little package all on her own. There wasn't time to do anything but help."

Her shoulders slumped as she looked into the water. "It's my fault. Will would have been there if I hadn't left."

Noah laughed. "It was a good thing Will wasn't there. If I remember right, he wasn't her favorite person at the time." When Elizabeth looked confused, he changed the subject. "Elizabeth, why did you leave so suddenly?"

She turned her head away. "I a I had a chance to join Charlie McKay's party and I took it. You know all I ever really wanted was to come here a to be a part of this."

"Yes, but I thought we had an agreement. I thought you were going to prospect my land with me." He thought of Mary-Margaret and said his next thoughts out loud. "This isn't any place for a woman."

She turned on him. He should have expected it by now, but it came like a surprise attack. "I've just as much right to be here as anyone. I deserve a chance." Then she spoke fiercer, to match the fire in her eyes, "I deserve a chance." She looked down, shaking, then back up at him. "Why don't you just admit ita"you don't want to be here. I didn't ask you to come for me, Noah."

Her gaze locked onto his. What he read in her eyes he could no longer endure. All the pent-up fears and frustrations of the past month exploded inside him. Reaching out, he pulled her to him and lowered his head. With an urgency born of desperation to reach her, to show her, he kissed her like he'd dreamed of kissing her for so long. Noah forgot the river, the raft, the night sun twinkling at them, the mountains, the land a his land even a he forgot everything except the woman in his arms. He drowned himself in the taste and feel and touch of her. It was like coming homea"to an explosion.

When he finally lifted his head and looked into her eyes, she flushed and sighed softly, "Oh."

Noah's voice was firm. "I'll take you to Dawson City. But after you've had your fill of this blasted gold mining notion, I'm taking you homea"as my wife."

She looked blankly at him for a moment, myriad emotions playing over her features. Finally, her face grew hard. "No," she said simply.

Noah was stunned. "No? Just a no?"

"I can't marry you, Noah."

He took hold of her shoulders, gripping them firmly so that she had to look up at him. "Why? Tell me why not." Softer, pleading, he demanded, "Tell me you don't love me." His throat tightened as he watched her struggle with the question.

She looked away. "I'm a Noah, I'm already married." She looked back into his eyes, her face hardened now. "That man, Ross Brandon, the one looking for me. He's my husband. I a I lied about my name being Smith. It's been many things, but never Smith."

The air whooshed out of him as though he'd been punched. His stomach rolled, the crumbling of his heart overshadowing it all. Noah wished he had been punched. G.o.d help him, he was in love with a married woman.

ELIZABETH FELT SICK. She watched his face turn ashen before he dropped his hold on her and turned away. Turning away herself, she fought back tears. It was better this way. He had a right to someone better. She wouldn't let him be destroyed.

"Why?" he croaked out. "Why didn't you tell me? And why aren't you with him?"

Her emotions switched off and the lies came easy. "I've been running away from him. He beat me a and more. I didn't think he would follow me here," her voice dropped, "but he has."

Noah turned around. "Elizabeth, why didn't you tell me all this?"

"Why? What can you do? You can't save me this time, Noah Wesley. If he comes for mea"and he will, I know that nowa"there's nothing you can do about it." She turned her back on him, burning her safety net and knowing it, but there was no other way. It was the only decent thing she had ever done in her life. She would save Noah from herself if it killed her. And it very well might.

The silence was stifling on the little raft as the night hastened on. Elizabeth didn't know if she could endure it any longer. She s.h.i.+vered and hugged herself and adjusted her sitting position. It was a tranquil stretch of the journey. Silt from the Teslin River slipped into the water, giving it a low, hissing sound that droned in the background. They sat in stillness, bathed in the long twilight, filled and straining with longing toward one another. It lent an eerie feel to the journey, as though the torturous silence would go on forever and the combined aching of their hearts would never stop.

"It's getting cool. Why don't you put on your coat?"

His voice was so deep, struck such a chord within her, that she closed her eyes and inhaled, soaking it in. Finally, she managed, "It's not among my things. I must have left it behind."

She heard him stir and then felt a blanket being wrapped around her shoulders. She turned her head slowly to look at him and felt such sadness, saw only sadness in his eyes. On a breath she said. "If you would get angry and shout at me, it would make this easier."

"I am angry. You should have told me, then maybe I wouldn't have a"

"Wouldn't have what?"

He shook his head. "It doesn't matter. It probably wouldn't have made any difference." He motioned toward the lean-to. "Why don't you get some sleep. We're on calm water now, but there are bound to be more rapids. I'll wake you then."

Elizabeth shook her head and looked into his tired eyes, seeing his wretchedness. "I couldn't sleep. Why don't you rest, and I'll keep watch."

Noah ran a hand through his hair. "You sure?"

She nodded.

After he lay down she said softly, "Noah?"

"Yeah?"

"I guess you'll head back home at the first camp we get to?"

He lifted his head and rested it against his palm. After a moment's hesitation, he said, "I'll see you to Dawson City first. I don't want you going alone."

She tried to express her gratefulness. She tried to make herself turn around and tell him the trutha"all of it. Instead, she just stared out at the dark water and forced the tears to remain behind the knot in her throat.

July 20, 1895 Dear Mrs. Rhodes, I regret that I have little news on our search. Nothing has opened in the case to lead me to believe that Elizabeth is in New York, Illinois, or the vicinity. I have had many cases over the years and all have been resolved but this one. Sometimes I, too, despair over it, but something about your description of her in that first letter, when she was such a young child and still with you, it haunts me. I cannot give up.

This morning, in a moment of prayer, I felt the urging to expand my search. Upon finis.h.i.+ng this letter, I will broaden the investigation, placing ads in various newspapers across the country, expanding toward the south and further west. I will also continue to try to uncover the name of the adoptive parents. Elizabeth must be approaching eighteen now and has perhaps left her home and journeyed out on her own. Regardless, in this last great effort to serve you, I pledge to leave no stone left unturned.

I remain your devoted servant.