First Channel Part 24

"Yes! I think what happens is that each time, some of the selyn goes into that reservoir-and stays there, permanently, unless the person learns to get at it."

"Rimon," said Kadi, "considering what you and I went through when Zeth was born, I don't think you've found the way to get at it."

"Oh, but I have! When I take transfer in healing mode-all the selyn goes into that reservoir. That's why I'm still in need until I balance my fields. What I really do is draw the selyn into my system, ready for use-and that doesn't hurt at all!"

"You may be right, Rimon," said Abel, "but if you do have this 'reservoir,' what is it for?"

"Survival. A Sime who has it can store up two months' worth of selyn at once. Then the second month he can draw from his reserve-or use it to fight, or survive in the cold, or augment. Only he can't get at it by himself he has to have a Gen to provide resistance. However, the Gen can be low-field, or even scared-and it still works."

"Do you think we all have it?" asked Carlana.

"I don't know. Jord seems to. It may be a new mutation, or there may have been Simes with the capacity all along or every Sime may have it, but not use it. Maybe a trauma at changeover opens it. We just don't know enough yet. Every new piece of information brings up a hundred new questions."

"Such as why this reservoir of yours becomes an a.s.set rather than a liability only when you have Gens willing to help you get at the selyn you have stored. Surely that is another indication that we're slowly finding out G.o.d's plan," said Abel.

"I think we're headed in the right direction," Rimon agreed. "I wish Jord had been here to zlin what I did to Jon, and I want to zlin Jord in healing mode again."

Abel frowned. "Where is Jord? He knew we'd be planning-"

Rimon said, "He's post. He doesn't want to sit around talking theories!"

"He's what?"

"Post-kill-or, in this case, post-transfer. If you're right, it's his first time. You'd better not expect his feet to touch the ground until sometime tomorrow."

Kadi looked up and said quietly, "Rimon-Willa's post, too."

For the first time, Rimon considered what that could mean. Jord and Willa were just as inexperienced as he and Kadi had been, and he recalled Kadi's concern that Willa's adolescent emotions were fixed on Jord.

Just then the door opened, and the truants entered. Both were smiling, both had the too-neat look of freshly tucked clothing and just-combed hair, and both were flushed with a fresh and innocent joy.

Jord took Willa's hand, and approached his parents. Willa looked up at him proudly, joyfully, as he said, "Father-Mother-I have, good news. Willa has consented to become my wife."

Chapter Nineteen.

AN OLD FIGHT.

Only Del shared Rimon and Kadi's concern over lord's intention to marry Willa. Fort Freedom exploded in a rush of wedding plans, everyone as excited as if his own child were getting married. There was no use trying to talk to Willa-she was in paradise, certain that Jord was the husband Rimon and Kadi had promised her.

While the wedding plans went forward, Rimon and Jord tested everyone in Fort Freedom in turn, always a few days after a kill, hoping to find someone who could imitate the healing mode.

Their lack of success was disheartening.

The one thing that brightened Rimon's days was the security of having Kadi back for transfer. The next time, everyone left them alone with their son. That evening, with Zeth well-fed, warm, dry, and sound asleep, Rimon and Kadi prepared for transfer. He sighed. "At this moment I can't believe I've ever known s.e.xual desire-and yet I know it will be there after transfer, and I won't be able to hold back. Kadi, what am I going to do when you're fertile again?"

"Let's not spoil this time by worrying about next time."

"Then let's worry about last time."

"Huh?"

"I didn't satisfy you. This time you take control. Don't stop until you're satisfied."

"But-"

"What do you think I'm going to do-burst?"

She giggled. Her nager bubbled with delight, but he could feel that she was relieved. How long he might have remained in antic.i.p.ation, Rimon would never know-it was Kadi who could stand it no longer. She began to pour selyn into him, deep into every nerve, a solid, sure torrent that coursed through his system-and on into that reservoir he could suddenly perceive etched in glowing force, yielding before the impact of Kadi's selyn until he began to feel he would indeed burst.

The warmth of Kadi's relaxation held him for a moment before his own pleasure took command of him, drawing him to physical consciousness of Kadi's body against his as she resumed control, making love to him hungrily, pa.s.sionately.

On the wedding day, Rimon, Kadi, Willa, and Jon a.s.sembled early at the Veritt home. Jord was not there; Abel informed them that he was praying and meditating in the chapel.

"This will be an important day for all of us," said Abel. "Last month we found that Jord and Willa could have transfer; this month we'll prove that before the whole world. Sara Fenell, Dan Whelan, and the others have agreed to be here today. I pray that they will now return."

If not, neither community may survive, Rimon thought. He had had so much work in Fort Freedom's fields because they didn't have the labor force to raise and harvest their cash crops with twenty per cent of the population trying to work their land independently-but if Fort Freedom was having problems, the dissenters were even worse off. They had only one advantage: Dan Whelan had been Fort Freedom's blacksmith. Del, who would not go to Whelan over Carlana's objections, complained constantly about the sloppy blacksmithing done by the woman in town, always comparing her to the woman Syrus Farris had running his smithy.

Del and Carlana appeared about an hour before the ceremony, with their children freshly scrubbed and dressed in new clothes. Jana was a little angel in a yellow dress today, and Owen had a suit and cape like Del's. Everyone else was neat and clean, but none wore new clothes except the bride and groom. There were no luxuries this year.

As everyone was a.s.sembling before the chapel, the dissenters appeared. People made way for them, warily, silently. Dan Whelan led the group to the chapel door, where Abel was standing. Sara Fenell hung back somewhat. Rimon understood her conflict. She would always remember that her son had died trying what Willa would do today. If only Abel could make her look to the future instead of the past...

Abel greeted everyone warmly. "We're pleased that you've returned to share our joy in this day. Please come in, and send your children to the front of the chapel. We wish all the children to see what it can mean for Sime and Gen to be together."

Whelan stopped before Abel. "I said I'd come back and listen to you if you could prove to me that Simes could live without killing. I'm here to see that proof."

"Enter freely and be welcome," said Abel.

Families shooed their children into the front rows, hiding their own nervousness. It couldn't be that they feared Jord would kill Willa-anyone who had seen them together must be well over that fear. But the questions would come now, from children who didn't yet know of the kill, but who were old enough to have some idea of what they were witnessing.

Jord was waiting at the front of the chapel, as far from the tensions of the congregation as possible. He was edgy, like a normal Sime in need, but his smile when Willa approached was quite genuine, and he relaxed visibly as she stood beside him.

Abel took the lecture stand and briefly instructed the congregation that they must permit themselves to observe the transfer in duoconsciousness. Rimon felt the increased tension in Veritt's staunchest supporters and the blatant disapproval in the little group around Sara Fenell.

He remembered the first time they'd come into the chapel, how serene and healthy everyone, had seemed compared to their own hardened and unkempt appearance. Now, despite their impeccable grooming, the people of Fort Freedom seemed gaunt with trial.

As Abel spoke, trying to convince them it was no sin to use their Sime senses in the presence of G.o.d, there was a stirring of excitement-even hope-among them. Today would see the beginning of the end of their guilt. Their increasing hope seemed to double the load Rimon carried.

Abel kept his remarks brief and to the point, not making the couple wait while he spun out philosophical theories. When he called Jord and Willa before him, he asked only for a short, silent prayer for the young couple embarking on a long life together.

The other Simes in the chapel were excited, focusing intently on what was about to happen. Sara Fenell had her arms crossed, hugging herself. Dan Whelan folded his hands in his lap, but the knuckles were white. The La.s.siters were clutching each other's hands, tentacles retracted hard. Others knelt in prayer, eyes closed, but zilnning carefully.

Rimon, too, closed his eyes, letting himself be carried away with relief as Willa gave to Jord, her joy almost outs.h.i.+ning his. When he looked up again, he saw Willa looking up into Jord's eyes with that same starry ecstasy she had shown after their first transfer. Around the room, disbelief fought with soaring hope. Many were crying. At the back of the chapel, where those in need had been seated, the door opened as some left hastily.

A murmur of spontaneous prayer rose from the a.s.sembly, as everyone shared that moment with Willa and Jord, poised at the edge of post-syndrome. Rimon relived that first moment of disbelief with Kadi, when she had given him transfer and they had both found themselves alive afterward-that indescribable sensation that at last everything was all right. He felt it from Kadi-she must be sharing the same memory. He put his arm around her, and reached with his other hand to touch Zeth, binding them together.

When the wave of emotion had ebbed, Abel broke his long silence to call Rimon and Kadi forward. They had the place of honor as witnesses while Abel performed the strange ceremony of vows that const.i.tuted the Fort Freedom pledge ceremony. Rimon had gathered that in Gen Territory his marriage to Kadi would not be recognized, because they had not pledged before witnesses-while Jord and Willa were now considered to be permanently married through the spoken words, and not through emotional commitment, living together, or having children.

Rimon's puzzlement was swept aside by the powerful tonic of Willa's happiness. He and Kadi were caught up in the hope and joy of the people as they swirled out of the chapel singing out their strange, traditional songs, surrounding the bride and groom. Abel, in the midst of it all, was glowing almost as much as his son, happier than Rimon had ever seen him.

Out in front of the chapel, everyone crowded around Jord and Willa again, congratulating them, respectfully asking to zlin them. As the crowd began to disperse, Dan Whelan approached Abel. "I have seen," he said simply. "May G.o.d forgive me for doubting."

"G.o.d is merciful," replied Abel. "He will understand. Will you return to us now, Dan?"

Whelan's tentacles flicked nervously but were instantly restrained.

Veritt added, "Even though we believe you erred, we admire you for following the dictates of your conscience. Come back to us, Dan."

"Mr. Veritt, my son, Uel-knows. But he has never seen a kill. Today he saw-oh, surely he saw G.o.d's mercy in action!"

"He saw another witch in action!"

Kadi jumped, startled, and five Simes near her likewise started at the surge in her field. She settled immediately as she recognized Sara Fenell.

"No, Sara!" said Dan. "You saw it yourself-how could you think Willa a witch?"

"Will you all be taken in? Look at these women demons in the bodies of Gens. Rimon Farris is a sorcerer sent to steal your souls. And he's succeeding. Look you how he has made his way into your midst, seducing your own son, Abel Veritt, with one of his succubi. Yonder stands Jon Forester-why is he not able to give selyn to someone? Not his own parents dare touch him, only Rimon Farris. And why is that?"

"Because Rimon's protecting me, that's why!" said Jon. "But you come on-I'll give you transfer right now. I'll show you Rimon's no sorcerer!"

On the wave of his anger, Jon might actually have been able to do it, Rimon thought. An overpowering emotion could wipe out fear, as Kadi had found at their first transfer. But it wouldn't sustain Jon. Abel on one side and Rimon on the other immediately pulled him back, as Sara Fenell said, "Shall I kill you to prove you are wrong, Jon? The Devil will not gain my soul so easily, although I see he has made progress toward obtaining yours."

She turned to the group of dissenters, who had formed a cl.u.s.ter between herself and Dan Whelan. "You see? This boy is being corrupted, the way Drust was corrupted. Can you not learn from my son's experience? How many of your children must die?"

Margid Veritt came up and put her arm around the distraught woman's shoulders. "Sara," she said softly, "you're upset. Please, come with me where you can rest-"

The other woman flung her off. "I'm not having a woman's hysteria! As a mother, Margid, think! Jord is your son!"

"Would you have me question what G.o.d has revealed to my husband?" asked Margid.

"There is nothing to understand except the bare facts. Rimon Farris has not yet bent Jon to his will; he has not yet gained the boy's soul. When he does, Jon will be like these women-a vessel for selyn, controlled by this sorcerer, and in turn used to control you and lead you to d.a.m.nation."

By this time, Jord and Willa had moved close beside Abel. Now Jord said, "Mrs. Fenell, this is the second month I have not killed. Does that mean nothing to you? Rimon has taught Willa, who is teaching me-and while I learn, she can keep me free of the kill. Can you not envision a world in which Simes and Gens teach one another to live together in peace?"

"No! If G.o.d had meant that, Gens would not die when Simes took selyn!"

"But we don't," said Willa.

"You see, Jord Veritt? This demon has your soul in her grasp. There's no use talking to you. Is there no one here who can see how first the Gens are corrupted, and then used to corrupt the Simes?"

"Sara, please," said Abel, "won't you stay and pray with us? We'll listen to your objections, try to answer your questions."

"I listened to you, Abel Veritt, when you were on G.o.d's true path. You taught me well, then. I shall pray for your return to the true way."

Once more Sara Fenell made her retreat from Fort Freedom-but this time far fewer people followed her. Rimon felt Kadi's astonishment, but he understood. Abel Veritt had placed his faith in Rimon, and though all it seemed to bring him was grief, his faith remained unshaken. What do they want of me? Why won't he turn to Jord now? Why won't they all turn to Jord now? But maybe they will when they really understand what Jord and Willa are, maybe then they'll take some of the pressure off of me.

The 'summer ended and the cold rains of fall began again. This time, though, Kadi was not so shut in. They had gla.s.s in the windows, and their new stove provided far more heat than the fireplace they had huddled around last winter. Zeth was a constant joy, a good baby who fussed only when there was something wrong, but whose curious black eyes soon followed everything that went on.

They missed Willa's help, and also the girl's sunny personality. Jon s.h.i.+fted from hope to fear to anxiety to pride each time Jord or Rimon drew from him in healing mode, and he would vow that next month he'd be ready to give transfer-but each month, as he grew high-field again, his anxiety grew with it until Rimon again ruled out the attempt.

They spent a good deal of time at Fort Freedom, but when they were home they never lacked company; if Jord and Willa were not there, it would be Del's whole family. Both Owen and Jana learned to ride quickly and loved going places on their ponies. Owen confided, "Jana's almost as much fun as a boy now, but I wish Zeth would grow up so we could play together."

"There are no boys Owen's age at Fort Freedom," Carlana explained, and Rimon remembered that the Fifes, who had a four-year-old son, had elected to stay with Sara Fenell in the half-empty row of houses along the creek. They had also heard that the Fife family had bought a female Gen from Slina and kept her for two months without killing her.

"Do you think they're trying to raise the girl to be like Willa?" Kadi asked Carlana.

"Yes, I think that's what they're doing. I wanted to do it myself, but Del said no."

"And you just let it go at that?"

"No, I-I talked with Mr. Veritt about Del. He said Del is right to make me take responsibility for my own decisions. And I think if I had insisted, Del would have given in. I don't know, Kadi. If anyone can tame a wild thing and make it love him, it's Del. But if he failed, he would hurt more than anyone else. So we'll wait. If others succeed, I will insist."

That was the state of all their friends, torn between hope and fear. And from time to time, especially during the last days before a transfer, Rimon would retreat to Billy's grave, carefully tending the plants and hedges there, the physical labor somehow easing his guilt.

Besides the emotional turmoil, there were simple problems of survival-for the first time, Rimon and Kadi were better off than their friends at Fort Freedom. With their manpower spread thin by the schism during the growing season, their cash crops had suffered. Now they were short of funds. Dan Whelan was working hard to repair all their equipment, but he was running short of metal.

The big argument wherever three men gathered in Fort Freedom was whether to do without the necessary metal or to break one of their most cherished principles and deal with one of the outlaw bands that raided Gen Territory for metal mined from the ruins of the Ancients. But Veritt would not yield on that point. He said there was blood on that metal-the blood of those Gens who mined it, those from whom it was stolen, and the blood of Simes who paid dearly for their raids into the heart of Gen Territory.

Nonetheless, the Year's Turning ceremony was a time of great celebration, as Abel detailed the progress from the year before. Two more children had established, and both had elected to stay with their families, giving their selyn to Rimon each month as Jon did. Even though both had the same problems Jon had, their presence was a ray of hope.

Willa seemed happy, easing Jord's growing tension without causing him to lash out at her. Zlinning Willa, Rimon found none of that tension in her that had bothered him for so long in Kadi. Kadi had had to learn not to hide her true feelings, something it simply never occurred to Willa to do. Nonetheless, around Jord and Willa, he felt a kind of precarious stasis, as if Jord would soon face something similar to what had happened to Rimon last winter, the day of Carlana's miscarriage. When he came through that, he'd be in control or" himself.

Then one snowy day, as what looked like an all-day blizzard began to pile snow around their homestead, they had an unexpected visitor: Risko, the man who worked for Slina, and whom Rimon had healed the very first time he'd ever used his healing mode.

"Rimon, we got problems at the Pens," he explained. "What's wrong?"

"Slina got in a prime Gen a few weeks ago-marked as Farris stock, he is, but I told her she shoulda asked you."

"You think she was cheated?"

"Worse than that. He's sick-and it's spreading through the Pens. We lost three already, and if we can't stop it, well-look at the snow comin' down. You may not need our stock, but everyone else does, and-"

"It's all right, Risko," said Rimon. "I'll come and do whatever I can. Kadi, Jon-you come along and-no, you might catch it. You go to Fort Freedom and tell Jord to come help me."

"Slina's already gone to ask Abel Veritt for help," said Risko. "We heard his son's a healer, like you."

"He'll help," said Rimon. "Everyone in Fort Freedom who can do anything will."

It was not only that they needed Gens to survive; it was that they knew full well that if the Simes in the little border town were shorted, they'd have .no qualms about hunting across the border-and right across the border was the community where Fort Freedom sent their established children.

When Rimon reached Slina's, three wagons were just pulling away-Simes stocking up on Gens with an eye on the gathering storm. Inside, Rimon found both Abel and Jord in the office, Willa at Jord's side.

"Willa, it's a Gen illness," Rimon told her. "You mustn't stay here-see, I didn't even bring Kadi."