Our American Cousin Part 13

Asa [Taking bottle out.] Oh, he did, did he? Wal, I guess he'll do his best all the same.

Flo I shall be missed at the archery grounds. Will you take me back?

Asa Like a streak of lightning. [Offers arm and takes her to dairy.]

Flo That's not the way.

Asa No, of course not. [Takes her round stage back to dairy.]

Flo Well, but where are you going now?

Asa I was just going round. I say, cousin, don't you think you could find your way back alone.

Flo Why, what do _you_ want to do?

Asa Wal, I just wanted to see how they make cheese is this darned country. [Exits into dairy.]

Flo [Laughing.] And they call that man a savage; well, I only wish we had a few more such savages in England.

Dun [Without, R. 2 E.] This way, lovely sufferer.

Flo Ah, here's Dundreary.

[Dundreary enters with Georgina, places her in rustic chair, R.]

Dun There, repothe yourself.

Geo Thank you, my lord; you are so kind to me, and I am so delicate.

Flo Yes, you look delicate, dear; how is she this morning any better?

Dun When she recovers, she'll be better.

Flo I'm afraid you don't take good care of her, you are so rough.

Dun No, I'm not wruff, either. [Sings.] I'm gentle and I'm kind, I'm ---- I forget the rest

Flo Well, good morning, dear--do take care of her--good day, Dundreary.

[Exit through gate.]

Dun Now, let me administer to your wants. How would you like a roast chestnut?

Geo No, my lord, I'm too delicate.

Dun Well, then, a peanut; there is a great deal of nourishment in peanuts.

Geo No, thank you.

Dun Then what can I do for you?

Geo If you please, ask the dairy maid to let me have a seat in the dairy. I am afraid of the draft, here.

Dun Oh! you want to get out of the draft, do you? Well, you're not the only one that wants to escape the draft. Is that the dairy on top of that stick? [Points to pigeon house.]

Geo No, my lord, that's the pigeon house.

Dun What do they keep in pigeon houses? Oh! pigeons, to be sure; they couldn't keep donkeys up there, could they? That's the dairy, I suppothe?

Geo Yes, my lord.

Dun What do they keep in dairies?

Geo Eggs, milk, b.u.t.ter and cheese.

Dun What's the name of that animal with a head on it? No, I don't mean that, all animals have heads. I mean those animals with something growing out of their heads.

Geo A cow?

Dun A cow growing out of his head?

Geo No, no, horns.

Dun A cow! well, that accounts for the milk and b.u.t.ter; but I don't see the eggs; cows don't give eggs; then there's the cheese--do you like cheese?

Geo No, my lord.

Dun Does your brother like cheese?

Geo I have no brother. I'm so delicate.

Dun She's so delicate, she hasn't got a brother. Well, if you had a brother do you think he'd like cheese?

Geo I don't know; do please take me to the dairy.

Dun Well, I will see if I can get you a broiled sardine. [Exit into dairy.]

Geo [Jumps up.] Oh! I'm so glad he's gone. I am so dreadful hungry. I should like a plate of corn beef and cabbage, eggs and bacon, or a slice of cold ham and pickles.

Dun [Outside] Thank you, thank you.

Geo [Running back to seat.] Here he comes. Oh! I am so delicate.

Enter Dundreary.

Dun I beg you pardon, Miss Georgina, but I find upon enquiry that cows don't give sardines. But I've arranged it with the dairy maid so that you can have a seat by the window that overlooks the cow house and the pig sty, and all the pretty things.