A Devil May Cry Fanfic 73 Guess This Is A Shotgun Wedding

"...ok but how do we explain all the bruises and cuts when we weren't even on a job?"

Lady asked she lost to trish

"...blame it on local gang fighting?"

Trish offers lady just nodded true since the crime rates insane here that could cover it.

"Cool ok where are they? I don't hear anything..."

"Check upstairs it's probably safe"

Lady sighed and was about to check upstairs but Dante came down in his boxers. The girls stared at him.

"Can't I make him teach her he basically taught her everything alre- ow ow ok dam"

Trish was zapping her in the back not really strong but just enough to hurt a little.

"You two do realize she's sleeping right?

Lady wanted to backflip she really didn't wanna teach a naive straight woman about how likening d.i.c.ks can get you pregnant.

"Great chat let's leave sweetie you heard the man...son of a sparda"

*she gets zapped in the b.o.o.bs*

"...want us to come back in a hour?"

Dante just nodded and went back upstairs to go cuddle with his exhausted wife.

~a hour later and 10 minutes later since lady had to teach lily something~

Lady stared mouth a gap at the stick. This girl didn't lose her virginity to long ago and was already gonna have a kid thanks to Dante it's literally been four days since he popped the question.

"Lady oh no am I dying?"

(Naive lily sweet dam naive death with t.i.ts...f.u.c.k)

Lady thinks to herself.

"It's a shotgun wedding..."

"But I don't have a shotgun!"

*Lady suppresses a laugh at her*

"Dante's-dan f.u.c.k he'll explain it you sheltered little sheep"

"...baaa?"

Lady can't hold in her laughter she just breaks down and started to crack up at this naive woman. lily giggles with her since she was making a awkward attempt at a joke.

*the door to the shop opened and Nero and Dante walked in holding some suits for the wedding later*

(...am I gonna have to tie his tie or some dumb s.h.i.+t?)

*Nero thought stareing at the suits*

Neither of them had said anything and the door opening and closing wasn't that loud.

"Their home I'll go ask Dante what a shotgun wedding is~"

Lily was about to go downstairs when lady grabbed her hand.

"...my dense little sheep of a woman look at the stick, you've seen memes I think you'll get it"

She holds up the stick so lily could see it for herself. But she f.u.c.king faints again due to shock.

"Holy s.h.i.+t"

*lady quickly caught lily so she doesn't split her head open when she'd fall onto the tiles on the bathroom floor.

[they are both fully dressed]

both Nero and Dante with their demon senses heard the sudden stop of a heart and restart but they both ran up to check on wtf just happened.

*dante kicked the door in to the bathroom and was aiming his guns as the door shattered into a bunch of tiny pieces, Nero was holding his red queen and prepared to kill whatever may have been the threat.*

But it was just lady holding a unconscious lily. Dante rushed over to lily and took her from lady.

"What happened? We heard a heart stop pretty much as soon as we came back she's not sick is she?"

Nero was probably just as worried as Dante but his eyes weren't blood red like Dante's and he definitely wasn't eminenting bloodl.u.s.t like Dante currently was while he's still clutching his unconscious bride.

"No she's not sick she fai- wait her heart stopped?!"

Nero nodded

"It's fine now it was only about a minute and a half pause but still..."

"Holy c.r.a.p that's definitely not good for the baby"

"Baby?!"

Both the boys said completely shocked.

"Baby I'm calling a doctor to have her checked out because baby... just asking you've only been engaged for four days how much did you two..."

Dante being dead serious

"I lost count"

Lady awkwardly nods and walks out to go get someone to check lily out to make sure the kid was all right.