Tallie's Knight Part 35

"M'lord's favourite," Harris announced.

"Cook prepared it especially."

Tallie glanced at her husband. He looked almost as pleased as Ricardo, though he was trying not to show it. She hid a smile. All these months and she hadn't realised he had a secret sweet tooth.

There was a long break in the conversation as the trifle was treated with the respect it deserved. Tallie, whose own sweet tooth had disappeared during her pregnancy, watched her husband and her brother attack the towering confection with gusto. She was hard put to it to decide which one of them enjoyed it the most, but she could see which of the two had never tasted trifle before.

Her little brother was still dressed in his ill-fitting clothes. There would be time enough tomorrow to find more suitable attire. But he looked a great deal cleaner in the face and the hands, at any rate.

Tallie smiled as she observed the ecstatic expression that pa.s.sed over the thin, vivid face with each sweet, gooey mouthful.

He looked so much like her, she mused. There could be no doubt in the world that they were brother and sister. It was an utterly wonderful thought--people would look at them and know they belonged to each other. But it was such a peculiar feeling, to be looking across a table at someone and seeing a miniature version of oneself. The same curly hair in a dozen tawny shades. The same freckled, pointy nose--only his didn't turn up, like hers. And the same eyes. The same eyes! The thought hit Tallie like a bombsh.e.l.l. Ricardo and she had the same eyes. And she had Papa's eyes. And Papa's curly streaky hair. And Papa's nose. And so did Ricardo.

Ricardo was Papa's son! Papa had been wrong. Her brother was her true brother. He wasn't a b.a.s.t.a.r.d. Relief and joy poured into her. b.a.s.t.a.r.dy would have made no difference to her, nor, apparently to Magnus, but it was a huge handicap in the eyes of the world. It would have affected his acceptance in society, his chance of making a good marriage, of making his way in the world. Her little brother had had a difficult enough beginning; she was glad, so very glad, the rest of his life would notbe so hard.She could not keep the wonderful news to herself."Magnus!" she said in a low, excited voice.He turned to her."Ricardo looks exactly like me, does he not?"Magnus glanced from the boy back to her, and nodded."But you are prettier."She blushed with pleasure."Thank you, but that is not the point. I am held to be the image of my father!"

He made the connection instantly.

"So your father was wrong. Delighted to hear it." He reached out and

lifted her hand to kiss it.

"Excellent news for all concern--' He broke off with an oath, staring at her hand.

"Why the devil have you been chewing at your nails again?"

Tallie flushed with embarra.s.sment. She tried to tug her hand from his

grip.

"I'm sorry."

His eyes scanned her face intently."Has something been upsetting you?Or someone? Tell me instantly and I will see to the matter. "Tallie blinked and stared at him in disbelief."Tell me at once, Tallie. There is no point in hiding it." He brandished her ragged nails in her face and ran his thumb over them. "These are testament enough. If someone has been upsetting you I intend to get the matter sorted out immediately. I do not like you to be upset. Did you not speak to Freddie about it--surely he could have sorted the matter out for you?" Tallie tugged on her hand, feeling no small degree of irritation. Who did the stupid man think had upset her--the cook or the butler? Did he think he could just disappear from her life with a cold, horrid formal note and not upset her? She wrenched her hand from his and stood up.

"It is time to get that boy into a proper bath and then to bed," she said.

"Do not change the subject, wife," growled Magnus in a low voice. "There is a time and place for everything," she retorted, 'and this is neither. Now, Harris, could you arrange hot water for his lords.h.i.+p, and also for young Master Ricardo's bath? "

Ricardo looked up, grinning, recognising nothing in the speech except his name.

"Si, Ricardo." He gave Magnus a triumphant look.

"No Richard," he repeated, and allowed Tallie to take him by the hand and lead him from the room.

"He is asleep." Magnus stood at the doorway of Tallie's bedchamber.Tallie nodded."Good," she whispered. And you? she thought. Where are you going to sleep?

"You were right; the puppy did the trick. They're both tucked up in bed together."

Tallie nodded again.

"Good idea that." He stood in the doorway, staring at her, the burning heat of his gaze at odds with the casual diffidence of his voice.

"Um ... I like what you've done to this room."

Tallie nodded again. There was a lump in her throat, making it difficult to talk. Chit-chat, like one had with a guest or a stranger, not a husband.

"Like a garden in the bottom of the sea," he said.

"Very light and airy, all that green... muslin, is it? Nice." He gestured to the gauzy window drapes and then to the curtains surrounding her bed. He strode across the room and caught a bunch of the fine soft fabric in a fist.

He stood there, running it through his fingers for a moment, and then said diffidently, "I thought to sleep in here with you tonight. Do you mind?"

Tallie stared at her husband. Did she mind? Was the man totally blind to her feelings for him? She supposed she had not been as blatant as she'd thought. But how often did one need to tell a man you loved him before he took notice?

"I mean--' he said awkwardly.

"Er ... I know we can't... You can't... Oh, h.e.l.l!" He dashed his hands through his hair and said in a rush, "I know we cannot make love, but if you do not mind, I want very much to.

hold you tonight. "

/// do not mind? She couldn't answer, just shook her head dumbly and held out her arms to him. He reached her in two strides and pulled her into his arms. His mouth came down on hers. tenderness. leashed hunger. possession.After a while he lifted her onto the bed and sat down. He sat therelooking at her, devouring her with his eyes. He reached up to smooth her tumbled curls away from her face, delicately, clumsily, his big hands trembling slightly.

"There were times when I thought I would never do this again, never

see--' His voice cracked and he pulled her tight againlst his chest.

The, too," she whispered, rubbing her face against his freshly shaven chin.

He pulled his head back and stared at her in surprise.

"You thought you'd never see me again? But you didn't know where I

was.""No, I didn't.""Then how?" -He frowned."Why on earth would you think I wouldn't return? You weren't to know I'd gone back to Italy, that I was behind enemy lines. I distinctly told you I'd gone to London on business."

Tallie scanned his puzzled face in utter disbelief.

"I know what you told me," she said, unable to disguise the edge in her voice. She knew his horrid letter off by heart.

"So then...?"She stared at him. He seemed genuinely confused.Magnus stared back at her."You sound upset.""Of course I am upset!" she snapped."How did you expect me to feel when I got that letter?"

"I didn't want to worry you, so--' " Didn't want to worry me! Didn't want to worry me! " Her voice rose in indignation. "You great mutton-headed man! You dumped me here like an unwanted cat and slipped away in the night like a criminal, leaving me a note that said you had important business elsewhere and that I was to get on with my life! How did you expect me to feel?"

Magnus's mouth gaped open. A frown furrowed his brow.

"But it wasn't like that at all," he said slowly.

"It was exactly like that!" Tears quivered on her eyelashes and she groped for a handkerchief.

"Oh, drat it. This always happens," she mumbled, and reached for one of the muslin bed curtains to dry her eyes. He lifted her trembling hands from her face, holding them gently in his, and gazed into her swimming eyes.

"You thought I had abandoned you?" he said slowly.

Tallie nodded.

"That I didn't care?"

She nodded again.

His grip s.h.i.+fted and he lifted her hands, the ragged nails showing

stark and ugly between his fingers.

"Then these..." he stroked them with his large tanned thumbs 'are all

my fault. "

Tallie said nothing. She bit on her lip.

"Oh, G.o.d," Magnus groaned.

"I never dreamed you would take it like that."

"What did you expect?" she whispered.

"I told you I loved you."

"But-' " But what?

"Women say that sort of thing all the time," Magnus said after a

moment.

"I was not sure you really meant it."

Tallie closed her eyes, unbearably hurt. After a time she managed to

say, "Well, I did. I'm sorry if you don't--' " Hus.h.!.+ " he murmured, and drew her into his arms. A long silence pa.s.sed with only the sound of two heartbeats to fill it.

"I have heard more " I love you's than I care to remember. Starting with my mother," he began in a low, roughened voice.

Tallie drew back a little, regarding him with heavy eyes.

"But I thought--' Magnus gave a hard little laugh.

"Only in company, of course. Then she pretended to dote on me. As for the rest... She couldn't bear the sight of me."

"But why?""G.o.d knows. I started by ruining her figure; I remember thataccusation." He shrugged carelessly, but Tallie could sense the ancient wounds in him. They had cut very deep. She stroked hischeek."Oh, it's all water under the bridge now," he said, 'but Isuppose it made me hesitate to. to trust a woman. I have known a number of women," he continued.

"Birds of paradise, cyprians, that sort of thing. Each one told methey loved me." He shrugged."Always when they wanted something--a bauble of some sort, usually...

Although sometimes it was because they had betrayed me and were trying to placate me with their lies.."

Tallie continued stroking his cheek, loving the faint rasp of whiskers beneath her skin. He was telling her he could never love her. She