Reflections Of A Man Part 11

She knows when it comes from you, its out of love; but when it comes from a stranger, its more often than not, out of l.u.s.t.

With that in mind, take every opportunity to put a smile on the face of the woman you love. After all, what greater feeling is there than to know that she is happy and smiling, and youre the reason for it.

Shed Rather Hear Your Voice She would much rather hear your voice than read your text.

Its not the words you speak, but the emotions you convey through your speed, tone, and style that give her insight into your sincerity.

In her mind, the words I love you or I miss you may look good in a text, but when she hears you say them and your actions support it.i.t simply feels good.

Be Different Than Her Ex Dont try to be better than her ex, be different from her ex. Shes tired of the same old thing. Shes ready for you to show her something different.

The compet.i.tion is over: you won. If she wanted more of what he had to offer, she would have gone back to him, but instead, she chose you. Dont give her more of the same thing. Create a whole new lane and show her something different.

Notice The Small Things When you dont take the time to notice the little things, such as her new hair style, or her new nail color or outfit, she not only notices, but she makes a mental note of the fact that you didnt notice as well.

Pay attention to the little things that she does and dont be afraid to compliment her. You may think that she wont notice or that it doesnt matter but it does. She cares about your opinion. Plus, she does these things, not only for herself, but at times, for you as well.

At every chance, let her know how beautiful she is and that you truly appreciate her.

Challenge Her Challenge her to be the best she can be. Sometimes, just knowing you support her is all the extra push she needs.

You, being her man and one of the most important people in her life right now, your support means a lot to her. She looks to you to challenge her and support her every step of the way. If she cant count on you, then who? You have to understand that she may get frustrated at times and say that she doesnt need your help. She may also tell you that she can do it all on her own, and that may be true too, but at the end of the day, youre her man and because she has youshe shouldnt have to.

Keep Her Close Pay attention to her. Talk to her. Listen to her. Love her. Respect her. Keep her so close that you leave no room for her to doubt.

Doubt comes from there being distance between the two of you; whether that distance is in a physical, mental or emotional form, the result can be very stressful on your relations.h.i.+p. The man that understands this will do everything in his power to keep her close, leaving her no room to doubt his love for her and his uncompromising loyalty and commitment to her and the relations.h.i.+p.

Love Is Not About Cuffing For A Season Real love is not about cuffing her for a season. Its about setting her heart free to love and trust you without the fear of consequences for a lifetime.

To remove her fears, you have to make her feel secure in the relations.h.i.+p. To make it last a lifetime, you have to be willing to commit to her. Thats the type of love a good man givesthats the type of love a good woman needs.

Make It Believable Simply telling her you love her is not enough, you have to consistently show her as well. Its the combination of the two that makes it believable.

When you only say that you love her, she still has questions because she hears it, but she never sees it. When you only show her that you love her, she still has questions because she sees it, but she never hears it. However, when you tell her that you love her, and you show her as well, she not only sees it and hears it, but she now feels it. And the feeling of being truly loved, is what makes it believable.

Take Her Breath Away Thats what she wantsthats what she needs.

You see, she needs a man that can take her breath away

and make it hard for her to breathe.

She needs a man that makes her feel so weak

that she drops down to her knees;

but not for the reason you think.

You see, even the wrong man can catch her eye, but only

the right man can capture her imagination

and stimulate her mind.

So when she drops down to her knees, its to thank G.o.d

for his hand,

in putting her in the right place, at the right time,

to meet the right man.

Thats all she ever wanted.thats all she ever needed.

What Are Her Dreams.

What are her dreams and ambitions?.

Have you asked her?.

If not, why?.

Thats a big part of being her man.

How can you support what you dont know?.

Part III.

For Both Of You.

CHAPTER.

Twenty-One.

MAKING IT.

WORK.

When the love is real, you wont have to find time for each other youll make time.

Part Of The Solution Its hard for either of you to help find a solution when you both refuse to recognize that your actions or inactions may be a part of the problem.

Its a lot easier for you to blame each other, for all of the problems in the relations.h.i.+p, than to accept the fact that your actions or inactions may have caused at least some of the problems in the first place. This goes both ways. In order for you to be able to find viable solutions to any problem, you both have to be willing to accept the fact that you, yourself, may be a part of the problem to begin with. If you both take this approach and are honest with yourselves and each other, your discussions, which previously would have turned into arguments, should become more productive. Thats because you will have s.h.i.+fted from a blame based way of thinking to a more solution based way of thinking.

Remember, the goal of the discussion is not for either person to win. The goal is to find a solution that works for both of you and allows your relations.h.i.+p to move forward in a positive direction.

Arguments Dont Solve Anything Arguments dont solve anything. The louder you get, the less the other person listens; in the end, you may think you have wonbut at what cost?

Dont risk your happiness over something that means nothing more to you than a personal stroke to your ego. Remember, you two are on the same team. That means if one of you lose, you both lose. You can minimize your arguments by not playing the blame game. If theres a problem, look for a solution that is in the best interest of the relations.h.i.+p.

Dont Make Rules That You Wont Follow Stop making rules, in your relations.h.i.+p, that you expect them to follow, but you are unwilling to follow yourself.

If there are going to be rules, then the rules should be agreed upon and equally applied. If one or more rules are going to be applied differently, then both of you should agree to it (not just one of you). No one person in a relations.h.i.+p should have privilege over the other; its a partners.h.i.+p, not a dictators.h.i.+p. I know they say that life isnt always fair, but in my opinion, your relations.h.i.+p should always try to be.

Dont Become A Stranger When was the last time you two just sat down and talked? Dont let the one you love become a stranger make time for each other today.

Often times we become so wrapped up in our day-to-day activities that we forget to just sit down and talk to the ones we love. There are some people out there, right now, who are at the point where they walk in and out of rooms without speaking to each other; they pa.s.s each other in the hallway as if the other person doesnt even exist, and they sleep in the same bed physically, but emotionally, theyre separated.

Dont ever let this become you. Always make time for each other.

The Magic Is In Your Presence Take time to make time for each other.

They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder, but I believe that absence makes two hearts grow apart. Remember how you fell in love; it wasnt all the time you spent away from each other that caused you to feel the way you do, but rather those powerful moments that you spent together.

When it comes to love, the magic is found in the presence, not the absence. Too much of an absence and the magic begins to fade away.

Healthy Relations.h.i.+p Healthy, strong relations.h.i.+ps are based upon building up, not tearing down.

For a relations.h.i.+p to survive, both of you need to feel like you have an equal say in matters and that your opinion counts. For one of you to tear the other down with verbal abuse, physical abuse or other methods of intimidation, serves no other purpose but to weaken the unit as a whole. This will ultimately destroy your relations.h.i.+p.

Instead of tearing each other down, focus on ways to build each other up; support and encourage each other through both words and actions. The goal should be to grow stronger every day as a couple. Actively take time to focus on this. Act as if you were being watched every day and that you would receive a grade on your performance at the end of each day. Its a fact that when you focus on certain things, you perform better at those things than when you dont focus on them. I know it sounds like a lot of work, but trust me, once youve changed your way of thinking, and it becomes a habit, it will get easier. In the end, your relations.h.i.+p will continue to grow without limits! So todaylets focus!

Nothing Comes Between You As long as you love him and he loves you and you both are fully committed to making it work, nothing or no one can ever come between you.

Thats the true power of mutual love and commitment. It creates an impenetrable circle of love that cant be broken from the outside only from the inside.

Talking About Anything If you two can talk to each other openly and honestly about anything and everything, you two can get through anything and everything.

Strength Of Your Relations.h.i.+p When things get hard, dont just give up without trying; its those hard times that often help define the true strength of the relations.h.i.+p.