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From my seat I still had a good view, despite the middle-aged man who thought I.
was looking at him, and suddenly the walls of the Acropolis were lit by soft, moving lights, s.h.i.+fting from pale rose to green to blue. "Look," I said.
Zachary turned around in his chair, and back. "It's pretty vulgar." (Rhea would have agreed with him there.) "But I'll take you tomorrow night if you like."
Again, I didn't know what to say. Yes? Kate says boys don't like it if you're too eager. The only person I'd ever dated was Renny, and I'm not sure having pizza with Renny even qualified as a date. He was an intern, and I was a kid who listened to him talk.
I pushed the thought of Renny away. If I was going to go out with Zachary the next day, I ought to know something more about him. "When you finish getting culture and go back to college, where are you going? What are you planning to be?"
"One at a time," he said. "I'm going back to UCLA, and I'll be studying law.
My pa's a corporate lawyer, and I mean a multinational corporate lawyer, with his finger in pies on every continent."
As I thought: money. I watched the lights s.h.i.+mmer on the hillside and then blink off.
"I'm taking this year off to find out what I really want. I'll tell you what I.
want right now. I want to spend tomorrow with you."
47.With me. This extremely gorgeous-looking young man wanted to spend the day with me. It sounded a lot better than going on a bus tour with a lot of people I didn't know. I wasn't sure I trusted Zachary. But I didn't have any reason to trust a lot of strangers on a bus, either.
"Here we are, both on our own"-Zachary reached across the table and lightly touched the tips of his fingers to mine-"and I think we can have a good time together."
Not only had I not mentioned to Zachary that my parents had no idea I was on my own, I also did not tell him about Sandy and Rhea.
He went on. "When I saw you in the Square this afternoon you reminded me of a wild pony, ready to shy off if anybody frightened you. You still have that look, as though you might suddenly leap up from your chair and vanish. You're sophisticated enough to be eating alone on the roof of the King George and yet you have an innocence I haven't seen in anyone your age in I don't know how long."
For want of anything better to say, I murmured, "I've lived on islands most of my life."
"I was expecting to take off for Corfu tomorrow, but I'd much rather stay here and show you around. I'll rent a car so we can go off into the countryside."
I was flattered. I suspected my cheeks were pink. Kate collects male animals as I collect specimens for Daddy, going out in the boat to get squid or whatever he needs. n.o.body anywhere near my age had ever wanted to spend a day with me before. "That sounds lite fun. But I think right now I'd better go to bed and get a good night's sleep if I'm to be awake for you tomorrow."
"I'll take you to your room," he said.
"No. Thanks. I'll go myself."
48."Don't you trust me?"
I shook my head. "It isn't you."
"You are a wild little animal," he said. "I'm not a wolf."
I stood up. "What time shall we meet tomorrow?"
"Ten okay?"
"Sure."
"I'll pick you up. What's your room number?"
"I'll meet you in the lobby."
"Okay, okay, pretty Pol, I suppose you have every right to be suspicious of some guy who's just picked you up. I'm staying at the Hilton, by the way, because it has a better view. Wait till you see it. Lobby of the King George. Ten a.m.
tomorrow."
"I look forward to it," I said. I was glad I'd already signed for my meal, so I.
could just walk away, without looking back.
The view from my room at night was as beautiful as it had been in the full suns.h.i.+ne, although the son et lumiere show was long over. I looked at the ancient stones and wondered what all those centuries did to our own troubled time-put it in more cosmic perspective perhaps?
But even if the Acropolis speaks of the pettiness and brevity of our mortal lives, while our lives are going on they matter.
The ancient stones seemed lit from within. Sometimes I think the past has its own radiance. I turned from the balcony, switched on the lights, and ordered my breakfast for the next morning, hanging the breakfast chit on the outside of the door. Breakfast in the room was my Uncle Sandy's suggestion. He and Rhea like to keep their 49 /.
mornings quiet when they're traveling, and I thought I might like that, too-continental breakfast, cafe au lait and croissants, and a book. It sounded good to me.
The bed had been turned down while I was at dinner, and it looked so comfortable that I got undressed right away and climbed in, pus.h.i.+ng the pillows up behind me, dutifully writing in the journal for school. Most certainly the day in Athens had not been in the least what I had expected. No Sandy and Rhea; instead, a boy called Zachary. That was not the kind of thing to write down.
I.
thought for a moment, then described the view from my room and mentioned Aristeides, the inflexibly just, to prove that travel is truly educational.
And then the phone rang.
I was not entirely surprised to have it be my Uncle Dennys calling from Boston.
Sandy and Dennys have the special closeness of twins.
All Dennys wanted to know was that I was okay, that I wasn't lonely or frightened. He and Sandy use the long-distance phone as though it were local.
They both feel that it's very important to keep in touch. And I suppose they can both afford it. Nevertheless, it awes me. He asked, "What are your plans for tomorrow?"
"I'm going sightseeing."
"All alone?"
"No, I met this guy from California who knows a lot about Athens, and he's going to show me around."
"Are you sure he's okay?"
"Who can be sure about anyone? I can take care of myself."
"Sure you can, Pol, but be careful."
"I'll be careful. Don't worry."
"Sorry Sandy got held up, but maybe it'll be good for you to have this time on your own."
50."Don't tell Mother and Daddy-"
"Never fear. Sandy's already made me promise. Strikes me he's being more protective of them than he is of you."
"He just wants me to grow up," I said.
"You will. You already are, in many ways." We said goodbye, and I felt warmed by Dennys's call. Sandy had promised me that what Max had called him about wouldn't go any further, he wouldn't tell anyone, even his twin. And I knew he hadn't.
When I put the phone down I looked at my school journal and decided I was too tired to write any more. I slid down in bed and turned out the light. It was cool enough, with the balcony windows open to the night breeze, for me to snuggle under the covers. I plummeted into sleep, and slept deep down dark for a couple of hours, and then woke up and felt myself floating to the surface. At first I thought I was in my familiar bed at home. But I heard street noises instead of the surf rolling and the wind in the palmettos. I was alone in a hotel in Athens. Sandy and Rhea were still in Was.h.i.+ngton, but Zachary Gray was not far away in the Hilton. Amazing.
What time was it at home? Never mind. I'd better get body and mind on Greek time. I leaned on my elbow and peered at the travel alarm. Midnight. I lay down.
Wrapped the covers about me. Too hot. Pushed them down. Too cold. Slipped into half sleep. Half dream.
Renny.
Queron Renier.
(With a name like Queron, who wouldn't be called Renny?) Like Zachary, Renny was tall, taller than I. Most of the kids at CowpertownHigh were shorter. Zachary was sophisticated and exotic. Renny was serious and nice- 51.looking in a completely unspectacular way. His light brown hair bleached in the summer from sun and salt water. His grey-blue eyes peered behind thick lenses in heavy frames. In the dream he was standing beside me on the open verandah at Beau Allaire, wearing his white doctor's coat, with his stethoscope dangling out of his pocket, looking like a young doctor on TV. He said, 'An intern's life is h.e.l.l,' the way he had said it to me at least a dozen times, but in a tone of voice that belied his words. Renny loved being an intern. He loved the hospital and everything about it. When I first met him I a.s.sumed that he was at the M. A. Horne Hospital because it was the only place he could get. Renny is from Charleston, and there are bigger hospitals in Charleston. There are bigger hospitals in Savannah and Jacksonville. Or Richmond or Baltimore.
In the dream he sat on the white rail of the verandah. 'You watch out for this guy who's picked you up. I don't trust him.'
'I can handle him,' I said.
'You're much too sure of yourself, Polyhymnia O'Keefe. Pride goeth before a fall.'
'I'm not really sure of myself,' I said. 'It's just a front.' It was. I'm sure of myself as far as my brain is concerned. I've got a good one, thanks to my genetic background. But in every other area of life I'm insecure. I can talk easily and comfortably with adults, but not with kids my own age.
'Watch it,' Renny said, his voice echoing in the dream. 'Watch it... watch it.
His warning woke me and brought me back from Beau Allaire to my bed in the King George. I was hot, so I got up and went out onto the balcony, and the night sky was that extraordinary blue which was deep behind 52.the stars. Greek blue. Blue and gold by day; blue and silver by night. I wondered how much human nature had actually changed in the thousands of years since the Acropolis was built, and if all that had happened to me was so extraordinary after all.
I'd seen Renny every week or so during the past winter and summer. Going out with him for barbecue or pizza on his rare free evenings, and listening to him talk about tropical medicine, was a good antidote to not being asked to a dance at the Cowpertown High School, but that's all it meant, until a couple of weeks ago.
Renny was still an antidote, but for something far more cataclysmic than not being asked to a dance, or watching my cousin Kate go off with a bunch of kids, usually including Xan, while I stayed home. Kate is everything Mother and Daddy would have liked me to be. She's not short, but she's shorter than I am, and when she goes to a dance she doesn't loom over the boys. And she's beautiful, full and beautiful. I'm no longer the same measurement all round; I have reasonable curves both in front and behind, which is a big improvement over the pole I used to be, but Kate has pheromones which draw boys to her like honey.
I.
wasn't exactly jealous of Kate; I didn't even want to change places with her; I.
was just wistful.
The light on the Acropolis was different now than it had been earlier, a deeper, darker blue, with many of the city lights extinguished around it, though not all. Cities never go completely to sleep. While they are alive, that is. I stood looking at the pearly light on the stone until I was chilly. Then I went back to bed. Edges of dawn were outlining the windows as I slid into sleep. I didn't wake up till there was a knock on the door.
Breakfast. I was wide awake in an instant. Breakfast 53.in Athens. I grabbed my bathrobe and rushed to open the door. A nice young waiter who looked like pictures of Greek statues carried in a breakfast tray which he took out to the balcony. There was a pot of coffee, a pitcher of hot milk, a dish with croissants and toast, jam, honey, and b.u.t.ter.
When we lived on Gaea and school was whenever Mother and Daddy decided we should start lessons, breakfast was unhurried, too. We fixed trays and ate in our rooms and emerged into the day when we felt like it, some of us getting up at dawn, some not till seven or even eight. But at Benne Seed we were on a schedule; we had to get to the mainland in time for that school bus. So, though Mother set breakfast out and we were free to get our own and eat it whenever we liked, we couldn't help b.u.mping into each other. If Mother and Daddy could have gone on teaching us I might have loved Benne Seed as much as I loved Gaea. It was Cowpertown and the high school which depressed me. The island itself was home.
So breakfast alone in Athens reminded me of breakfast on Gaea, though it was much more elegant. I thanked the waiter in Greek which was, if not flawless, at least understandable, and he beamed at me. "Parakalo" he said, and then he pointed to the Acropolis with the morning light bringing the stones to life, gabbled at me in Greek, beamed again, and left.
The telephone rang, jolting me. I went back to the room and answered, and why was I surprised when it was Zachary Gray?
"I just wanted to make sure we were getting together today."
He was worried about me backing out? "Of course."
o "Have you had breakfast?"
54."I'm having it right now, out on the balcony, enjoying the view."
"We'll have lunch together somewhere, then, though I want you to see the view from my balcony first. Can you be in your lobby at ten sharp?"
I looked at my watch. It was just after eight. "Sure. See you at ten."
The sun was so bright as it slanted across the balcony that I hitched my chair back into the shadows so I could see to read without being half blinded. The croissants were crumbly and delicious, and the cafe au lait was good, much better than the sweet thick stuff. Instead of reverting to childhood, having breakfast alone in Greece as we used to do in Portugal, I suddenly felt very grownup.
Absurd. Why did it take being alone in Athens to make me feel mature enough to look at human nature and feel part of it? Not better. Not worse. Just part.
I was reading a book Sandy had given me, about Epidaurus, where he was planning to take me. There's a magnificent theatre there, though we were going to be too late in the season to see any plays. And there were holy precincts in Epidaurus where, back in the high days of Greek civilization, people were brought to be healed, some with physical ailments, some with mental ones. There were really interesting things in the book. The snake pit, for instance. Those snakes in the pit where really sick mental patients were put weren't just snakes, which would have been enough to send them out of their minds for good; they were snakes with a strong electric charge. So it was, you might say, the first electric-shock 55.treatment, and probably no more inhuman than any kind of electric-shock treatment. I wondered what Renny would think of it.
The brilliant sun dazzling off the stones of the buildings and onto my stretched-out legs and arms was a shock treatment in its own way. My spirits lifted, and I took the last bit of apricot jam and licked it off the spoon.
The sun tingled against my legs, which had a good tan from summer. Unlike a lot of redheads, I do tan, as long as I'm careful and do it slowly. I also have long, straight toes, probably because I've worn sandals or gone barefoot most of my life. Feet are usually not the prettiest part of the body, but my feet were one of the things I could feel pleased about.
In Epidaurus, before sick people could go into the sacred precincts for healing, they had to stay outside the gates to pray, to be purged of bad feelings, anger, resentment, lack of forgiveness. Only then could they go in to the priests.
I looked at the words: anger, resentment, lack of forgiveness, and in the brilliant light the letters seemed to wriggle on the page like little snakes.
I.
needed that purging. n.o.body could get rid of all those bad feelings but me, myself. The warmth of the sun on the balcony, and those words leaping off the page at me, had made me see that much. Or maybe it was getting away from everything and everybody so I could see it in perspective.
'You'll like Krhis Ghose,' Max had said, showing me a snapshot of a thin man who looked something like Nehru. We were up on the second-floor verandah outside her bedroom, where she had comfortable Chinese wicker furniture, and the breeze from the ocean, plus the 56.ceiling fan, plus mosquito coils, kept the insects to a minimum.
'Is he a Hindu or a Moslem?'
Max fanned herself slowly with an old-fas.h.i.+oned palm-leaf fan. 'A Christian.
One.who actually is one. A person of total integrity. Why we get along so well I'm not sure, but I count him among my closest friends.'
'How did you meet?'
'In Bombay. Much against my will, I was dragged to a lecture Krhis was giving on the connection between religious intolerance and land boundaries. And instead of being bored, I was fascinated, and we went out with him afterwards and talked all night. He's come through h.e.l.l. Saw his wife and child shot. G.o.d, they do keep shooting each other in that part of the world. But he's come out on the other side, somehow or other. Without bitterness.'